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Did I ever show up in your dreams? I can guess never or yes but with a lot of shitty information about me.
And yes sorry if this is harsh. I got dreams where I succeeded in committing suicide and made lots of people feel really sad. Won’t go into further detail on what really happened for obvious reasons.
 
It’s me, Firefox, Wildfire. The guy who really went too far on hyperactive melon. It’s in my signature.

Guess I got my answers then, I’ll leave it at that.
Well if you call yourself Wildfire, then I know who you are.

But if you keep changing your name to something different that nobody has ever heard of before, then nobody will know who you are.
 
The only thing they can do is desert these practices now, or they will be going straight down. We will have a report place also for them, so they can be put on a cursing list until they are sorted out.

No longer will jews be allowed to parade or loonies defame Satan's Name, especially as we are restoring everything and they will not be allowed to initiate these disgusting processes.
Sounds awesome, I of course like to curse the enemy in general but targeted individual curses have always felt the most satisfying and I seem to be a lot better at cursing and binding than anything else, really looking forward to doing my part in this regard
 
And yes sorry if this is harsh. I got dreams where I succeeded in committing suicide and made lots of people feel really sad. Won’t go into further detail on what really happened for obvious reasons.

You deserve to live, not to die. You must seek even therapy if necessary to work these issues out (but be careful to not jeopardize very indepth information). These damages inside can be from other sources, such as early childhood etc.

Life has to be embraced step by step. Be well and remember you are worthy of life.
 
Nobody can see your signature when using a mobile device, which many people use.
Welp, they can just tap on my profile pic and go tap on the about section.

Well if you call yourself Wildfire, then I know who you are.

But if you keep changing your name to something different that nobody has ever heard of before, then nobody will know who you are.

Ah well, and what do you know of this “Wildfire” though? That’s why I changed my name twice. I needed to get rid of the stains of what I did so I can just move on. I did just more than that.

But somehow, it clicked to my mind that I want to know who the hell I was in the picture this whole time. I just want to seek total change.

Even if I did get probably signs from our gods that I can somehow still be forgiven, I wanted to find out what they meant when they had a really close friend tell me that the choice of suicide over this is going to be a “permanent end to what is temporary”.

The only thing too far about you is excessive worry and self-criticism.

You’re right. And just like what High Priest said, this is because of hang-ups I failed to walk out of.

I may succeed in getting over years of violence and abuse, but I will never wash the stains of what I did to people and what people did to me completely. It doesn’t mean I’d always stay sad but from then on stay away from triggering sources as I keep myself in check day and night.

You and Argedco seem mad at me for me feeling this way. Perhaps I should just refrain from sending anymore messages until I resolve my own state myself. If you’re both just concerned then thank you both.

Let me take a time out then.

You deserve to live, not to die. You must seek even therapy if necessary to work these issues out (but be careful to not jeopardize very indepth information). These damages inside can be from other sources, such as early childhood etc.

Life has to be embraced step by step. Be well and remember you are worthy of life.

I’m in one. I had to tell them half truths but to relay my concerns or else people will think I’m crazy. I was told by my therapist that I’m the only one who can choose to walk out of it myself or stay in my own sadness.

Well, this is hard for me. You can all talk to Argedco on what list of idiocy I did and why I’m in this dumb redemption quest. I’m not afraid of what my real sentence is going to be anymore. Whatever happens, I’ll continue walking this path even if I’m going to be alone in it from then on.

You’ll all know why I’ve been pretty suicidal and really sad until now. I HATE being a subject of degeneracy and that’s why I walked away often and thought that this was it for me.

So I walked alone until I met someone else who was suicidal too but had way worse than I did, he lived in poverty and his family hates him. I stuck with him and gave him a purpose to live by encouraging him to strengthen his talents and stick alongside me if he’s down. We ended up going places together to a writers club where he shone like a sun, and it all stated with showing my scars on my arm to prove it to him that I’m truly in the same boat as he is.

I became really good friends with him even if we didn’t really know each other online. I saved someone from killing himself, and I also found out that he was a really talented guy despite having some mental issues and nihilistic madness taking over him, but I got him to find his people. He reminded me of my younger self, and I steered him away from becoming “Wildfire”.

And here I am telling myself. Now that I know some good sides of me enough, where am I in the picture of the members of the JoS? Where was this cursed “Wildfire”, “Firefox432” or also known as the redemption seeker “Kitsunebi” who may not know that he has been redeemed already?

In Argedco’s dreams, I guess “Wildfire” is either a dumb clown, in jail or in a body bag. I can’t tell but he can, and I thought he’d tell me who I was in his dreams so I’d have some enlightening insight in trying to improve.
 
In Argedco’s dreams, I guess “Wildfire” is either a dumb clown, in jail or in a body bag. I can’t tell but he can, and I thought he’d tell me who I was in his dreams so I’d have some enlightening insight in trying to improve.

Why would I think about you being in jail or in a body bag? I have never thought of either of those things for you, and I have no reason to. I also don't understand why you think I would hate you.

You are somebody who lives on the opposite side of the planet from me. I don't know you personally, and all I know about you is some few things you have written over the years. I have absolutely no reason to hate you. I have never hated you and I have never disliked you. There are just some things that you choose to do that I don't like, but the reason I don't like these is because they are unhealthy for your life and have lead to your life being worse, so I wish you would have a better life by removing your bad habits.

You seem to be begging to know what my opinion about you is. I don't know you personally and I don't know enough about you to have a strong opinion in any way. But I can say the same thing that I've said before. It looks like you think of yourself like the main character in an anime cartoon, and you have unrealistic expectations on how you expect everybody to relate with you. Because in an anime cartoon there is always conflict and problems and fighting between different groups, you have often tried to purposefully place yourself into the center of arguments or conflicts in your life so you could be like the anime protagonist who is in the center of all of these problems. When many or most of the conflicts you have described here before, those problems were unrelated to you or were not about you until you inserted yourself into the center of the conflicts, when maybe it started as a smaller conflict between other seperate people and you weren't even involved at first.

You are not an anime character. You are not the main character for all television plots or all situations in the world to be focused on yourself. Stop inserting yourself into the middle of other people's problems or other people's conflicts. Just simply live your life, do your work, and do the things that you are responsible for. You are not the protagonist or antagonist of every problem in the world. Nobody is against you and nobody is your enemy. You just have to live your life, like the other 8 billion people who are focused on living their lives.


My dreams were general and symbolic about the work being done to educate and uphold Humanity. I have not had a specific or detailed dream about each individual of the several thousand registered users here. The dream was specifically about the school being built and created by High Priest Hooded Cobra and High Priestess Lydia, and those are the only 2 specific names that were mentioned. There was a general feeling of the good work for humanity that is being done by the prominent members here, without any specific names being thought of.

The other dream about the party/meeting. The reason I thought about Stormblood is because he is very strict and careful about a healthy diet and never having anything unhealthy, so I was wondering what the food and drinks would be if he is there. Then Aquarius's name was mentioned because it is a simple and easy to remember name, and because both of them are Italian. I was worried about whether I would be able to get to the meeting on time or if I would miss it, and I thought if these 2 people are coming all the way from Europe, then I might be able to get there because I'm going a much shorter distance. That is the total extent of the details of my dreams about anybody specific. Their names were only mentioned one time for a couple seconds, then they were not mentioned again. The dream was really about High Priestess Lydia putting together this public meeting, and wanting to give back something nice for us all.
 
Why would I think about you being in jail or in a body bag? I have never thought of either of those things for you, and I have no reason to. I also don't understand why you think I would hate you.

You are somebody who lives on the opposite side of the planet from me. I don't know you personally, and all I know about you is some few things you have written over the years. I have absolutely no reason to hate you. I have never hated you and I have never disliked you. There are just some things that you choose to do that I don't like, but the reason I don't like these is because they are unhealthy for your life and have lead to your life being worse, so I wish you would have a better life by removing your bad habits.

You seem to be begging to know what my opinion about you is. I don't know you personally and I don't know enough about you to have a strong opinion in any way. But I can say the same thing that I've said before. It looks like you think of yourself like the main character in an anime cartoon, and you have unrealistic expectations on how you expect everybody to relate with you. Because in an anime cartoon there is always conflict and problems and fighting between different groups, you have often tried to purposefully place yourself into the center of arguments or conflicts in your life so you could be like the anime protagonist who is in the center of all of these problems. When many or most of the conflicts you have described here before, those problems were unrelated to you or were not about you until you inserted yourself into the center of the conflicts, when maybe it started as a smaller conflict between other seperate people and you weren't even involved at first.

You are not an anime character. You are not the main character for all television plots or all situations in the world to be focused on yourself. Stop inserting yourself into the middle of other people's problems or other people's conflicts. Just simply live your life, do your work, and do the things that you are responsible for. You are not the protagonist or antagonist of every problem in the world. Nobody is against you and nobody is your enemy. You just have to live your life, like the other 8 billion people who are focused on living their lives.


My dreams were general and symbolic about the work being done to educate and uphold Humanity. I have not had a specific or detailed dream about each individual of the several thousand registered users here. The dream was specifically about the school being built and created by High Priest Hooded Cobra and High Priestess Lydia, and those are the only 2 specific names that were mentioned. There was a general feeling of the good work for humanity that is being done by the prominent members here, without any specific names being thought of.

The other dream about the party/meeting. The reason I thought about Stormblood is because he is very strict and careful about a healthy diet and never having anything unhealthy, so I was wondering what the food and drinks would be if he is there. Then Aquarius's name was mentioned because it is a simple and easy to remember name, and because both of them are Italian. I was worried about whether I would be able to get to the meeting on time or if I would miss it, and I thought if these 2 people are coming all the way from Europe, then I might be able to get there because I'm going a much shorter distance. That is the total extent of the details of my dreams about anybody specific. Their names were only mentioned one time for a couple seconds, then they were not mentioned again. The dream was really about High Priestess Lydia putting together this public meeting, and wanting to give back something nice for us all.
I see now. I guess it’s just me who’s too bothersome with people.

It is my fault for letting my observing nature get mixed up with making up assumptions of people too much that it can become ungrounded. I’m too cautious over my actions and my surroundings because it had to do with my childhood of being the target of rumors and other lies stirred about me, and it formed a dumb conclusion within me that I better be more watchful of my surroundings to make sure no more lies spring up behind my back. I no longer wanted to be an outcast or joke again, or even a physical abuse victim and that’s what I lived with back then.

And why do I want to be in the center of things still? I’ve seen a positive side to it that I can start positive movements for people without any negative interventions needed, grow a community of friends and become a figure of inspiration to other people just by being who I am. I just do well in school and sometimes at work and I get friends who look at me as a smart person. And here I am figuring this out, as long as I’m able to stop myself from overreacting and over-analyzing situations I will succeed in life.

I realized that I’ve also found my way of uplifting and healing souls from degenerate behavior, to make them far more improved individuals as long as I kept a positive and empowered soul, I can visualize and see souls of people feel better around me and think clearer. I won’t however let that take over me too much, I get it. I just have to live my life without putting myself at the center of things, as if there are guns pointed around me 24/7.

Now I see, now I realize it all now. Thank you for telling these to me.

P.S. Mainstream anime is shit. I like wolf brigade or genocidal organ and I wish there was a whole ass animated movie of it.
 
I see now. I guess it’s just me who’s too bothersome with people.

It is my fault for letting my observing nature get mixed up with making up assumptions of people too much that it can become ungrounded. I’m too cautious over my actions and my surroundings because it had to do with my childhood of being the target of rumors and other lies stirred about me, and it formed a dumb conclusion within me that I better be more watchful of my surroundings to make sure no more lies spring up behind my back. I no longer wanted to be an outcast or joke again, or even a physical abuse victim and that’s what I lived with back then.

And why do I want to be in the center of things still? I’ve seen a positive side to it that I can start positive movements for people without any negative interventions needed, grow a community of friends and become a figure of inspiration to other people just by being who I am. I just do well in school and sometimes at work and I get friends who look at me as a smart person. And here I am figuring this out, as long as I’m able to stop myself from overreacting and over-analyzing situations I will succeed in life.

I realized that I’ve also found my way of uplifting and healing souls from degenerate behavior, to make them far more improved individuals as long as I kept a positive and empowered soul, I can visualize and see souls of people feel better around me and think clearer. I won’t however let that take over me too much, I get it. I just have to live my life without putting myself at the center of things, as if there are guns pointed around me 24/7.

Now I see, now I realize it all now. Thank you for telling these to me.

P.S. Mainstream anime is shit. I like wolf brigade or genocidal organ and I wish there was a whole ass animated movie of it.

I'm happy that you found a good and healthy way to use your skills or personality traits for something good. It looks like you are doing better now and improving compared to several months ago. Just stay on the track that you are already on and you are doing good.
 
I am understanding it all now.

I’m somewhat like you Argedco, or maybe not, someone who wanted to see people get better, someone who created in the first place because he wanted people to unite over something. But not entirely.

I didn’t like people making a mess of this forum back then and now I realized that I was using a flamethrower for a simple problem when all it needed was a small bit of advice for the person. I was becoming as bad as the forum trolls and I swore that if I find myself becoming one I’d kill myself.

In regards with me wanting to show up in people’s lives, I never wanted anything hideous coming out of it. I didn’t want a problem in my society spiraling into something that could get worse, it’s somewhat a dumb instinct in me to get involved if things could become really shitty for anyone involved, I regret going too far to insulting someone over his condition because I thought he was trolling.

I’m someone who also wanted to get rid of a hideous past that way, someone who doesn’t want to see his former evil self again. Someone who has grown so sick and tired of this world’s sadness and rot. No this ain’t any anime shit this time, now I found my reasons again to stay around here, to study and learn until he finds a feasible and realistic way to get majority of mankind back on its feet from its long years of kike occult oppression, the source of it all. I hate xtianity reeking around my environment, here in Philippines, A LOT. I hate the kike influence in this world, and it drove me to be a radical Satanist before and I hate myself for it.

I am driven by big goals, but I know to work small steps like with what business plans do. I have seen blood, I have seen fist-fights, I have seen people become completely broken shells of their former human selves over small beefs. Sorry for the times I get too careless that I overstep actions that cause me instability, where I seem to be madly driven, the upsides of it is that I at least produced results for my communities with sacrifice of my mental stability. Why the hell did I not learn to apply the power of calmly walking away yet, as in, it’s very effective for dumb situations that can’t be turned around at all.

You know what? Maybe I should literally tell this to myself too, not everyone in the world can be saved. Some people are best to be left to rot away if they deserve it.
 
I'm happy that you found a good and healthy way to use your skills or personality traits for something good. It looks like you are doing better now and improving compared to several months ago. Just stay on the track that you are already on and you are doing good.
Yeah you’re happy and all. Thanks. I owe it to wanting to run away from my hideous past and it looks like I am.

P.S. Somebody better make a pro-national socialist anime that would be serious, really educational to warn people of kike ideologies and philosophical like wolf brigade, ghost in the shell(fuck SAC) and genocidal organ.
 
On a side note, I hate being called Wildfire, it gives me shitty vibes to my degenerate cringy past.

Your past has nothing wrong with it. Everyone will do some mistakes. You are severely critical of yourself. Instead you should practice self forgiveness for what you perceive as errors from your past.

Start also eliminating self harmful language. Attacking yourself verbally will not help you. You have not committed any negative acts against nobody as far as anyone here is concerned. So all this negativity against yourself is also unfounded.

Forum mistakes is not something not everyone has committed. Stop trying to justify this ill hostility you show to yourself over the forum or the state of the world. Start embracing yourself slowly, because you are not an evil person, because if you were, you would never be offended by the things you describe.

Start cultivating your own goodness within, do not engage in self punishing manners like these. Again, nothing wrong has been committed.

Look also at how people care for you and understand that both these people and the Gods love you, but in order to receive this love, you have to also give yourself a break from all this incessant self punishing criticism. Give yourself a little break and remind yourself you love them. Then you will start having more resolve and calmness to proceed with your future, everything will start looking better.

As far as I am concerned you are on a very good trajectory of self transformation, so pat yourself in the back and congratulate yourself a bit. No more mean words against yourself from now on, when they are not really deserved or followed by actual mistakes.

Anger will calm down also when you stop projecting anger to the world and to yourself. People are as they are, but more anger is not going to change that. Instead when you learn to value and appreciate yourself, you can extend this also on others. That's a better and more way to heal anger and resentment, not via this method of self punishment.

Best of luck to you.
 
Greetings everyone in our family,

As the outreach project advances, there will be the creation and maintenance of Joy of Satan Official Social Media.

We will announce these all into a list, when these are solidified. Then, everyone will know what is from us and what is not. Before the topic here, I want to also thank everyone who is doing their part for Spiritual Satanism to reach it's deserved status. Thank you!

These will be directly under us and entrusted individuals, who will run these only on the interest of the Gods and the Joy of Satan. They will be official and trusted. These will allow interaction between people and the Joy of Satan, but in a proper manner, without any individual ego driven situations and in a high standard.

All translations of all the Languages, will also have their own dedicated social media, which will be used for these purposes, as we expand further worldwide.

In the past, there has been the case that many people created fan-groups and other similar things. No wonder, some were created out of good volition and good intents.

If you have been doing honest work, there is nothing to worry about. Send us the links and we will index, boost and promote the social media, which will have to be under the original Joy of Satan from now on. Operators of these can actually get an official position in the Outreach project also, with their work recognized and accepted by the whole community. There will be organization that will take place, to ensure maximum impact.

There is also another topic here, however. While this could in some cases have a good intent in some cases, such as to promote the Joy of Satan, it turns out in the end that many of these are not honest or good.

That involves the striking majority. People building these also make subterranean acts that do not reflect Spiritual Satanism and they do not have honest intents, as such, while they use the Joy of Satan or the Gods as a front, are actively working to undermine bonds of trust and do erosive work such as that of the enemy.

They "self appoint" as leaders, misguide people, and generally this causes a net loss for Satan's souls and people's progression. Running a social media account for promotion would not be bad, but other lines have been crossed and we are aware of this. This topic angers the Gods to a severe level, which if people who do this knew, they would stop immediately. That is no different in many cases from actual enemies, no matter how these people try to rationalize the topic.

People here in the past have cited their intentions: Translations, spreading the message, or "bringing people to the Gods". That is only one part of this.

Like the intent to create a bakery for people to eat, but one does not follow hygienic standards, let alone communicate with anyone on the central Nation to build a bakery, or adding bad food where they see fit, that is not a bakery, that is something that must be closed down. Those of good intent will understand why this line is set. The importance here is not for one to feel like a baker, but for one to be a baker that does the work properly, so that people can eat. It's the only way this could happen.

Helping to "bring people in", while these are not really ending up in the Joy of Satan, or under proper knowledge, or when there is even a complete misdirection, is not proper course. It is a bad end representing net loss. Even if these received 50,000 people, but 49800 do not make it anywhere, numbers do no matter either.

This process is therefore not reflective of work that must happen, but other intents, which oftentimes appear when one gets deeper on the existence of these and how they behave, or why they start behind the JoS's back to begin with.

Cases are all the time observed where they do the following:

1. They are below standard, painting the Joy of Satan in a bad light. This can be highly detrimental. People might demean, shout or engage in public warfare while using the Joy of Satan as a mask and only this, without real respect or real connection to the Joy of Satan. That is enemy behavior. It can lead to abuse and the loss of interested people, due to poor performance.

2. They create other smaller cults, which serve particular interests and misguide people. We have been informed there are also cases where these people try to take advantage of others through these, while simultaneously misdirecting them away from the Joy of Satan.

In many cases albeit they steal or try to take advantage of the Joy of Satan teachings, or my own, they work in oppositional interest to that of the Joy of Satan or other forms of particular interests not reflecting the progress of our side.

That is equal to a jew or an enemy. This angers the Gods, as this dissuades people from Spiritual growth.

3. The above can cause unnecessary division, which is another thing the Gods do detest, as people are severed from the purity of the central source, which is always observed by the whole of the Spiritual Satanist community, constantly evaluated, and where our core is.

For that reason, those who engage in theft, using the Joy of Satan as a proxy, taking information while simultaneously disgracing the Joy of Satan or the Gods, or those who harm people due to their own ignorance for their own fulfillment, are going to be dealt with.

The first layer is there will be a clear separation. The second layer will be that we will take these down unless they are officially handed to the Joy of Satan, since they steal our content. Thirdly, there will be other measures taken for this process.

Unfortunately, if one does engage in these, this is not our responsibility. They aren't from here or anything, or from us.

Lastly if anyone has been conned by any of these characters, do contact us with the necessary information. They oftentimes will tell people to not do this, but you should do this immediately and leave it all.

Stay close to the Joy of Satan and the Gods and don't allow people to confuse you. If they were good they wouldn't tell you all these strange things, openess would be the approach.

-High Priest Hooded Cobra 666
This is great news, mean simply has no words :)(y)
 
In all I have tried to do, and all I will ever attempt to do or help with in any way, I will ensure to follow these standards and strive to achieve absolute excellence in these as I have done with my current project of translating rituals; much work needs to be spent on each one to ensure the accuracy and effectiveness of each one, I take that very seriously. Precision is essential in all that I do. I'm sure as well as to pass any actions like these through those who are directly in charge. I haven't been made aware of such, but if I have done anything to upset anyone, I apologize sincerely, and will strive to do nothing but better. And should I misstep in the future, I'd like to be made aware of such, no fluff, case and point, and will reform myself accordingly.

I love this organization, truly. It quite literally saved my life, gave me the tools to purge myself of a plague of curses on my existence. I only want to to good for this place, and these people, and myself. Which is why I do my best to direct as many of those I know will fit the bill of service to the Gods and benifit from the mass of information that has been compiled. And hell, Cobra, you're my fucking hero man. I don't get these people, these cultists and deviators. It's fucking mental to me that this has been going on. Yet still. I'm not surprised. The enemy is truely relentless in their antics, I'll give them that.

Everybody wants to be important in some way, and some people get spiteful or diluted by their false pride, yeah? It's absolutely pathetic and detestable, but I know the faults of my fellow man, I know them too well. I feel a little sorry for them, even a little ammused; pride and belief in one's self is integral, but there's a happy medium between being prideful and humble that kind of needs to be maintained, one needs to know their place, and some people loose sight of that I think, and that's when these cults and deviations form.

And of course, you have the ones who where deviants from the start, seeking to seed doubt and fracture our Holy Mission. For them, I have nothing but contempt and animosity. Occasionally, one must purge the bad rotten fruit and dying branches from the trees in their orchard, and collect that which is bountiful. Suppose this is exactly just that, eh. That's how I see it, anyway.

That's why I only teach what I know to those who I know are meant for this path, being careful not to expose myself to the enemy. I always point them directly to the site for more and to show where I learned these things, or use it directly as teaching material . I speak nothing but gloriously and with affection for all involved. In fact, I've, managed to convert a fair few people who I'm close to, including family members; often they call me the "expert" and I need to humbly remind them I'm only barely adept, and that I still have much to learn and a long way to grow myself. It's the best I can do in my service at this moment in time, even if I plan and dream for the future, I still know where I am right now, where I need to be, and that each piece will come to fruition as it is meant to. I am as patient as the ancients, as I like to say. No problem in waiting for just the right moments, that's how precision works. And I really, really favor being precise. :devilish:

I'm glad to hear that many trustworthy outlets have already formed and immediately interwound their roots with the mother tree. It's just victory after victory, as hard as the enemy tries! I've been going through a small depressive phase the passed few days, it'll pass, but it's something I still deal with occasionally, you can't get cursed as hard as I was without having to heal some serious left over wounds. This part brought my spirits up quite a bit. This place does that quite a bit for me like that, I find. Ever a positive influence on every scale. Cheers! ;)
 
I just had a dream this morning that we had our own school. It was a building in a city, like 5 or 6 floors high and each floor was pretty small. But there were many doors on each floor, with each room focused on a specific subject or topic. There was one room for creating and displaying art works. I remember this, because some new member had an artwork he wanted to share so I was telling him he can share and display it in that room.

Each room was focused on a specific type of spiritual skill or advancement, or a specific area of historical knowledge, or working with a specific language.

I was walking through the building, walking through all of the floors and up the stairs to the next ones. And seeing all the rooms being finished. Some were open and being used, but work was still ongoing finishing them all like painting all the walls and bringing in the supplies. I was walking through the school with High Priest Hooded Cobra and High Priestess Lydia, and some other people. And we were very proud of our work to build this new school.

_____________________


Before this, also this morning I had a dream that High Priestess Lydia made a post saying she wanted to have a public meeting/party for our members. In a place that is several hours drive away from me, but still nearby in my area of the world. And I was worried about if I would be able to get there. Somehow I ended up there. It was a small restaurant with Lydia, Aquarius, Stormblood, and several other people who I didn't know their names. Maybe 20 people.
I'd like to say, this is very interesting to me that you've had this dream, because I actually have had so many thoughts of a similar place too, so many in fact it's become one of my goals to work towards the implementation of an institution like this. It's a beautiful dream, and I hope one day soon we can make this a reality. I wonder who you've seen in this dream...makes me wonder if I'm one of those you didn't know! :sneaky:

Thank you so much for sharing this. It's so invigorating to hear I'm not the only one "dreaming" about this (I quote because I don't dream in the same ways as others, my mind refuses to sleep anymore :ROFLMAO:).
 
Your past has nothing wrong with it. Everyone will do some mistakes. You are severely critical of yourself. Instead you should practice self forgiveness for what you perceive as errors from your past.

Start also eliminating self harmful language. Attacking yourself verbally will not help you. You have not committed any negative acts against nobody as far as anyone here is concerned. So all this negativity against yourself is also unfounded.

Forum mistakes is not something not everyone has committed. Stop trying to justify this ill hostility you show to yourself over the forum or the state of the world. Start embracing yourself slowly, because you are not an evil person, because if you were, you would never be offended by the things you describe.

Start cultivating your own goodness within, do not engage in self punishing manners like these. Again, nothing wrong has been committed.

Look also at how people care for you and understand that both these people and the Gods love you, but in order to receive this love, you have to also give yourself a break from all this incessant self punishing criticism. Give yourself a little break and remind yourself you love them. Then you will start having more resolve and calmness to proceed with your future, everything will start looking better.

As far as I am concerned you are on a very good trajectory of self transformation, so pat yourself in the back and congratulate yourself a bit. No more mean words against yourself from now on, when they are not really deserved or followed by actual mistakes.

Anger will calm down also when you stop projecting anger to the world and to yourself. People are as they are, but more anger is not going to change that. Instead when you learn to value and appreciate yourself, you can extend this also on others. That's a better and more way to heal anger and resentment, not via this method of self punishment.

Best of luck to you.

Thank you sir, I’d rather live a lonely life being able to meditate and uplift my soul than be stuck around with people who think I’m immensely depressed just because I just want to stay out of the light.
 
Thank you sir, I’d rather live a lonely life being able to meditate and uplift my soul than be stuck around with people who think I’m immensely depressed just because I just want to stay out of the light.
I just can’t take noisy environments after all, it will just put me back in the times I was the target of cruel people over and over and over.

Some people will think I’m crazy about me taking the ultra-hermit path but this is the best I can do with my situation. I can’t be in many places at once. I can’t command entire crowds but a limited group of people in my life with respect to their individualities.

I shouldn’t have chosen to reach out to the world, I should have found another and better way to prove myself forgiven.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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