Meteor said:
At the rate things were going back when I was a teenager, if I had done nothing, I would have ended my life prematurely as it was profoundly unenjoyable for me back then. And now, I often find myself feeling so overjoyed, optimistic, and fulfilled,
You get the strength benefits of a man and the social benefits of appearing as a woman.
Of course not all men get the same strength benefits. You probably were one of the unlucky ones. However you are still much stronger than most women.
Also
most women get social benefits that men don't get. Emotional support is a huge one. If you show weakness as a woman, you get help. If you show weakness as a man, people try to finish you off. Women get less time for the same crime. Women get a job easier for the same qualifications (although the pay is another matter). Women get friends much easier. Women get financial support by institutions. There are no willing homeless women (they are homeless because they didn't seek help because of an inflated ego) which is not the case for men. Men are less likely to get scholarships and more likely to be thrown out at 18. I could go on.
Being a man and appearing as a woman you get the best of both worlds. Being a woman and appearing as a man... that'd be catastrophic as you wouldn't get any strength benefits while losing all social benefits as well (which most women aren't even aware of having). That's probably why there are 4 times more transgender women than transgender men.
We know all of this subconsciously and we all try to maximize our chances at procreation. You found a way to do that through deception (which also puts you at above average IQ). I believe that you have problems with people because you are trying to rationalize your cheating. Most people instinctively know what you are doing but can't put it into words.
Is deception a bad tactic to win? Maybe, maybe not.
Lets see deception in action: https://www.bitchute.com/video/amyb9hJEDQ5E/ Jake Paul appears to be going for a low hit but then goes for the head and knocks Tyrone out. Is that bad? I don't think so. That's intelligence in action.
Where am I going with this? I think that it'd be best if you stopped trying to rationalize your behaviour to others. Just say what you are and don't explain yourself.