Overly Emotional?

[RavenSky666]

I get that this is a group effort, but I'm making an attempt to at least keep up with the average here. I'm not sure on what that is, but I see one user post that he's done 9 RTRs per day, another does 12 RTRs, you know how many I do? Two. Those are pussy numbers for someone who's done this for a long time, losing his way every now and again only to come back weaker than when he started.

The longer I've been an SS, the more that's expected from me, so why not aim for such an extreme number?

You are doing the best for you and that is all that matters. There is no need to try and do too much As Hoodedcobra said in the race awakening post, spamming isn't always the way. It is probably more important how much energy you raise for your Rtrs rather than the quantity that you do. I think doing 3 or 4 really amped up rtrs is probably 100% more effective than doing 18 non amped up rtrs. I did 18 to see if I could do it. I always try to outdo myself to see what my limit is. This is not always a good thing. but I have a need to outdo myself and challenge myself to prove to myself what my limit is and try to challenge it. But one can get caught up on that and it can be unhealthy and dangerous. I say this from experience. Keep doing what you do, you are doing great and your efforts are important. we are all in this together! you are doing great.

 

[Shael]

I just don't want to be tossed in the garbage after all this in favor of the SS that "broke their bones" and contributed a fuckton more than I did. 1-3 RTRs per day? As I said, pussy numbers for someone who has done this a long time. I try to do more, but I exhaust myself in the process. I have no idea how people can do 9-12 per day, keep a full time job, and pay bills.

I just don't want my nightmares to come true.

I understand that, but you need to realize that nothing like that could ever happen. Try to understand Satan and the Gods on a more deep level, and it'll become very clear that they would never toss away anyone because they didnt do as many RTRs as someone else. Most people who do that many RTRs do not have a full-time job, and are in some way or another in a situation where they have more time.

If the Gods cared only about "results" and "efficiency", like some purely-logical machine, then they wouldnt even bother to waste a single second on any of us here. The reason that they help us is because of the love their feel for their creation. They want us to advance and become Gods like them, even though this is definitely NOT the most "efficient" thing to do from a logical standpoint. If all they cared about was gaining more power, then I'm sure there are thousands of other ways to strengthen their ranks that are more effective than this.

Knowing this, it should be very obvious also that they do not "throw away" SS who do less than 9 RTRs a day. They help us here out of love, so all you have to do to keep that love is to show yourself determined in advancing yourself and following their path. You don't have to constantly exhaust yourself and burn yourself out.

 

[Shael]

So I guess me having the desire for efficiency and being results-oriented all these years is a waste of time?

If you control and harness it healthily, it's a great thing. But if you overdo it and let it constantly harm yourself, then it's not just a waste of time but actually something that will actively impede your progress and advancement.

 

[ShadowTheRaven]

Flight school is pretty dope. But when I was informing myself about it I heard that new pilots are very under payed, and won't have it easy. But nothing you can fix with workings. When I was seeing if becoming a pilot was for me I knew I would always be away from my family and advancing spiritually would be more difficult, so that was a big no for me.

Underpaid perhaps, but it's something I can do for the rest of my life. I won't love it, I certainly won't hate it, all i want is a job that i don't mind doing for 40 years and then I die. I'm well aware that payment is based on experience so give me a few years as a first officer, I'll work my way up to being a Captain.

Captain Shadow...I like it.

 

[Azoun]

This is one of my flaws. I am very emotional to begin with and take things deeply to heart...

I am glad you made this because I find most of what you said very relatable about being emotional, caring about justice, and the following guilt/regret from being unable to control myself during heated moments.

I don't want to hijack this thread but I am wondering if people could elaborate more on using the air element to control emotions. I have a fire sun/water moon and lean towards those two elements but have tried invoking air a few times around 15 years ago.

Right now I am like a sponge and while it is very useful to pickup what others are feeling to understand them I tend to overreact and get very aggressive even to my wife over stupid arguments. I remember talking to Cobra in an email once where he said "Are you familiar with computer firewalls? You need a sort of said mental firewall, to avoid negativity from others." yet I haven't been able to figure out how to do that.