vaporeddreams_
Member
- Joined
- Feb 22, 2024
- Messages
- 135
I am still a bit ashamed to say that my journey with Satan had started off on a wonky start. I had originally found about Satanism of social media, and that had averted me from learning about the truth of Satanism. Only after a user had told me about JoS, had I truly begun to understand what Satanism was about. But, the problem does not lay here. The problem and cause of my stress is in the fear that I am not meditating or seeing myself to the full potential. I know that meditation takes time and effort, and that I should never push myself too far.
It sometimes feels as if Im faking all this, that subconsciously I am not truly ready to be fully committed due to my young and immature mind. This though stresses me out as I do not want to seem ungrateful for all that Satan has given me. Thanks to him, I no longer have the same feeling of depression and such, but I still have a guilt for not always meditation and putting all my available efforts into advancing. This all gnaws at my mind every day, and it stresses me out more, on top of school and family issues.
I am here to listen to all of you and take in any suggestions for help. There is harsh truth that I must face before truly advancing and I am willing to listen. I truly want to show my strength and not give up. Thank you all so much and HS!
It sometimes feels as if Im faking all this, that subconsciously I am not truly ready to be fully committed due to my young and immature mind. This though stresses me out as I do not want to seem ungrateful for all that Satan has given me. Thanks to him, I no longer have the same feeling of depression and such, but I still have a guilt for not always meditation and putting all my available efforts into advancing. This all gnaws at my mind every day, and it stresses me out more, on top of school and family issues.
I am here to listen to all of you and take in any suggestions for help. There is harsh truth that I must face before truly advancing and I am willing to listen. I truly want to show my strength and not give up. Thank you all so much and HS!