please pardon my ignorance

[kitmorey819]

so ive been a Satanist for a very long time and most information i know is of JOS and so reading from the egroup i feel like this overload of information i've never heard of until now and i do feel a bit confused as to what to do with my life. i know about being proud of your race and trying to achieve racial purity (and staying far away from jews!) but what happens if your in an interracial marriage (im white and he's peruvian) as i am? does this mean i shouldn't have children? i also shop at wal-mart, wear make up nail polish and dye my hair and ive been reading thats a bad thing to do. and because of one of my side jobs i sometimes have to wear heavy stage makeup. AND im also a piercer and tattoo artist and in the shop i use ink from china although what ive been tattooed with on my own body is made in the usa it doesnt mean i dont already have lead in my body. then i start thinking of all the other things that could be harming me, my Satanic rosary probably has lead in it because im sure the beads i bought are probably from china and sometimes i wear it around my neck and i use contacts and glasses does the plastic damage your body? what about dish washing detergent and laundry soap and even the silverware i eat with? i feel very paranoid now i thought meditation would help protect me and i try to be in almost a constant state of meditation (driving, sitting, showering, getting ready in the morning) please help me! i feel like im a disappointment to Father now! and i really dont mean to offend anyone im here to learn!
HAIL SATAN!