Mini rant with my mom

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Second Update

Now i'm grateful for the advice and all but now i'm feeling even more suicidal and feel like giving up cause now even though i downloaded 3 relationship/sex apps one of them literally being Tinder as per the advice of my Therapist and got some likes here and there so i guess they at least want to have sex with me maybe not a relationship but the problem now is and i don't know if i revealed it before is i don't feel like i'm even allowed to ever have relationships, sex, my own feelings or thoughts without having to believe what ever my parents or other people say even when i do my hobbies and other stuff i want to do i NEVER feel happy or anything it just seems pointless to me also while Master is right about being independent how the hell can i possibly be independent in the United States where i live its just so fucking expensive and i only have a few thousand saved up and i would lose it all if i get an apartment now unless i find some place that scales with income and of course i have autism mainly Asperger's so i possibly could get housing help with that i just don't know where to look and becoming independent now seems very difficult what with kikes are doing to the world and biDUMB ruining the United States more which is where i live so theres that.

so what should i do how do i feel like being able to control my mind and feel the way i want about stuff without accepting every NPCs opinion and evil ways also most of my family is unfortunately getting the vaccine to travel even though i told my mom now isn't a good time for that what with all the stuff going on.

You need a good job to be able to pay the rent for a flat on your own. One cannot live alone because is very difficult and risky.

Stay with your family and grow professionally, physically, spiritually and so on and after a few years you will see with your family what to do for relationship and family.

Now don't think any more about love and relationships. Don't do sexual repression because it is wrong, sick and harmful. Masturbate a few times a week to keep your prostate healthy.

its true i need a good job especially with all the job openings across the united states i just don't want to take the kike vaccine also i'm not sure i can stop thinking about about love and relationships maybe i can partially stop cause i distract myself ALOT after all i was thinking once i drive to use those apps and see whats its like i already downloaded them and i was simply following the advice of my therapist but yes i understand the financial concerns and like i said there is an area of cheap apartments that scales with income that is made so that could work for me its where on of my friends lives but yes its not easy for me to think i'm "not allowed" to have sex wasn't feeling that way this morning thankfully so its all in my mind. and yes i do masturbate usually once a day or every other day though you want me to stop thinking of love and relationships until i'm stable for a partner am i right

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Second Update

Now i'm grateful for the advice and all but now i'm feeling even more suicidal and feel like giving up cause now even though i downloaded 3 relationship/sex apps one of them literally being Tinder as per the advice of my Therapist and got some likes here and there so i guess they at least want to have sex with me maybe not a relationship but the problem now is and i don't know if i revealed it before is i don't feel like i'm even allowed to ever have relationships, sex, my own feelings or thoughts without having to believe what ever my parents or other people say even when i do my hobbies and other stuff i want to do i NEVER feel happy or anything it just seems pointless to me also while Master is right about being independent how the hell can i possibly be independent in the United States where i live its just so fucking expensive and i only have a few thousand saved up and i would lose it all if i get an apartment now unless i find some place that scales with income and of course i have autism mainly Asperger's so i possibly could get housing help with that i just don't know where to look and becoming independent now seems very difficult what with kikes are doing to the world and biDUMB ruining the United States more which is where i live so theres that.

so what should i do how do i feel like being able to control my mind and feel the way i want about stuff without accepting every NPCs opinion and evil ways also most of my family is unfortunately getting the vaccine to travel even though i told my mom now isn't a good time for that what with all the stuff going on.

You need a good job to be able to pay the rent for a flat on your own. One cannot live alone because is very difficult and risky.

Stay with your family and grow professionally, physically, spiritually and so on and after a few years you will see with your family what to do for relationship and family.

Now don't think any more about love and relationships. Don't do sexual repression because it is wrong, sick and harmful. Masturbate a few times a week to keep your prostate healthy.

also i forgot to add i really don't like masturbation its fucking boring and unsatisfying which is why i obsess over relationships and love and downloaded those three apps cause i'm trying to make this a reality and complete one of the few true life goals i have other than hobbies also i refuse to take the covid kike vaccine which is why i'm not really seeking other jobs cause in the united states which i live i m ight be forced to take it for "work" which they won't pay enough compensation anyhow in the form of LIVING WAGES which is one of the things i want.

also when will financial matters change in the United States which is where i live.

 

[Sunny]

Be responsible when you drive, don't get distracted because you are putting your life and the lives of others at risk.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Be responsible when you drive, don't get distracted because you are putting your life and the lives of others at risk.

thats true thank you although i thought you were gonna say something about the apartments that scale with income plus is there a way to be independent without me waiting years to do so if i do that ill probably be 35 and by then i wouldn't want a relationship at all period.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

i'm sorry if i bothered and made everyone feel uncomfortable with my personal life stories and experiences i was just so frustrated especially sexually frustrated and scared to drive which is holding me back

 

[Sunny]

Be responsible when you drive, don't get distracted because you are putting your life and the lives of others at risk.

thats true thank you although i thought you were gonna say something about the apartments that scale with income plus is there a way to be independent without me waiting years to do so if i do that ill probably be 35 and by then i wouldn't want a relationship at all period.

Even if renting a flat is not very expensive, there are other expenses too. See concretely if you can support yourself, if not, don't waste your money and that of your family.

It seems more reasonable to be patient and then live well instead of being impatient and ruining yourself and living badly.

 

[Saturn666]

i don't think i wanna do anal sex but i do wanna do frottage, oral sex on both sides, mutual masturbation and rubbing my dick on a womans breasts and vagina i just don't want a penis in my ass i don't want to risk bleeding and its kinda weird to me.

Didn't you say you were attracted to penis and men?

well yes but is anal sex the main thing or something does that have to be done?

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

 

[Soul Wings]

Obligatory "I'm not a doctor or a psychologist this is just my fucking opinion"
Circumcision is mutilation by definition. The argument that it is more hygienic is false if you just wash your penis properly, it's not that hard. Pun intended.
I do wish it could be completely banned, but I digress that is not happening so....I personally believe people should decide when they're older and have a functioning brain if that's what they want to do. If they want to self mutilate, that's on them.


As for your sexuality, you're overthinking. You know the answer, it's within you. You have the tools and means to experiment if you want that. Think about it, would you regret not knowing at 80, if you even get there? Simply do what you want while you can, if you can, with consent and SAFELY. If you need to do it discretely to be safe, then do it discretely. People do what they want in secret regardless of their religion all the time.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Didn't you say you were attracted to penis and men?

well yes but is anal sex the main thing or something does that have to be done?

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

i never said anal sex was wrong i was just saying am i required to do it if i was with a man was what i was saying cause in the past i used to for about a month or 2 straight put one or two of my fingers in my anus and i didn't really like it at all it felt weird somewhat hurt and i started to bleed ever so slightly so it bothered me and thats why i don't try this anymore so i'm worried/afraid that if a penis was in my ass that it would bleed and i don't want that but i'm not against anal sex i'm not religious as in abrahamic.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Obligatory "I'm not a doctor or a psychologist this is just my fucking opinion"
Circumcision is mutilation by definition. The argument that it is more hygienic is false if you just wash your penis properly, it's not that hard. Pun intended.
I do wish it could be completely banned, but I digress that is not happening so....I personally believe people should decide when they're older and have a functioning brain if that's what they want to do. If they want to self mutilate, that's on them.


As for your sexuality, you're overthinking. You know the answer, it's within you. You have the tools and means to experiment if you want that. Think about it, would you regret not knowing at 80, if you even get there? Simply do what you want while you can, if you can, with consent and SAFELY. If you need to do it discretely to be safe, then do it discretely. People do what they want in secret regardless of their religion all the time.

i'm only against forced circumcision cause it was done to me as an infant thats why i want it illegal.

and i don't want to have a first partner when i'm 35 or 40 i want this sometime before than the only people who like me that way are on Tinder or Grindr not in real life i just have several friends one who i wanna cut off for several reasons causes hes not a good friend caused me emotional problems and cause even though he never said it wouldn't be interested in having sex with me despite him hypocritically getting his dick sucked by a man as my second post reveals and claiming he hates men but loves women despite also having gay dreams in the past.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Be responsible when you drive, don't get distracted because you are putting your life and the lives of others at risk.

thats true thank you although i thought you were gonna say something about the apartments that scale with income plus is there a way to be independent without me waiting years to do so if i do that ill probably be 35 and by then i wouldn't want a relationship at all period.

Even if renting a flat is not very expensive, there are other expenses too. See concretely if you can support yourself, if not, don't waste your money and that of your family.

It seems more reasonable to be patient and then live well instead of being impatient and ruining yourself and living badly.

the place that i was looking at doesn't just scale with income they also help pay at least one of the utility bills and my dad said he would help pay if need be look i just wanna be independent in one or two years max hopefully so by the time i'm 30 31 ill be independent so maybe i can seek out a real relationship with some or just have sex either way i don't care i just don't wanna live with my parents and be a virgin its pathetic. and yes the virgin thing alongside being circumcised is making me going insane why do you think i downloaded Grindr and Tinder i was tired of people only wanting to be friends with me and no i never asked anyone for a date or anything like that.

 

[Sunny]

Obligatory "I'm not a doctor or a psychologist this is just my fucking opinion"
Circumcision is mutilation by definition. The argument that it is more hygienic is false if you just wash your penis properly, it's not that hard. Pun intended.
I do wish it could be completely banned, but I digress that is not happening so....I personally believe people should decide when they're older and have a functioning brain if that's what they want to do. If they want to self mutilate, that's on them.


As for your sexuality, you're overthinking. You know the answer, it's within you. You have the tools and means to experiment if you want that. Think about it, would you regret not knowing at 80, if you even get there? Simply do what you want while you can, if you can, with consent and SAFELY. If you need to do it discretely to be safe, then do it discretely. People do what they want in secret regardless of their religion all the time.

I'm against mutilation but there's more here.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Infibulation

 

[Sunny]

Didn't you say you were attracted to penis and men?

well yes but is anal sex the main thing or something does that have to be done?

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

Are you sure it is useful and necessary to stimulate the prostate through anal penetration? For example, ejaculation is useful for the prostate because in this way the prostate gets rid of toxins and bacteria and therefore the so-called prostatic stagnation is avoided.

However, the health of this gland as well as the rest of the organism does not depend only on one thing but on a combination of things and therefore on a healthy and natural lifestyle.

 

[Sunny]

Didn't you say you were attracted to penis and men?

well yes but is anal sex the main thing or something does that have to be done?

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

well yes but is anal sex the main thing or something does that have to be done?

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

 

[Henu the Great]

Anal sex is not something wrong or dangerous, the only risk is sexually transmitted diseases.
It is not like vaginal sex, in the sense that vaginal sex takes place more "naturally" because the vagina is particularly elastic and lubricates itself, consequently straight couples who avoid vaginal sex and only do other practices are quite rare.
With anal sex it is a different matter, the anus is less elastic and does not lubricate itself, which is why there is a need for more time and preparation for anal penetration.
But apart from physiological reasons, some, men or women, straight or gay, can like anal sex as well as not, while others have psychological problems for which they refuse anal sex when they might like it instead, see for example moral reasons, religious, afraid of pain, or some men think it automatically makes you homosexual (even if they put a finger in the anus by a woman!).
However, anal penetration does not necessarily have to take place with the penis, you can also use only one or two fingers, you can also not penetrate but caress the external part of the anus with your finger or tongue (always pay attention to possible diseases), o you can use sex toys / objects of various kinds (with caution)
In any case, when you are a beginner with this practice, it can take many weeks to get your anus used to getting something inside without pain.
It must be said that it is the absolute best practice for prostate health.
So you decide what to do, but make sure it's what you really want to do.

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

your right if i focus too much on something like limitations its happens right also you really didn't answer my questions

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

i really don't like masturbating and seeing the scar

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

i feel i have to apologize for causing such drama about my personal life if everyone hates me i understand i'm sorry for causing such retarded problems sorry i made everyone feel uncomfortable

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

Humanity is freeing itself from jewish limitations and lies, the only question about anal sex is whether that practice is appropriate for the anatomy of the anus.

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

i take it you didn't want to answer my questions and felt uncomfortable if so i'm sorry

 

[Henu the Great]

i doubt i'll ever be able to free myself from jewish limitations cause i feel its wrong for me to get my dick sucked by a man so i guess it will never happen and hell i originally didn't want a partner cause i only wanted to have sex once a month with a prostitute or a hook up but i guess that was dumb of me hell i really don't like masturbating i don't like seeing that circumcision scar on my penis its VILE and now i'm thinking of barely eating food but i usually overeat anyhow. i don't know why everyone wants to control what i think. also i'm not waiting six years to be independent i'll be 35 by then too late to start anything let alone lose my virginity.

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

i really don't like masturbating and seeing the scar

You can do healing meditations to heal yourself of the mental trauma.

What was the question you wanted to ask?

 

[Crystallized Mushroom]

You have an engine that can go speed of light, and beyond. What you are doing here to yourself that you set some imaginary limitation, and therefore your performance is throttled. You can overcome limitations. Say it to yourself, and keep repeating it. Thus, it happens.

i really don't like masturbating and seeing the scar

You can do healing meditations to heal yourself of the mental trauma.

What was the question you wanted to ask?

the question was the paragraph you responded to by saying engine of light

 

[Ninetailedfox]

Hopefully a mental healing working will help you get through your problem with your scar but i encourage you to masturbate with affirmations. I always say an affimation before i start masturbating and right before or while im ejaculating. Use the energy from your orgasm. This makes masturbation a bit more useful instead of feeling like a waste of time. I use it for money so it helped guide me to what I needed to know and attracted some opportunities here and there but I'm sure my personality is what got in the way of me making a good amount or recurring amount. I was met with so many different methods but didnt have the patience for most of them and kept switching around (the methods aligned with my natal chart and so did my personal "limitations" which are not limitations they are just obstacles to overcome). Anyways i think it works but other things need to be worked on regarding the personality. In your case if you're just looking for a good job then you should affirm your getting hired somewhere that will
Pay your bills. You can make your own affirmation.

Look at your natal chart specifically the 2nd, 6th and 10th house as well as your chart ruler. It sounds like you just got out of your Saturn return as well.

I'm confused if you really want to be with a man or woman but I knew a couple that were both male and tops. So if you can find someone like that you can just masturbate together, do whatever and be romantically involved until you feel comfortable enough with him to explore. Although psychological healing will change your sexual circumstances.

 

[Henu the Great]

i really don't like masturbating and seeing the scar

You can do healing meditations to heal yourself of the mental trauma.

What was the question you wanted to ask?

the question was the paragraph you responded to by saying engine of light

As you meditate, gain understanding of Universe around you and of yourself, heal yourself and so on, these things will be solved.