Meteor
New member
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2025
- Messages
- 2
I was wondering, is it safe or possible for me to practice Zevism if I'm prone to hallucinations?
I've heard voices since I was little, one of which I thought for years was a Goddess. I also had delusions, like that I was a "vampire" or something, or about "gender". But I got help, and apparently there's something called dissociative identity disorder; it turned out my confusion about myself, and my hallucinations, were all symptoms of that. So, as the doctor recommended, I avoided stress and worked towards something called "integration". Thanks to that, my memory improved, and I became able to properly accept myself, instead of developing delusions to circumvent buried trauma and fear.
I still have an inner dialogue, rather than inner monologue; but instead of switching between thinking I'm just one of the voices at any given time, I realized all of the voices are just parts of my own mind, and got better at compromising with myself. Thanks to that, I'm less prone to thinking in extremes, or falling into delusions, or losing sight of who I actually am.
Lately, I was wondering: when I pray to a God or Goddess, and I hear answers, isn't that also just a part of my own mind replying? Is it still possible for me to form a genuine connection with the Gods despite that? If hearing voices is just mental rather than a spiritual thing, then how does having a meaningful connection work for people who are actually spiritually advanced?
Also, I'm deeply sorry for the embarrassing ways I conducted myself in the past, if anyone is unfortunate enough to remember that. I was young and naive and mentally ill, but most of all I regret how it affected the people around me. Even so, I missed my spiritual family here, and I believe I'm able to do better now. Dedication is forever, after all.
I've heard voices since I was little, one of which I thought for years was a Goddess. I also had delusions, like that I was a "vampire" or something, or about "gender". But I got help, and apparently there's something called dissociative identity disorder; it turned out my confusion about myself, and my hallucinations, were all symptoms of that. So, as the doctor recommended, I avoided stress and worked towards something called "integration". Thanks to that, my memory improved, and I became able to properly accept myself, instead of developing delusions to circumvent buried trauma and fear.
I still have an inner dialogue, rather than inner monologue; but instead of switching between thinking I'm just one of the voices at any given time, I realized all of the voices are just parts of my own mind, and got better at compromising with myself. Thanks to that, I'm less prone to thinking in extremes, or falling into delusions, or losing sight of who I actually am.
Lately, I was wondering: when I pray to a God or Goddess, and I hear answers, isn't that also just a part of my own mind replying? Is it still possible for me to form a genuine connection with the Gods despite that? If hearing voices is just mental rather than a spiritual thing, then how does having a meaningful connection work for people who are actually spiritually advanced?
Also, I'm deeply sorry for the embarrassing ways I conducted myself in the past, if anyone is unfortunate enough to remember that. I was young and naive and mentally ill, but most of all I regret how it affected the people around me. Even so, I missed my spiritual family here, and I believe I'm able to do better now. Dedication is forever, after all.
