Re: Warning, testimony and help

[[email protected]]

Could you please stop turning in circles and get to the point ?

All your story in one sentence : "I have been a satanist for five years and I messed up horribly so now I feel like shit because the Gods don't want me anymore, but I won't give you any more details"

 

[Little Wolf1]

Hey, did you do void meditation? I'm sorry but it looked like you're imagining things up. Satanism is not for the elite. Satan and His Demons are very patient. 


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On Sunday, September 3, 2017, 7:14 AM, pinkteabunny@... [JoyofSatan666] <[email protected] wrote:

  Tldr, what do I do when I don't have anymore chances? I can't just leave Satan. I refuse to..I HAVE made progress over the year. But it's still not enough.. I just advance slower that most. But I always learn in the end. I am so frightened right now. I'm not going to leave Satan no matter what. But I've made so many mistakes and I feel they don't want me anymore even though I am sencere as I possibly can be.

Satanism is for the elite. I don't want to be kicked out of Satanism because of the mistakes I've made.. that kind of behavior is not welcomed, but I know I have what it takes to change. I know I do.

 

[[email protected]]

Your probably being attacked by the enemy. Have you kept up with your Aura of Protection? I have episodes where I go into uncontrollable rage, following by unimaginable misery. I believe its either an enemy attack, or Father Satan testing my faith. Could be the same for you. I have read in so many posts and sermons by members that the gods never leave us, even when we turn our backs on them. Father Satan is very understanding and knows us all. Your determination to stay through all of this is very honorable, and I believe Father Satan loves honor bound warriors the most. Your probably being attacked by the enemy because of the amount of RTR's your doing. Your completely wrecking them and causing them insanity, and they know this, I'm not talking about just the jews, I'm talking about the enemy angels and reptilians too. So they probably sent some kind of 'thoughtform' after you which is causing all this worry. Stay strong, keep fighting, and never surrender. The fact that your suffering right now is just a reminder of how desperate our enemies are now. Your powerful. As are all creations of Satan.Don't give up, I believe Satan has not left you. He has never left anyone unless they want him to. I read something somewhere, I cant remember where, but it said: "I will only leave, if you yourself ask me to." -SatanIt pains me to see a brother/sister in misery and being attacked. I hope this uplifts you and keeps you positive."WHEN TEMPTATION COMES, I GIVE MY COVENANT TO HIM THAT TRUSTS IN ME." -Satan"I AM EVER PRESENT TO HELP ALL WHO TRUST IN ME AND CALL UPON ME IN TIME OF NEED." -Satan
Stay Strong, Shine Bright, and Hail Satan!

 

[shiningsloth666]

Ok first of all I've never heard nor seen Satan or other Gods/Godesses.
I can't speak for them nor ever will but the part where you say they ''don't want to go on'' 
or that The Powers of Hell judge it's too late feels really weird to me.

-Have you succesfully opened your clairaudient senses?
-Have you been lacking in your meditation program. ( Missing day(s) )
-Can you reckon when you create and empower a negative thoughtform that will progressively
create more hangups as you keep feeding it?

It's only been half a year or so since I dedicated but reading your post I am almost certain there's
a lot of delusion in what you're talking about (And that's kind of a good thing in the situation you describe IMO.)

Void meditating is really important when it comes to (everything really) deal with thoughtforms. 
You get more in touch with how you feel so whenever it's negative thinking you cut if off.
Affirming ''you are no more'' , destroying with satanic blue fire, even using AGNI I you feel like so.
There really is a lot of ways many more than the few exemples I displayed. 

Spiritual Satanism is also about becoming more and more self-suffiencient.
Also, I remember the ending sentence of a post on the JOS(.org) page HPS Maxine wrote:
''But, we must work at it and through knowledge, NEVER FEAR!''
It's been awhile since I read those 2 words but they struck me like thunder!
Since that time I never did nor ever will fear anything. Fear is now a vague souvenir.
I can sense danger, be surprised, creeped out and even feel threatened sometimes like when I get attacked but NEVER AFRAID.

Like last night, I made that creepiest nightmare ever. I felt so overwhelmed by energy.
I was completely in a state of shock. But my mind still as a calm lake. 
Energy was bursting through me and in that nightmare I went head on
straight to that ''thing'' that was threatening even if I could feel the imminent danger. 

When I came face to face with it. Inside me it felt like an explosion. But I was still, in a letting go mode.
Still, focused, no resistance whatsoever. The feeling lasted a second or two but it was so intense
almost unbearable. At that moment I wasn't feeling my body it's like if I was struck by lightning.
The feeling itself was not negative simply too much overwhelming but the situation was very negative in itself.

After those 2 seemingly infinite seconds I immediately woke up and I could sense this threat in my room. 
I quickly banished it with satanic blue fire for 1-2 minutes but I'm not yet that good at visualization.
I decided to get out of bed, eat a thing and then I cleaned my aura, recited a few SURYAE, affirmations. 
5min after I woke up I wasn't feeling threatened no more. My point is, even when I was certain that this ''thing''
was close to me trying to rip my energies I never feared. Also, I didn't focus on it.
I filled the whole place with satanic blue fire as best as I could and kept the focus inward as I always do all day.

Most of the times. The enemy influences I consciously experience comes through thoughtforms/hangups.
Ä lot of those are created by myself. Now I can quickly recognize these hangups in the seed and destroy them.
Yesterday was clearly not my doing I can tell.
The de-programming of the Jewish Matrix goes really deep. 

To be calm and not afraid is the state you want to be in.
Sometimes ''being positive'' is something people have not really learnt or in the wrong way.
Be comfortable, be ''neutral'', objective. Comfortable is positive.
Being objective means you will wield your thoughts & emotions instead of getting carried by them.
Void meditation is something I do almost 24/24h.
Sometimes I fiddle with thoughts, create songs in my head or reflexions but they're always positive because
when they're not, I cut them off in a heartbeat. Bam! Like you turnoff a radio as HPS Maxine wrote.

Most of the time, even when there's something in my head that is not negative at all I cut if off anyway.
You'll see as you experience Void meditating a lot you'll surely prefer to remain in that state most of the time.
That way the mind is always ''ready''. Sharp as a laser when you then focus it on whatever it is.

Even being dedicated since less than a year I must I say I have practiced Void meditation
almost every day all the time since 4years or so.
I guess even being ''without'' I understood the importance and the beneficialness of it.^-^ 

Do what feels best for you. Get in touch with yourself. Let your intuition blossom.
Best is never negative. Also, try as best to never lack in your meditation routine.

I would be really curious about you eloboration on the ''too late'' response. If it's about your advancement
I really can't believe it but maybe it's about something more specific you forgot to mention.
Anyway, I hope my reply can be of help and I'm looking  forward to yours. 

You must understand the importance of self-sufficiency.
Like you said, you are a SS to the ''heart'' and soul and will never give up. 
Do it for yourself, keep showing respect to Satan and the Gods.
In the end, if they don't approve of you they will surely let you know 
( Which I personally believe is remotely impossible if you act as a true SS all the way. 
Every Gentiles has a place in Satan's kingdom and has been given the ability to advance him/her-self.
You are you own savior because He gave this ability to each and all of Us as a gift.
Claim your birthright and never let go of it.
Sanata Dharma(Spiritual Satanist) is the real and only Natural way of life.
Unless you are Jewish, there's is no other way to live.
You can always pretend and stagnate but there's no getting out of these Universal Laws.
Simply attuning forever more with the Eternal Truth, Satyan! )

Hail Father SatanHail all the beautiful Gods and Godesses of Hell Hail the Powers of HellHail all my fellow SS brethren and all those on Satan's sideSieg Heil ! Sieg Heil ! 卐

 

 

[kieithnightmare0]

Sorry that's a bad habit I need to get rid of. But I don't want to release too many details publically because I don't feel it's appropriate.

 

[kieithnightmare0]

You all are so kind thank you!!! I have been doing 2 aura of protection workings, and I've added a third one recently. I have been struggling a bit with void meditation but I've been trying to practice that efficiently. It's just that IF a God were to talk to me during, I wouldn't want to ignore them.

My clairaudience points aren't open all the way. But I can hear small phrases, bits and pieces of a scentence or full words if I focus. And regarding that, I hear A LOT of "?????? with you" and other things that cut off. Like I can't hear the words before those so I don't know if they're positive or negative. It could be "what's with you" or "I'm done with you" or "I'm with you" like... i just don't know and I don't feel any positive or negative energy when I hear those. I'll keep advancing myself so that could change. In the beginning of the year I couldn't hear as much as I can now.

A few days ago after I meditated I heard something along the lines of "just accept it" and I felt it was in regards to me not being accepted anymore. I also got a lot of mixed messages which could of been the enemy. In that specific meditation, I also heard "Nazi" followed by postitive gold energy. And a few other things.
But I don't want to vilify the Gods or Satan if they're not the ones doing the negative stuff.

Again I'm sorry that the given details of my specific problem are so vague. But I would really rather keep that private.

 

[[email protected]]

In my ignorance of 'what you did', you sound like a christian who is shitting their pants for breaking "the unforgivable 'sin'" which is "blasphemy against 'the holy spirit'", which makes it impossible for "all-powerful", "all-able" "god" to forgive you (which is a contradiction).

As quoted, Satan said He won't leave you. Satan also said, I think to HPS Maxine directly, that They reincarnate Souls until the Soul understands and advances, eventually, so as to escape the wheel of karma. You have the tools to free yourself, as well. The more you dwell on something, the more power you give it, and the more you draw it to yourself; if it is an enemy thoughtform fucking with you, then that is designed and intended to harm y, so feeding it makes it much stronger. You have to IGNORE it, with the only exception being to do workings for protecting yourself and doing banishing. Don't say/think to it, "Lol. Idiot. You'll never win", or give power about thinking about ignoring it; just IGNORE it, and do protection & banishing. Focussing on Satanic powers and the Daemons' sigils and abilities strengthens those attributes in you (I think you can pick and choose which you prefer, as well), and that also brings them to you, as well.

An important point might be for you to not force yourself to ignore it; just be calm and re-focus your attention on something else when you realise you are feeding it. I say "might be for you" because I don't know if that is a problem for you or not; we're all individuals, which brings me onto another point - we all move at or own speed, and Satan and the Daemons know that. If you are, however, taking advantage, that you can do what you want against Satan's Kingdom and just be forgiven regardless, just so you Can be careless and selfish negatively, and damage things again, you might want to remember,
"...but he that opposes me will regret it sorely"
- Satan, Al Jilwah, the Black Book of Satan
http://www.angelfire.com/empire/serpent ... ilwah.html

The Daemons are Just and Proud, and rightly so.

There might also be some latent insecurity/low self-esteem problems deep down that you might still need to get rid of regarding failing all the time (again, I am just throwing out ideas because I don't know you).

If you are able to yet, why not create your own thoughtform/s which benefit you? If you can and do, then don't forget to programme it/them to obey YOU ONLY and also to feed off positive energy, e.g. from the Sun or from Runes you empower it/them with.

It might be prudent to use a lot of different methods including those I suggested already, and also other methods you prefer. You might also buy and wear around your neck some Hematite used with THURISAZ -
"Hematite used with this rune can shield against electro-magnetic energies and is therefore helpful in deflecting curses.
...
White Magick: Rune of healing..."

or Black Tourmaline used with ALGIZ -
"This rune is used for protection. It is also used in consecration and the banishing of negative energies. It is excellent for the operator to wear when performing dangerous rituals as it protects against negative energies. Black tourmaline is the stone used with this rune."
http://www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Odin.html

For example, use it while doing the RtRS. You might wear it after, as well.

 

[[email protected]]

Please give a broad scope of the story at least. You can just change the names and not give locations anyway.

 

[centurion_666881]

OP is shooting his/herself in the foot. My theory is OP is finding it difficult to fully grasp dedication to Satanism while having a "normal" life to care for as well... There is nothing wrong with having a mate. We are not Buddhist monks or Christians! I know that in the years of advancement and spiritual warfare to come I will be living a life with hobbies, goals, and definitely with a sexual/ romantic partner! The Gods want us to live happy and successful lives... You should seriously consider that falling in "love" with someone who race mixes, does not meditate, and does not care about how the entire human race is being tortured by the jews IS a bad idea. HOWEVER there is nothing wrong with having sex. While you are freaking out there are plenty of Satanists who follow a routine and keep up with their warfare and are able to have a mate. You should consider reading more of www.joyofsatan.org ... Read sermons and other entries that pertain to maintaining your life in an enemy occupied planet...

 

[kieithnightmare0]

Thank you for that. Yeah if I'm sounding like a dumbass I need to be called out. This issue did start with major insecurities. Many of which I've had since childhood. I just didn't know how bad they really were till it was too late. Also I would NEVER want to do anything against Satan and the Gods on purpose! That's why I freaked out so much. These insecurities are still being worked on. So I'll take extra steps to protect myself.

 

[kieithnightmare0]

Oh no no it's nothing like that! Hasn't anything to do with race mixing or jews or finding a balance between Satanism and relationships. But I did hyper-focus on relationships for a while and that caused a lot of problems. And I pushed the person I wanted to be with away with terrible behaviors that stemmed from insecurities and ruined everything.
Brushing up on articles on the JoS is never a bad idea though. Thank you!

 

[David Bo]

I will give a little bit of advice.  I do not know your story... but...

If you are sincere in your story, maybe the gods were doing you a favor by testing you... leaving you alone to be in your own space... so you could learn to fend for yourself a little bit.  In Satanism one of the key things in learning to find inner strength in the face of adversity.  The Strength to move on and do what you will do despite rejection or any opinion that does not empower you.  Look at this as a form of Blessing as a "The Silence before The Storm." 
Do not go looking for others to give you another chance, but rather by giving yourself another chance by carving out your own path.  If another chance is given, it is because you did the right Prepatory work to allow it to manifest in your life.  This is an act of Black Magick... we all do use our gifts of Black Magick to create circumstances which allow us "another chance... another opportunity."
Certain demons will also give lessons like this as they are known to act as guides on the Dark Path to be initiators.  Good luck and do the Work in silence without regards for others voice.  Listen to your own voice and do what you need to do.

On Saturday, September 2, 2017 1:21 PM, "pinkteabunny@... [JoyofSatan666]" <[email protected] wrote:


  I know it's Mercury retrograde so I hope people see this! As many of you may know, I've been in the groups and old forum for a while. I've been a Satanist for 5+ years and I feel I should give people (especially new people) sojme serious advice. I ask that the clergy also hear me out if they have the time to (I know they're super busy, so it's ok) I just ask that everything be read before I'm judged. I put everything in paragraphs for easy reading.

THE WARNING: I don't want anyone else making this mistake!
When I first came to Satanism, I never wanted money or fame or any of that superficial crap. And I still DONT. I slowly but surely made progress over the years. Slow progress, but progress. I even got an astrology reading from HP nodded cobra some time ago,and was happy to know how much potential I had. Nothing could stop me from advancing. Nothing.

But although I have made many mistakes on my path. None have ever been this severe. I want to let people know, Satan and the Gods ARE forgiving and understanding, but they can only give one so many chances if one keeps messing them up as severely as I have this year.

Now, I am NOT leaving Satan or the Gods!!!! However, I feel like Ive been denied another chance when I feel like I actually have enough wisdom from past failures, and I'm super ready and willing to change.

(if you all want to know and if it's ok for me to release that info) i don't want any private messages with anyone for safety reasons, unless it's the clergy (unlikely though I think)

This year I let a basic human need (relationships love...etc) get in my way and it severely clouded my judgement and made me act in ways I never knew I could act. And for anyone who is wondering, I am 100% sure this is NOT an enemy attack, has nothing to do with Jews or anything. And I am NOT a victim here!! How do I know? Because when talking with them(the Gods), they gave off Satanic energy, showed me Satan's sigil a few times..etc so I KNOW it's not an enemy.

I want to first say, that Satan and the Gods have been the most kind and generous beings ever to me. But I let my petty emotional needs get in they way of seeing the truth. I should of listened to them and took their advice regardless of how I felt. At the time. And not doing that has brought me where I am today. But every time I fell, learned just a little bit more of what my previous mistake was. And I HAVE made improvements since the beginning of the year, but not enough.

This is the terrifying consequence of being a fucking idiot. I DONT WANT TO BE A FALLEN COMRADE. I ENJOY doing the RtRs and not to brag, but on average I would do 12-16 rituals daily which includes vibrating the 72 ritual a total of 18-21 times (72 this one time) daily, sometimes twice daily. So I want to clarify I absolutelyI HATE the enemy. (Obviously lol)

But now it's come to the point where even if I want to advance myself, improve myself it's too late. And I know "it's never too late to improve yourself" and I stand by that still. But I know on my own I won't get very far without Satanic help, not to mention all the enemy attacks. Nothing I can do can make up for what I've done. I've asked and the answer is always "that's not enough" and "I'm sorry" and I know the Gods act justly. So I know I have seriously pissed them off, even though i want to change everything.

I feel Satan and the Gods have left me and now I don't know what to do. They have given me SO MANY DARN CHANCES to fix my shit. Probably more that I deserved... and I failed at every one of them. But with every failure I HAVE learned an inch of information of what went wrong. And now that I'm ready and I feel like I'm wiser now, an I AM taking the necessary steps to improve, I'm being told it's "too late" and that they don't care. And that future workings that I have planned to fix these problems won't work.

This is only fair I guess... as much as I hate to admit it. I'm not innocent here. But my will to improve myself, and keep going and never stop trying are sincere. I can't let myself let go of that no matter what.

Now I'm not going to stop meditating or doing RtRs.... even if I don't have protection or guidance. And I don't know that will happen to me. If I give up, that will show that I'm weak. I don't want to be a goy!!!!!!. If I keep going..I fear I'll get attacked by the enemy and I won't be able to handle it without Satanic protection.

This should be common sense, but it's not to some yet, (obviously) if the Gods give you advice TAKE IT NO MATTER HOW YOU FEEL AT THAT MONMENT!!! You do NOT know everything. They know what they are doing, you don't. Do not be so self centered either.

THE SUGGESTION:
I couldn't find any sermon that talk about this specifically. What do people like me do? I'm still trying to advance myself. But I feel (I could be wrong here!!!) like they may not want me to. I don't want to be left to be torn to bits by the enemy... and I know the enemy tries to keep Gentiles away from Satan. But this is different. And it's scary. Would it be ok if the clergy could write a sermon on this? They could use me as an example if they'd like and I would be more that happy to provide more details on this situation so they could get the full picture. (Obviously they don't have to if they don't want to. I'm not gonna contact anyone directly out of respect.)

THE HELP:
I feel like I can legitimately improve myself given another chance (that doesn't seem very likely right now though) and I WANT to keep meditating and fighting. But I feel like I'm not wanted in Satanism anymore because of what I did this year. And as much as I would like to make up for it... it seems the only way they're telling me I can is to leave and "deal with it" but I just.... can't bring myself to accept that.

Now when I visualize father Satan's sigil, I feel his energy leaving instead of being there (hope that makes sense) even saying "HAIL SATAN!" Internally I don't feel his energy like I used to anymore. I just.. can't CANT and won't leave Satan, nor can I ever go back to the enemy programs. I know too much. I'm better than that. I don't want to be asleep again. In this life time or any other (IF I'm still allowed to reincarnate and see the Satanic truth again)

My whole point is, now that I ready and wiser and more willing than ever to fix my behavior and deprogram myself from everything... it's "too late". I've acted so crazy and horrible, and now that I WANT TO AND IM SINCERE (always have been) AND WILLING to change my ways it's just too late, according to the powers of hell. I just don't want the answer to be "give up".

I want to believe that there is still a chance for me. That if I improve, persevere, and keep meditating I'll show Satan that I can change and that my soul is not worthless. But right now.. things seem grim and I don't know what will happen to me.

The though of never getting to see the Satanic truth is a scary thought. Don't let that become your reality. Make the right choices.

Thank you to those who have read all this. It really means the world to me right now.

HAIL SATAN... because I can't bring myself to not say it.

 

[[email protected]]

Either move on or go explain yourself to the person.

Despairing won't do you any good. Nor will replaying the scene for years in your head. Trust me on that one.