Hello Brothers and Sisters
I made my dedication about a year ago and in my regard and ignorant youth it took me about a years time to get my life together, get away from drugs(I was experimenting with a lot of heavy, and always smoking pot like and oz every few days), and the negative influences certain people had in my life.
I know how bad this is, and how badly its affected my ability to see colors and the overall fact of having a healthy brain.
I am now down to one person(he is an addict and is one who is without) living with me that I have already given them a deadline to get out of me and my fathers house. (he is trying to drag out his stay as long as possible of course)
I was wondering, since I am not very psychically aware enough (it seems this way because I havent ever experienced anything of the astral or seen or even felt Father Satan) , and I am not sure if it has to do with past life/lives of spiritual degradation, or what. But I am very lonely, to the point of breaking down. i don't want to sound weak, but I have always been sort of an emotional person.. I have made a few rituals to our Father Satan, in thanksgiving to all he has provided to my life, and to our Kind and to such a great biological father he has given me.
(my father dropped his beliefs and is studying JoS, soon he will dedicate when he has time, since he is working all the time{he wants to make it at the right time} Really is a great person treats me more as a best friend that a son.)
I do not know if I have a Guardian Daemon, or who she or he is, I have read a lot and its about patience. Waiting for them to come to you.
I meditate on trying to see my chakras and cleaning them and my aura ect. It seems to be very difficult for me to visualize and the more i study and learn the more i realize everything is about good foundations, which i really extremely lack.
I started going to Martial Arts again and i have started eating healthier, a lot healthier, completely cold turkey-ed Everything and haven't gone back. suffered a few withdrawals but that pain is nothing ( i mean pathetically nothing) compared to the hole i feel inside myself for not being able advance myself or to feel Father Satan or to help him in ways i read others doing here on the groups.
Should I go ahead and try vibrating my third eye? To hopefully open up some awareness and the ability to see colors?
I might want to add this so i can make it seem more clear.
I know the first stages of visualization i need to visualize by recalling a thought(such as the thought of red), like if i was recalling a memory, but even this is extremely difficult to me and in most cases is all a complete blur. with absolutely no color.
It makes cleaning my aura feel like its not working or doing anything at all. I have tried using 'tools' such as the sun or a bright light, but the same result comes out from it.
I really want to do something for Father, anything. there are a lot of old churches randomly here in the country, i one day had the urge to molotov it down to the ground. leaving no evidence, there at least I could do something for Father Satan, even if it wasn't something Spiritual maybe i could do something physical?
I am pretty lost, but have not given up hope. I wont give up ever, and I continue to try and go into a trance state to state affirmations and to try to visualize everyday atleast twice
this may sound silly, but i feel as though I need just a hug from our Father.
Maybe what i need too, is a real friend.
I understand its near impossible to know who is really 4 our Father Satan if you lack spirituality like i do. But i feel as though I need to say this anyways...
I have a very large home. and I am alone all the time *by alone i mean in my room away from my drug addicted roommate that soul reeks(not that i even can tell it reeks, but he is such a horrible person, took my girl that showed me JoS from me and turned her into a willing slave, and also provoked my when i was at my weakest to really hurt my puppy, which i still havnt forgiven myself nor him for.)*
For the last few years everyone i have had at my house was a horrible person addicted and deluded and utterly stupid.
long story short, I AM getting rid of him for good. but then will be faced with the problem of being alone all the time without even a spirit to talk too...
For once in my life I would like to have someone worthy at my home, I know most of you already have a home, but I post this not only because I could really use a friend and a greater influence in my life... but maybe there is a Brother or Sister out there or both, that really need a place to stay. and ofcourse it would be rent free.
Hail Satan!!!!!!
Hail Beezlebub!!!!!!
Hail Astaroth!!!!!!
Hail Azazel!!!!!!
Hail all the Powers of Hell!!!!!!
Glory and Protection be to all Dedicated Warriors of our True Creator and Father Satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I made my dedication about a year ago and in my regard and ignorant youth it took me about a years time to get my life together, get away from drugs(I was experimenting with a lot of heavy, and always smoking pot like and oz every few days), and the negative influences certain people had in my life.
I know how bad this is, and how badly its affected my ability to see colors and the overall fact of having a healthy brain.
I am now down to one person(he is an addict and is one who is without) living with me that I have already given them a deadline to get out of me and my fathers house. (he is trying to drag out his stay as long as possible of course)
I was wondering, since I am not very psychically aware enough (it seems this way because I havent ever experienced anything of the astral or seen or even felt Father Satan) , and I am not sure if it has to do with past life/lives of spiritual degradation, or what. But I am very lonely, to the point of breaking down. i don't want to sound weak, but I have always been sort of an emotional person.. I have made a few rituals to our Father Satan, in thanksgiving to all he has provided to my life, and to our Kind and to such a great biological father he has given me.
(my father dropped his beliefs and is studying JoS, soon he will dedicate when he has time, since he is working all the time{he wants to make it at the right time} Really is a great person treats me more as a best friend that a son.)
I do not know if I have a Guardian Daemon, or who she or he is, I have read a lot and its about patience. Waiting for them to come to you.
I meditate on trying to see my chakras and cleaning them and my aura ect. It seems to be very difficult for me to visualize and the more i study and learn the more i realize everything is about good foundations, which i really extremely lack.
I started going to Martial Arts again and i have started eating healthier, a lot healthier, completely cold turkey-ed Everything and haven't gone back. suffered a few withdrawals but that pain is nothing ( i mean pathetically nothing) compared to the hole i feel inside myself for not being able advance myself or to feel Father Satan or to help him in ways i read others doing here on the groups.
Should I go ahead and try vibrating my third eye? To hopefully open up some awareness and the ability to see colors?
I might want to add this so i can make it seem more clear.
I know the first stages of visualization i need to visualize by recalling a thought(such as the thought of red), like if i was recalling a memory, but even this is extremely difficult to me and in most cases is all a complete blur. with absolutely no color.
It makes cleaning my aura feel like its not working or doing anything at all. I have tried using 'tools' such as the sun or a bright light, but the same result comes out from it.
I really want to do something for Father, anything. there are a lot of old churches randomly here in the country, i one day had the urge to molotov it down to the ground. leaving no evidence, there at least I could do something for Father Satan, even if it wasn't something Spiritual maybe i could do something physical?
I am pretty lost, but have not given up hope. I wont give up ever, and I continue to try and go into a trance state to state affirmations and to try to visualize everyday atleast twice
this may sound silly, but i feel as though I need just a hug from our Father.
Maybe what i need too, is a real friend.
I understand its near impossible to know who is really 4 our Father Satan if you lack spirituality like i do. But i feel as though I need to say this anyways...
I have a very large home. and I am alone all the time *by alone i mean in my room away from my drug addicted roommate that soul reeks(not that i even can tell it reeks, but he is such a horrible person, took my girl that showed me JoS from me and turned her into a willing slave, and also provoked my when i was at my weakest to really hurt my puppy, which i still havnt forgiven myself nor him for.)*
For the last few years everyone i have had at my house was a horrible person addicted and deluded and utterly stupid.
long story short, I AM getting rid of him for good. but then will be faced with the problem of being alone all the time without even a spirit to talk too...
For once in my life I would like to have someone worthy at my home, I know most of you already have a home, but I post this not only because I could really use a friend and a greater influence in my life... but maybe there is a Brother or Sister out there or both, that really need a place to stay. and ofcourse it would be rent free.
Hail Satan!!!!!!
Hail Beezlebub!!!!!!
Hail Astaroth!!!!!!
Hail Azazel!!!!!!
Hail all the Powers of Hell!!!!!!
Glory and Protection be to all Dedicated Warriors of our True Creator and Father Satan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!