Re: I want to Die.

[veronikasmith]

Hi, brother.
As a fellow dedicated Zevism, who is doing what they should-and from your posts, it appears you are putting forth effort- I care. So here's at least one person who does. We don't know each other, and don't have to. I know that much about you, and that is enough. You are a valuable person and I care about you. I don't believe that people come here by mistake-at least not the ones who dedicate, etc. I'm not talking about ones looking to sell their soul or something. I believe there is something unique about the soul of each one here dedicated and putting forth effort like yourself.
These things you strive for in life, keep going after them. Work towards them daily, even if it isn't a whole lot. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. We will help you along the way. I too have had posts with very few or no replies, and have found that making myself more specific usually helps.
I also recommend studying astrology. Really look at your own natal chart. Look at some others, too. You mentioned how you witness people with good lives who do not deserve them. Look at their chart, you may be surprised why their lives are the way they are and you will also discover that everyone has a Saturn, misfortune, no exceptions. Looking at other's charts brought me a lot of peace. There was a popular girl at my school who seemed to have everything. Wealth, beauty, friends, male admirers, nice clothes because of the wealth and even a big boob job because of it too. And at a young age. She reminded me of Regina George from Mean Girls. Her mom reminded me of Mrs George, too in looks and in letting her daughter get a boob job so young which is something I could see her doing. "I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
Anyways, I looked at her chart. It was flooded with aspects for beauty and love and some for wealth too. I remember saying, "it's just HER." And it helped me not be so jaded and jealous that I wasn't popular and covered in Gucci. It wasn't that I'm an undesirable person, but fate gave her a boost. But you know what? That has been just about the extent of her life. Nothing BUT shopping at the mall, getting fucked and being something to look at. Her life is shallow. Her chart was covered in things most covet, but was so sided towards that, that she has nothing else in life. And some day she will get old too and her looks will fade. Her life will start to really seem empty.
Speaking of astrology, you know what's good about being Zevism and having knowledge? You can correct what you don't like in your chart. Make fate your bitch.
Another thing. There are planetary aspects such as the house and sign of your Saturn which can bring loneliness. Also if you have any planets in your twelfth house, it can bring it on too. Find out so you can 1.get some peace and /or understanding of why things are how they are and 2. Make whatever it is your bitch and fix it.
One more thing! It sounds like much of how you feel could be from and enemy attack, or bad planetary transits(check). Both have much of the same protocol. Cleaning, protecting, banishing, keeping your energies up, etc.
Please keep in mind the importance of regular ritual to feel closer to Satan.

 

[Ron Brown]

  Hi, brother.
As a fellow dedicated Zevism, who is doing what they should-and from your posts, it appears you are putting forth effort- I care. So here's at least one person who does. We don't know each other, and don't have to. I know that much about you, and that is enough. You are a valuable person and I care about you. I don't believe that people come here by mistake-at least not the ones who dedicate, etc. I'm not talking about ones looking to sell their soul or something. I believe there is something unique about the soul of each one here dedicated and putting forth effort like yourself.
These things you strive for in life, keep going after them. Work towards them daily, even if it isn't a whole lot. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. We will help you along the way. I too have had posts with very few or no replies, and have found that making myself more specific usually helps.
I also recommend studying astrology. Really look at your own natal chart. Look at some others, too. You mentioned how you witness people with good lives who do not deserve them. Look at their chart, you may be surprised why their lives are the way they are and you will also discover that everyone has a Saturn, misfortune, no exceptions. Looking at other's charts brought me a lot of peace. There was a popular girl at my school who seemed to have everything. Wealth, beauty, friends, male admirers, nice clothes because of the wealth and even a big boob job because of it too. And at a young age. She reminded me of Regina George from Mean Girls. Her mom reminded me of Mrs George, too in looks and in letting her daughter get a boob job so young which is something I could see her doing. "I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
Anyways, I looked at her chart. It was flooded with aspects for beauty and love and some for wealth too. I remember saying, "it's just HER." And it helped me not be so jaded and jealous that I wasn't popular and covered in Gucci. It wasn't that I'm an undesirable person, but fate gave her a boost. But you know what? That has been just about the extent of her life. Nothing BUT shopping at the mall, getting fucked and being something to look at. Her life is shallow. Her chart was covered in things most covet, but was so sided towards that, that she has nothing else in life. And some day she will get old too and her looks will fade. Her life will start to really seem empty.
Speaking of astrology, you know what's good about being Zevism and having knowledge? You can correct what you don't like in your chart. Make fate your bitch.
Another thing. There are planetary aspects such as the house and sign of your Saturn which can bring loneliness. Also if you have any planets in your twelfth house, it can bring it on too. Find out so you can 1.get some peace and /or understanding of why things are how they are and 2. Make whatever it is your bitch and fix it.
One more thing! It sounds like much of how you feel could be from and enemy attack, or bad planetary transits(check). Both have much of the same protocol. Cleaning, protecting, banishing, keeping your energies up, etc.
Please keep in mind the importance of regular ritual to feel closer to Satan.

[/QUOTE]

 

[adept mage]

Death is NOT the solution these problems.The only way out is through life.Learn how to transform pain into power like I have.
www templeofzeus.org  
In the name of Satan!!

  I feel like nobody cares. Satan doesn't care, the Gods don't even care.I feel so alone and ignored and I cant take the desolation anyone. I got mad about  2 years ago and asked Satan to either destroy me or help me. I'm still here, but nothing has changed. Nobody cares about the person who has feelings and cares about other Satanists. If another Satanist is going through hard times, I would try my best to help them. But when I'm having bad things happen, I get nothing. Why is that? Why was I born into this world to become a Zevism and try my best at it, only to get shut down. Why whenever I ask for a sign from Satan bad things happen? I'm not jewish. I sit and daydream sometimes about having a home of my own, my own wife and children, seeing the smiles on their faces, but then reality slaps me awake. I'm so poor and broken, an ugly wreck. There are people in life that do horrible things and they seem to be the happiest people. Why? Why was I meant to become a Satanist and why was I drawn to Satanism so much? Did Father Satan see something good in me? Why was I chosen to be a Satanist?I just want a normal life and be happy like everyone else.I admit that I'm not happy with the life ive been given, and the body I have.but I'm still alive to try and empower myself so I don't fade away into nothing. The sad part is: I feel like I'm doing it alone. I have not had any contact wth demons. I have not had any contact, or heard Satan's voice before. I want everything to end.I'm sick of living without life. I had told Father Satan that if someone, or some demon could tell me that I'm doing fine, that's all I need. I would become powerful and I wouldn't have worry anymore. I would know that I'm not alone anymore. but as always, Nothing Happens. Just like this topic, it'll probably get ignored again and fade into nothing.

[/QUOTE]

 

[devilsAdvocate Nic]

Here's a word of advice from a person who is from the exact place that you are in right one. Am a very kind, giving and caring soul,  so I always expected that much, or even less... But at least some from the people around me. I imagine you rr not going to like what I tell you...

If people around you do not love you,  then love your self. I dnt know how that sounds....hopefully not rude, but just take it for what it is... I tried so hard, I pushed so much for people to like me by doing so much good... Some times absurd en ridiculous things and other times I turned into a clown just to entertain them, but...
It was always a but... Until father told me to stop.
Stop seeking for there love and attention... He told me if I had not realized it by then,  then he would lay it down straight for me. He told that am better off on my own, that I should embrace the loneliness and wear it as shield. It wasnt easy, but I did just that en trust me I have never been happier my entire life. Am not telling you to I isolate your self from the world, thats not exactly what I did. I just stopped investing my time in figuring out how to make people happy, to knowing how to make myself a happy and better person. Instead of waiting for people's help,  and care.... I cared for myself. If people around you dnt like you, trust me, and face it,  there's something about you that tunes that attitude from them towards you. Am not saying there's something awful about you, cause it might even be something good that tunes them off... If you know how gud can easily turn or seem bad.
In my case it was some type of desperation for love,  attention and approval.  Whenever I got a friend I wrapped myself upon the person like a leach and I would suffocate the person.... With my kindness, and care and I would give my all until it would seem wiered. And some where along those lines I expected that much in return... Which was never the case. The person instead too my kindness for weaknesses,  until my devotion as a friend seemed pathetic. I have just graduated from college as a fine art teacher,  so we have a staff room,  but I don't remember ever trying to make friends, I mind my business all day,  I smile from a distance, and I never ever go to start a pointless conversation with anyone. I dnt seek attention,  love or approval, but believe me when I tell you am the centre of attention. Am the golden girl everyone wants to talk to, but I dnt have much to say and it makes them curious,  both men and women. NB
If you want the people around you to love you then... Definitely start by loving yourself. And by loving yourself I mean take care of yourself. If you dnt like your body the freaking do something about it...
Dnt force yourself on them, you will only get hurt. I cud write about this all day,  but I hope from my few lines you pick something useful. Just love yourself and care for yourself... One last thing,  very very important - clean and empower your aura. That's very important right there...for a lot of reasons,  but we'll,  one thing at a time. Hail Satan
Hail all hell Devils advocate nic Dark blessings 



  Hi, brother.
As a fellow dedicated Zevism, who is doing what they should-and from your posts, it appears you are putting forth effort- I care. So here's at least one person who does. We don't know each other, and don't have to. I know that much about you, and that is enough. You are a valuable person and I care about you. I don't believe that people come here by mistake-at least not the ones who dedicate, etc. I'm not talking about ones looking to sell their soul or something. I believe there is something unique about the soul of each one here dedicated and putting forth effort like yourself.
These things you strive for in life, keep going after them. Work towards them daily, even if it isn't a whole lot. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. We will help you along the way. I too have had posts with very few or no replies, and have found that making myself more specific usually helps.
I also recommend studying astrology. Really look at your own natal chart. Look at some others, too. You mentioned how you witness people with good lives who do not deserve them. Look at their chart, you may be surprised why their lives are the way they are and you will also discover that everyone has a Saturn, misfortune, no exceptions. Looking at other's charts brought me a lot of peace. There was a popular girl at my school who seemed to have everything. Wealth, beauty, friends, male admirers, nice clothes because of the wealth and even a big boob job because of it too. And at a young age. She reminded me of Regina George from Mean Girls. Her mom reminded me of Mrs George, too in looks and in letting her daughter get a boob job so young which is something I could see her doing. "I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
Anyways, I looked at her chart. It was flooded with aspects for beauty and love and some for wealth too. I remember saying, "it's just HER." And it helped me not be so jaded and jealous that I wasn't popular and covered in Gucci. It wasn't that I'm an undesirable person, but fate gave her a boost. But you know what? That has been just about the extent of her life. Nothing BUT shopping at the mall, getting fucked and being something to look at. Her life is shallow. Her chart was covered in things most covet, but was so sided towards that, that she has nothing else in life. And some day she will get old too and her looks will fade. Her life will start to really seem empty.
Speaking of astrology, you know what's good about being Zevism and having knowledge? You can correct what you don't like in your chart. Make fate your bitch.
Another thing. There are planetary aspects such as the house and sign of your Saturn which can bring loneliness. Also if you have any planets in your twelfth house, it can bring it on too. Find out so you can 1.get some peace and /or understanding of why things are how they are and 2. Make whatever it is your bitch and fix it.
One more thing! It sounds like much of how you feel could be from and enemy attack, or bad planetary transits(check). Both have much of the same protocol. Cleaning, protecting, banishing, keeping your energies up, etc.
Please keep in mind the importance of regular ritual to feel closer to Satan.

 

[Lupita]

I've been in your position. I was depressed, thinking about going to die. I searched for suicides articles on the internet, and arranging how myself going to die. Everyone I asked for help, seemed like doesn't care, I feel I'm on my own, my life is useless and I shall die for being such a burden.But theen, I started power meditation. You can check on Satanic page on jos for the kinds of power meditation. Or simply just did the 40'days challenge by Zevios Metathronos. Make journals, don't skip your meditation. I promise you will feel different. Satan always help you, but if you refuse to listen to his help, then it is useless. Start power meditation asap!Hail Satan!

Sent from my iPhone

[/QUOTE]

  Here's a word of advice from a person who is from the exact place that you are in right one. Am a very kind, giving and caring soul,  so I always expected that much, or even less... But at least some from the people around me. I imagine you rr not going to like what I tell you...

If people around you do not love you,  then love your self. I dnt know how that sounds....hopefully not rude, but just take it for what it is... I tried so hard, I pushed so much for people to like me by doing so much good... Some times absurd en ridiculous things and other times I turned into a clown just to entertain them, but...
It was always a but... Until father told me to stop.
Stop seeking for there love and attention... He told me if I had not realized it by then,  then he would lay it down straight for me. He told that am better off on my own, that I should embrace the loneliness and wear it as shield. It wasnt easy, but I did just that en trust me I have never been happier my entire life. Am not telling you to I isolate your self from the world, thats not exactly what I did. I just stopped investing my time in figuring out how to make people happy, to knowing how to make myself a happy and better person. Instead of waiting for people's help,  and care.... I cared for myself. If people around you dnt like you, trust me, and face it,  there's something about you that tunes that attitude from them towards you. Am not saying there's something awful about you, cause it might even be something good that tunes them off... If you know how gud can easily turn or seem bad.
In my case it was some type of desperation for love,  attention and approval.  Whenever I got a friend I wrapped myself upon the person like a leach and I would suffocate the person.... With my kindness, and care and I would give my all until it would seem wiered. And some where along those lines I expected that much in return... Which was never the case. The person instead too my kindness for weaknesses,  until my devotion as a friend seemed pathetic. I have just graduated from college as a fine art teacher,  so we have a staff room,  but I don't remember ever trying to make friends, I mind my business all day,  I smile from a distance, and I never ever go to start a pointless conversation with anyone. I dnt seek attention,  love or approval, but believe me when I tell you am the centre of attention. Am the golden girl everyone wants to talk to, but I dnt have much to say and it makes them curious,  both men and women. NB
If you want the people around you to love you then... Definitely start by loving yourself. And by loving yourself I mean take care of yourself. If you dnt like your body the freaking do something about it...
Dnt force yourself on them, you will only get hurt. I cud write about this all day,  but I hope from my few lines you pick something useful. Just love yourself and care for yourself... One last thing,  very very important - clean and empower your aura. That's very important right there...for a lot of reasons,  but we'll,  one thing at a time. Hail Satan
Hail all hell Devils advocate nic Dark blessings 

  Hi, brother.
As a fellow dedicated Zevism, who is doing what they should-and from your posts, it appears you are putting forth effort- I care. So here's at least one person who does. We don't know each other, and don't have to. I know that much about you, and that is enough. You are a valuable person and I care about you. I don't believe that people come here by mistake-at least not the ones who dedicate, etc. I'm not talking about ones looking to sell their soul or something. I believe there is something unique about the soul of each one here dedicated and putting forth effort like yourself.
These things you strive for in life, keep going after them. Work towards them daily, even if it isn't a whole lot. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. We will help you along the way. I too have had posts with very few or no replies, and have found that making myself more specific usually helps.
I also recommend studying astrology. Really look at your own natal chart. Look at some others, too. You mentioned how you witness people with good lives who do not deserve them. Look at their chart, you may be surprised why their lives are the way they are and you will also discover that everyone has a Saturn, misfortune, no exceptions. Looking at other's charts brought me a lot of peace. There was a popular girl at my school who seemed to have everything. Wealth, beauty, friends, male admirers, nice clothes because of the wealth and even a big boob job because of it too. And at a young age. She reminded me of Regina George from Mean Girls. Her mom reminded me of Mrs George, too in looks and in letting her daughter get a boob job so young which is something I could see her doing. "I'm not like a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
Anyways, I looked at her chart. It was flooded with aspects for beauty and love and some for wealth too. I remember saying, "it's just HER." And it helped me not be so jaded and jealous that I wasn't popular and covered in Gucci. It wasn't that I'm an undesirable person, but fate gave her a boost. But you know what? That has been just about the extent of her life. Nothing BUT shopping at the mall, getting fucked and being something to look at. Her life is shallow. Her chart was covered in things most covet, but was so sided towards that, that she has nothing else in life. And some day she will get old too and her looks will fade. Her life will start to really seem empty.
Speaking of astrology, you know what's good about being Zevism and having knowledge? You can correct what you don't like in your chart. Make fate your bitch.
Another thing. There are planetary aspects such as the house and sign of your Saturn which can bring loneliness. Also if you have any planets in your twelfth house, it can bring it on too. Find out so you can 1.get some peace and /or understanding of why things are how they are and 2. Make whatever it is your bitch and fix it.
One more thing! It sounds like much of how you feel could be from and enemy attack, or bad planetary transits(check). Both have much of the same protocol. Cleaning, protecting, banishing, keeping your energies up, etc.
Please keep in mind the importance of regular ritual to feel closer to Satan.

 

[alpha one]

I'll give u a small advice...keep increasing ur witchpower aka bioelectricity

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