Hello everyone, brothers and sisters. I made my dedication about last summer but since then i have had the most trouble working on my visualization. I have taken everything slow read more than experienced. I thought i should get a handle on being able to visualize colors before I go any further. every day i go into a trance, and either state affirmations, visualize, or try to get a feel for energy. my life got real messed up right after the dedication because i was living in a xian home (my aunts) and my girlfriend at the time was the one that showed my JoS which forever changed my life. Hail Satan! Hail the Four Crown Princes of Hell!
With her I wasnt as strong as I am now, she didnt want to stop cannabis and drinking at the time and i was a fool and after my dedication let myself be controlled by my feelings for her. shortly after that i moved back in with my father and she came along. not long afterwards we split up which at the time devistated my. Never having a mother around gave me some girl issues, but in all honesty after i got wrecked up and because that girl didnt give up on me as stayed as a friend, she kicked me of the issues i had with women and really matured me in that period of my life, i was a different person, a slightly strong one but subconsciously i knew i still had a long way to go, a few months being with my father. actually to be exact it was this last winter solstice she left my life. I had to then get rid of this other person i had living with me and my father. recently I retook initiative to work on myself spiritually every day. along with that, i also had to get rid of this roommate(the other guy living with me and my father) just the other day my father and i had a talk with him to give him a week or two to find a place too go. this is were im at, im following the spiritual warfare program, still practicing going into a trance to try and work on my visualization and getting a feel for energy, I have also used a candle flame to try to get a feel for one pointed concentration. Brothers and Sisters please if you have any information that will help me visualize colors *(as I cannot, except in a dream) it would be greatly helpful. I will not give up even if I do not get any answers but I know that isn't what to expect, im sure all of you are surely wise and have great knowledge.
I also might add most of my life I have smoked cannabis and as i recall it seems a little easier to visualize while im on this, is it perhaps my body is still adjusting to the metabolic turn around and the lack of cannabis in my system, ive thought this and other theories too.
also regarding my father, he is a great man, he was unfortunately raised in xianity, as it was forced onto him by his parents and he didnt know any thing else, but he had his entire life never been "into it" When i first brought up SS Spiritual Satanism and explained everything and how it tied into so much of what i believed, and how it was what i saw as the complete truth, he completely dropped any weak notation of any xian belief and became open minded to were he has been listening and understanding and embracing towards Satan and all of the Knowledge, truth, and wisdom he has given to humanity, My dad has yet to dedicate, but will once he is ready. He works so much. and I recently lost my job.
another note* I do not feel okay doing rituals as I have not consecrated anything under a full moon, and since i cant visualize color i cannot visualize blue light so i havent been able to purify any room or ritual item, my house is old. although I do bow when i wake up and when i go to sleep to all four corners, to the Four Crown Princes of Hell.
This is all individual and it is what I truly want.
Any information is Greatly helpfull!
I Live in kansas, and you may email me if you do too. (dont have too many friends) I am 19 and male.
I believe we have more power when we are together and united.
I am not giving to much information right at this moment because of the trolls and fakes in this group, but I welcome all Brother's and Sister's of our True creator god Satan.
Hail Enki / Ea / Satan!
Hail Enlil / Beezlebub!
Hail Inanna / Ishtar / Isis / Astaroth!
Hail Ashur / Azazel!
With her I wasnt as strong as I am now, she didnt want to stop cannabis and drinking at the time and i was a fool and after my dedication let myself be controlled by my feelings for her. shortly after that i moved back in with my father and she came along. not long afterwards we split up which at the time devistated my. Never having a mother around gave me some girl issues, but in all honesty after i got wrecked up and because that girl didnt give up on me as stayed as a friend, she kicked me of the issues i had with women and really matured me in that period of my life, i was a different person, a slightly strong one but subconsciously i knew i still had a long way to go, a few months being with my father. actually to be exact it was this last winter solstice she left my life. I had to then get rid of this other person i had living with me and my father. recently I retook initiative to work on myself spiritually every day. along with that, i also had to get rid of this roommate(the other guy living with me and my father) just the other day my father and i had a talk with him to give him a week or two to find a place too go. this is were im at, im following the spiritual warfare program, still practicing going into a trance to try and work on my visualization and getting a feel for energy, I have also used a candle flame to try to get a feel for one pointed concentration. Brothers and Sisters please if you have any information that will help me visualize colors *(as I cannot, except in a dream) it would be greatly helpful. I will not give up even if I do not get any answers but I know that isn't what to expect, im sure all of you are surely wise and have great knowledge.
I also might add most of my life I have smoked cannabis and as i recall it seems a little easier to visualize while im on this, is it perhaps my body is still adjusting to the metabolic turn around and the lack of cannabis in my system, ive thought this and other theories too.
also regarding my father, he is a great man, he was unfortunately raised in xianity, as it was forced onto him by his parents and he didnt know any thing else, but he had his entire life never been "into it" When i first brought up SS Spiritual Satanism and explained everything and how it tied into so much of what i believed, and how it was what i saw as the complete truth, he completely dropped any weak notation of any xian belief and became open minded to were he has been listening and understanding and embracing towards Satan and all of the Knowledge, truth, and wisdom he has given to humanity, My dad has yet to dedicate, but will once he is ready. He works so much. and I recently lost my job.
another note* I do not feel okay doing rituals as I have not consecrated anything under a full moon, and since i cant visualize color i cannot visualize blue light so i havent been able to purify any room or ritual item, my house is old. although I do bow when i wake up and when i go to sleep to all four corners, to the Four Crown Princes of Hell.
This is all individual and it is what I truly want.
Any information is Greatly helpfull!
I Live in kansas, and you may email me if you do too. (dont have too many friends) I am 19 and male.
I believe we have more power when we are together and united.
I am not giving to much information right at this moment because of the trolls and fakes in this group, but I welcome all Brother's and Sister's of our True creator god Satan.
Hail Enki / Ea / Satan!
Hail Enlil / Beezlebub!
Hail Inanna / Ishtar / Isis / Astaroth!
Hail Ashur / Azazel!
