Totems

[sooch2448]

(appologies in advance for the length)My name is connor thompson, im just about to turn 18. Im not a satanist, and im not really a christian, but i dont hate either one, any whoo back to my point. i talked to a few people on here a while back about some questions. Throughout most of my life i felt i had been targeted by a demon, in my dreams, while i was awake, i could always sense it when it came into the room. i have been physically attaked, in that ive been punched in the face, didnt get much sleep that night. it especially got bad when i offered to sell my soul to save someone elses life who was terminally ill with cancer. lets just say she was completley opposite of a satanist. i started having dreams after i offered to sell my soul, something came and harrassed me, i didnt sleep, i didnt eat, and i thought i was losing my mind, maybe i was schitzo, or just crazy. it got so bad i debated killing my self, almost did. after she died things got worse for a while, but i had one semi final confrontation with it, and i beat it by not fighting it, and simply not allowing my self to react to it. any ways things cleared up for a while and for the first time in my life i wasnt scared to go to sleep at night, but i started looking for answers about what the hell it was that had followed me for all those years( and finally the story returns to where it began), so i came here. i told someone my story and i asked what they thought. i am already somewhat knowledgeable in religious topics (not to toot my own horn, but beep) because of everything that's happened to me because of all the research Ive done. But when i asked someone on here they asked Azazel for me, and they told me it was a test which i had already figured (but the debabtability of my sanity is still in question) and that it had something to do with my family. she also said she felt what ever it was presence when she asked and that it was strange, and was like no demon she had felt. she then told me that most likely it was not a demon, and she couldn't tell me more. well that left me just a little confused haha. Im part native American and have always been kind of drawn to it. just out of curiosity i began to research totems. i guess it was part of that teenage anxt i guess you know trying to find out who i am because i don't feel my parents or the world understand me cause i smoke and listen to that gosh darn hippidy hop music or whatever. but after all of this had blown over after about six months i had almost forgot about all of this, and for once i kinda felt normal. Until one night getting out of the shower, (the shower is one of the only places i can think straight because of the noise of the fan and the water drowns out everything else) something happened to me that honestly i can only call a nervous breakdown during the most stable time of my life, or a vision. something came and spoke to me it was a presence i had felt before in my dreams, but it was not the bad entity, it had always been in the background whispering to me when i needed it. i saw what i think was aura all around me, and i saw what looked like the outline of a bird above me. at first i thought it was a phoenix, but i noticed the fingered feathers on the wings which is a buzzard or vulture trait. it told me who it was it called itself the duality between light and dark, the paradox of life and death. that it was both and neither because they are one in the same. i lost about 2 hours or more standing in front of my bathroom mirror before coming to. but i researched vulture as a totem which i had actually never heard of or seen before because there's usually the bear, the wolf, the eagle you know all the pretty ones, but never a vulture. and it wasn't again till later when i had another one. but this one was different, i knew this one as well it was a negative one, but it came to me differently this time. it had been in my dreams and following me around, and for some reason i got the name coyote. and again ion front of the mirror i asked who it was, i heard a laugh one i recognized from the time i got punched in the head when i was little. then i heard, i am as likely to trip you as i am to help you up. and i know that coyote is known as a trickster. to make an already longer than it needs to be story short i began to understand who i was. i believe in paradox, and my question is does anyone know what a totem actually is? and is it possible to have two? and that's even if you guys believe in totems, if not ive wasted both our time by typing this assuming you even read this haha. Thanks for your responses if you post any

 

[orion199317]

Not sure what a totem actualy is. But it's supposed to be a representation of someones spirit animal/ guide/ guardian.
And depending on what tribe of native americans you talk to I've heard that in some you can have 2 or even 2 animals on the same totem.


Not all demons are from Satan so it could still be a demon or 2
one trying to help you and one trying to hurt you
or judging from what you said both could be neutral.

Try "getting in touch" with them.
If they really wanted to hurt you they or it probably would have done it by now.

And if it isn't a demon, it may actualy be an animals spirit.
Who knows.

Just don't be afraid and try and talk to it
or if you find yourself in trouble, I'm sure father Satan would help you if you truely needed it
he helped me, and that's why I dedicated myself to him.

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "sooch2448" <r-thompson@... wrote:

(appologies in advance for the length)My name is connor thompson, im just about to turn 18. Im not a satanist, and im not really a christian, but i dont hate either one, any whoo back to my point. i talked to a few people on here a while back about some questions. Throughout most of my life i felt i had been targeted by a demon, in my dreams, while i was awake, i could always sense it when it came into the room. i have been physically attaked, in that ive been punched in the face, didnt get much sleep that night. it especially got bad when i offered to sell my soul to save someone elses life who was terminally ill with cancer. lets just say she was completley opposite of a satanist. i started having dreams after i offered to sell my soul, something came and harrassed me, i didnt sleep, i didnt eat, and i thought i was losing my mind, maybe i was schitzo, or just crazy. it got so bad i debated killing my self, almost did. after she died things got worse for a while, but i had one semi final confrontation with it, and i beat it by not fighting it, and simply not allowing my self to react to it. any ways things cleared up for a while and for the first time in my life i wasnt scared to go to sleep at night, but i started looking for answers about what the hell it was that had followed me for all those years( and finally the story returns to where it began), so i came here. i told someone my story and i asked what they thought. i am already somewhat knowledgeable in religious topics (not to toot my own horn, but beep) because of everything that's happened to me because of all the research Ive done. But when i asked someone on here they asked Azazel for me, and they told me it was a test which i had already figured (but the debabtability of my sanity is still in question) and that it had something to do with my family. she also said she felt what ever it was presence when she asked and that it was strange, and was like no demon she had felt. she then told me that most likely it was not a demon, and she couldn't tell me more. well that left me just a little confused haha. Im part native American and have always been kind of drawn to it. just out of curiosity i began to research totems. i guess it was part of that teenage anxt i guess you know trying to find out who i am because i don't feel my parents or the world understand me cause i smoke and listen to that gosh darn hippidy hop music or whatever. but after all of this had blown over after about six months i had almost forgot about all of this, and for once i kinda felt normal. Until one night getting out of the shower, (the shower is one of the only places i can think straight because of the noise of the fan and the water drowns out everything else) something happened to me that honestly i can only call a nervous breakdown during the most stable time of my life, or a vision. something came and spoke to me it was a presence i had felt before in my dreams, but it was not the bad entity, it had always been in the background whispering to me when i needed it. i saw what i think was aura all around me, and i saw what looked like the outline of a bird above me. at first i thought it was a phoenix, but i noticed the fingered feathers on the wings which is a buzzard or vulture trait. it told me who it was it called itself the duality between light and dark, the paradox of life and death. that it was both and neither because they are one in the same. i lost about 2 hours or more standing in front of my bathroom mirror before coming to. but i researched vulture as a totem which i had actually never heard of or seen before because there's usually the bear, the wolf, the eagle you know all the pretty ones, but never a vulture. and it wasn't again till later when i had another one. but this one was different, i knew this one as well it was a negative one, but it came to me differently this time. it had been in my dreams and following me around, and for some reason i got the name coyote. and again ion front of the mirror i asked who it was, i heard a laugh one i recognized from the time i got punched in the head when i was little. then i heard, i am as likely to trip you as i am to help you up. and i know that coyote is known as a trickster. to make an already longer than it needs to be story short i began to understand who i was. i believe in paradox, and my question is does anyone know what a totem actually is? and is it possible to have two? and that's even if you guys believe in totems, if not ive wasted both our time by typing this assuming you even read this haha. Thanks for your responses if you post any

 

[anandha shankar]

i like to tel you one thing what is the spirit animal guides are the guides as like others and if you contact with proper way and be friendley with tem you will get lots of guidance from them so no need to get scared or get hurt and more over they wont hurt you either they are not sentient beings
From: orion199317 <orion199317@...
To: [email protected]
Sent: Thu, August 12, 2010 2:09:25 PM
Subject: [JoyofSatan666] Re: Totems

  Not sure what a totem actualy is. But it's supposed to be a representation of someones spirit animal/ guide/ guardian.
And depending on what tribe of native americans you talk to I've heard that in some you can have 2 or even 2 animals on the same totem.

Not all demons are from Satan so it could still be a demon or 2
one trying to help you and one trying to hurt you
or judging from what you said both could be neutral.

Try "getting in touch" with them.
If they really wanted to hurt you they or it probably would have done it by now.

And if it isn't a demon, it may actualy be an animals spirit.
Who knows.

Just don't be afraid and try and talk to it
or if you find yourself in trouble, I'm sure father Satan would help you if you truely needed it
he helped me, and that's why I dedicated myself to him.

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "sooch2448" <r-thompson@... wrote:

(appologies in advance for the length)My name is connor thompson, im just about to turn 18. Im not a satanist, and im not really a christian, but i dont hate either one, any whoo back to my point. i talked to a few people on here a while back about some questions. Throughout most of my life i felt i had been targeted by a demon, in my dreams, while i was awake, i could always sense it when it came into the room. i have been physically attaked, in that ive been punched in the face, didnt get much sleep that night. it especially got bad when i offered to sell my soul to save someone elses life who was terminally ill with cancer. lets just say she was completley opposite of a satanist. i started having dreams after i offered to sell my soul, something came and harrassed me, i didnt sleep, i didnt eat, and i thought i

was losing my mind, maybe i was schitzo, or just crazy. it got so bad i debated killing my self, almost did. after she died things got worse for a while, but i had one semi final confrontation with it, and i beat it by not fighting it, and simply not allowing my self to react to it. any ways things cleared up for a while and for the first time in my life i wasnt scared to go to sleep at night, but i started looking for answers about what the hell it was that had followed me for all those years( and finally the story returns to where it began), so i came here. i told someone my story and i asked what they thought. i am already somewhat knowledgeable in religious topics (not to toot my own horn, but beep) because of everything that's happened to me because of all the research Ive done. But when i asked someone on here they asked Azazel for me, and they told me it was a test which i had already figured (but the debabtability of my sanity is still in question) and that it had something to do with my family. she also said she felt what ever it was presence when she asked and that it was strange, and was like no demon she had felt. she then told me that most likely it was not a demon, and she couldn't tell me more. well that left me just a little confused haha. Im part native American and have always been kind of drawn to it. just out of curiosity i began to research totems. i guess it was part of that teenage anxt i guess you know trying to find out who i am because i don't feel my parents or the world understand me cause i smoke and listen to that gosh darn hippidy hop music or whatever. but after all of this had blown over after about six months i had almost forgot about all of this, and for once i kinda felt normal. Until one night getting out of the shower, (the shower is one of the only places i can think straight because of the noise of the fan and the water drowns out everything else) something happened to me that honestly i can only call a nervous breakdown during the most stable time of my life, or a vision. something came and spoke to me it was a presence i had felt before in my dreams, but it was not the bad entity, it had always been in the background whispering to me when i needed it. i saw what i think was aura all around me, and i saw what looked like the outline of a bird above me. at first i thought it was a phoenix, but i noticed the fingered feathers on the wings which is a buzzard or vulture trait. it told me who it was it called itself the duality between light and dark, the paradox of life and death. that it was both and neither because they are one in the same. i lost about 2 hours or more standing in front of my bathroom mirror before coming to. but i researched vulture as a totem which i had actually never heard of or seen before because there's usually the bear, the wolf, the eagle you know all the pretty ones, but never a vulture. and it wasn't again till later when i had another one. but this one was different, i knew this one as well it was a negative one, but it came to me differently this time. it had been in my dreams and following me around, and for some reason i got the name coyote. and again ion front of the mirror i asked who it was, i heard a laugh one i recognized from the time i got punched in the head when i was little. then i heard, i am as likely to trip you as i am to help you up. and i know that coyote is known as a trickster. to make an already longer than it needs to be story short i began to understand who i was. i believe in paradox, and my question is does anyone know what a totem actually is? and is it possible to have two? and that's even if you guys believe in totems, if not ive wasted both our time by typing this assuming you even read this haha. Thanks for your responses if you post any

 

[Connor Thompson]

Both of them are complemetery to one another, coyote is earth and vulture is wind. They balance eachother, and the only reason i think i was tormented was so i could learn, and i have. Im not mad and hold no grudges for all those years, actually its kind of funny if you think about it. and i think thats what i was supposed to learn, maybe im just crazy, actually most likley. i actually do feel in touch with them. however i try not to ask for help from them because i believe that would defeat thier whole purpose. I dont worship them either because i actually dont believe in worshipoing anything because it claims something thing to be perfect. And personally i believe that perfection is paradox, it only exisits as induvidual concepts, there for all worship is flawed because perfection can never truly be agreed upon or recognized, there for it exisits only because as flawed view of an induvidual opposed to a universal tangable concept. i would like to think of them as equalls but i still got a lot to learn.

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "orion199317" <orion199317@... wrote:

Not sure what a totem actualy is. But it's supposed to be a representation of someones spirit animal/ guide/ guardian.
And depending on what tribe of native americans you talk to I've heard that in some you can have 2 or even 2 animals on the same totem.


Not all demons are from Satan so it could still be a demon or 2
one trying to help you and one trying to hurt you
or judging from what you said both could be neutral.

Try "getting in touch" with them.
If they really wanted to hurt you they or it probably would have done it by now.

And if it isn't a demon, it may actualy be an animals spirit.
Who knows.

Just don't be afraid and try and talk to it
or if you find yourself in trouble, I'm sure father Satan would help you if you truely needed it
he helped me, and that's why I dedicated myself to him.




--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "sooch2448" <r-thompson@ wrote:

(appologies in advance for the length)My name is connor thompson, im just about to turn 18. Im not a satanist, and im not really a christian, but i dont hate either one, any whoo back to my point. i talked to a few people on here a while back about some questions. Throughout most of my life i felt i had been targeted by a demon, in my dreams, while i was awake, i could always sense it when it came into the room. i have been physically attaked, in that ive been punched in the face, didnt get much sleep that night. it especially got bad when i offered to sell my soul to save someone elses life who was terminally ill with cancer. lets just say she was completley opposite of a satanist. i started having dreams after i offered to sell my soul, something came and harrassed me, i didnt sleep, i didnt eat, and i thought i was losing my mind, maybe i was schitzo, or just crazy. it got so bad i debated killing my self, almost did. after she died things got worse for a while, but i had one semi final confrontation with it, and i beat it by not fighting it, and simply not allowing my self to react to it. any ways things cleared up for a while and for the first time in my life i wasnt scared to go to sleep at night, but i started looking for answers about what the hell it was that had followed me for all those years( and finally the story returns to where it began), so i came here. i told someone my story and i asked what they thought. i am already somewhat knowledgeable in religious topics (not to toot my own horn, but beep) because of everything that's happened to me because of all the research Ive done. But when i asked someone on here they asked Azazel for me, and they told me it was a test which i had already figured (but the debabtability of my sanity is still in question) and that it had something to do with my family. she also said she felt what ever it was presence when she asked and that it was strange, and was like no demon she had felt. she then told me that most likely it was not a demon, and she couldn't tell me more. well that left me just a little confused haha. Im part native American and have always been kind of drawn to it. just out of curiosity i began to research totems. i guess it was part of that teenage anxt i guess you know trying to find out who i am because i don't feel my parents or the world understand me cause i smoke and listen to that gosh darn hippidy hop music or whatever. but after all of this had blown over after about six months i had almost forgot about all of this, and for once i kinda felt normal. Until one night getting out of the shower, (the shower is one of the only places i can think straight because of the noise of the fan and the water drowns out everything else) something happened to me that honestly i can only call a nervous breakdown during the most stable time of my life, or a vision. something came and spoke to me it was a presence i had felt before in my dreams, but it was not the bad entity, it had always been in the background whispering to me when i needed it. i saw what i think was aura all around me, and i saw what looked like the outline of a bird above me. at first i thought it was a phoenix, but i noticed the fingered feathers on the wings which is a buzzard or vulture trait. it told me who it was it called itself the duality between light and dark, the paradox of life and death. that it was both and neither because they are one in the same. i lost about 2 hours or more standing in front of my bathroom mirror before coming to. but i researched vulture as a totem which i had actually never heard of or seen before because there's usually the bear, the wolf, the eagle you know all the pretty ones, but never a vulture. and it wasn't again till later when i had another one. but this one was different, i knew this one as well it was a negative one, but it came to me differently this time. it had been in my dreams and following me around, and for some reason i got the name coyote. and again ion front of the mirror i asked who it was, i heard a laugh one i recognized from the time i got punched in the head when i was little. then i heard, i am as likely to trip you as i am to help you up. and i know that coyote is known as a trickster. to make an already longer than it needs to be story short i began to understand who i was. i believe in paradox, and my question is does anyone know what a totem actually is? and is it possible to have two? and that's even if you guys believe in totems, if not ive wasted both our time by typing this assuming you even read this haha. Thanks for your responses if you post any

 

[[email protected]]

I have a cousin who is a Druid, that said the totem represents each animals spirit that needs to be confronted, beaten, then becomes a Guide to tell you what ever you need to know, starting from the bottom up. I think taking on this animals traits. But this could be either a certain tribe or possibly Druidic(?) Only saying; you may need to defeat this "trixter" to understand the confusion you feel in your mind..like it could be an aspect of your psyche. Hopefully this helps, let us know as we are all learning something on some level. HAIL SATAN!!!Sent via BlackBerry by AT&TFrom: "orion199317" <orion199317@... Sender: [email protected] Date: Thu, 12 Aug 2010 04:09:25 -0000To: <[email protected]ReplyTo: [email protected] Subject: [JoyofSatan666] Re: Totems
  Not sure what a totem actualy is. But it's supposed to be a representation of someones spirit animal/ guide/ guardian.
And depending on what tribe of native americans you talk to I've heard that in some you can have 2 or even 2 animals on the same totem.

Not all demons are from Satan so it could still be a demon or 2
one trying to help you and one trying to hurt you
or judging from what you said both could be neutral.

Try "getting in touch" with them.
If they really wanted to hurt you they or it probably would have done it by now.

And if it isn't a demon, it may actualy be an animals spirit.
Who knows.

Just don't be afraid and try and talk to it
or if you find yourself in trouble, I'm sure father Satan would help you if you truely needed it
he helped me, and that's why I dedicated myself to him.

--- In [url=mailto:[email protected]][email protected][/url], "sooch2448" <r-thompson@... wrote:

(appologies in advance for the length)My name is connor thompson, im just about to turn 18. Im not a satanist, and im not really a christian, but i dont hate either one, any whoo back to my point. i talked to a few people on here a while back about some questions. Throughout most of my life i felt i had been targeted by a demon, in my dreams, while i was awake, i could always sense it when it came into the room. i have been physically attaked, in that ive been punched in the face, didnt get much sleep that night. it especially got bad when i offered to sell my soul to save someone elses life who was terminally ill with cancer. lets just say she was completley opposite of a satanist. i started having dreams after i offered to sell my soul, something came and harrassed me, i didnt sleep, i didnt eat, and i thought i was losing my mind, maybe i was schitzo, or just crazy. it got so bad i debated killing my self, almost did. after she died things got worse for a while, but i had one semi final confrontation with it, and i beat it by not fighting it, and simply not allowing my self to react to it. any ways things cleared up for a while and for the first time in my life i wasnt scared to go to sleep at night, but i started looking for answers about what the hell it was that had followed me for all those years( and finally the story returns to where it began), so i came here. i told someone my story and i asked what they thought. i am already somewhat knowledgeable in religious topics (not to toot my own horn, but beep) because of everything that's happened to me because of all the research Ive done. But when i asked someone on here they asked Azazel for me, and they told me it was a test which i had already figured (but the debabtability of my sanity is still in question) and that it had something to do with my family. she also said she felt what ever it was presence when she asked and that it was strange, and was like no demon she had felt. she then told me that most likely it was not a demon, and she couldn't tell me more. well that left me just a little confused haha. Im part native American and have always been kind of drawn to it. just out of curiosity i began to research totems. i guess it was part of that teenage anxt i guess you know trying to find out who i am because i don't feel my parents or the world understand me cause i smoke and listen to that gosh darn hippidy hop music or whatever. but after all of this had blown over after about six months i had almost forgot about all of this, and for once i kinda felt normal. Until one night getting out of the shower, (the shower is one of the only places i can think straight because of the noise of the fan and the water drowns out everything else) something happened to me that honestly i can only call a nervous breakdown during the most stable time of my life, or a vision. something came and spoke to me it was a presence i had felt before in my dreams, but it was not the bad entity, it had always been in the background whispering to me when i needed it. i saw what i think was aura all around me, and i saw what looked like the outline of a bird above me. at first i thought it was a phoenix, but i noticed the fingered feathers on the wings which is a buzzard or vulture trait. it told me who it was it called itself the duality between light and dark, the paradox of life and death. that it was both and neither because they are one in the same. i lost about 2 hours or more standing in front of my bathroom mirror before coming to. but i researched vulture as a totem which i had actually never heard of or seen before because there's usually the bear, the wolf, the eagle you know all the pretty ones, but never a vulture. and it wasn't again till later when i had another one. but this one was different, i knew this one as well it was a negative one, but it came to me differently this time. it had been in my dreams and following me around, and for some reason i got the name coyote. and again ion front of the mirror i asked who it was, i heard a laugh one i recognized from the time i got punched in the head when i was little. then i heard, i am as likely to trip you as i am to help you up. and i know that coyote is known as a trickster. to make an already longer than it needs to be story short i began to understand who i was. i believe in paradox, and my question is does anyone know what a totem actually is? and is it possible to have two? and that's even if you guys believe in totems, if not ive wasted both our time by typing this assuming you even read this haha. Thanks for your responses if you post any

 

[Sss D.]

this is about totems http://www.mysticfamiliar.com/library/s ... _2.htm#Rat