my sexual orientation

[golkr2]

Hello! I would like to ask a very personal question. I can't determine my orientation. For a long time, I often watched pornography, of a completely different kind. Now I feel confused, I don't understand how I feel. Could pornography have corrupted my mind that much? I'm a teenager. I'm a guy, I don't look feminine, I play sports. By the way, as soon as I stop watching pornography, after a while, it seems to me, my consciousness returns to normal and I am sure that I am straight. Please, just give me some advice on how to fully understand myself.

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

Now I feel confused, I don't understand how I feel. Could pornography have corrupted my mind that much?

Pornography DOES these things: it confuses you. At your age it was the same with me, I was extremely confused by the thing and by what it appeared to me; that is, all kinds of things within the reach of a click and the manager of the porn site expects you to experience your sexuality in those ways, but there are really so many in a confusing way and you will not be the one to spontaneously choose one of these, simply an algorithm within the reach of a click.

My best advice is this: you are understanding yourself more in this period, this is the teenager section, so if you write here you are in the phase in which you want to understand yourself better. And it is a good thing, necessary and will be crucially useful for you to grow (this will be the beginning of becoming the best version of yourself when you grow up, it is not unrelated).

Precisely for this reason, experience sexuality as it comes naturally to you, try to understand what you want, in reality, in your deepest desires, etc. Not what the algorithm proposes to you in a totally perverse and unrealistic way: sexuality is a healthy thing. Don't let a porn site ruin it.

 

[Epiphany]

Hello! I would like to ask a very personal question. I can't determine my orientation. For a long time, I often watched pornography, of a completely different kind. Now I feel confused, I don't understand how I feel. Could pornography have corrupted my mind that much? I'm a teenager. I'm a guy, I don't look feminine, I play sports. By the way, as soon as I stop watching pornography, after a while, it seems to me, my consciousness returns to normal and I am sure that I am straight. Please, just give me some advice on how to fully understand myself.

Porn can warp your mind and make you aroused by things that you ordinarily wouldn't, even things that are unnatural. It's very unhealthy.

If you don't imagine yourself in romance with men in daily life then you're most likely not gay. On the other hand, it could be that you have androphile inclinations buried somewhere within and porn brings this out.

You have to get to know yourself outside the context of porn to understand if this is really the case.

You don't have to be a sissy to be gay, alot of the gays are macho men. Try to free yourself from porn.

 

[Epiphany]

If you're young, it's extremely important to stay away from porn, because your mind is still developing.

 

[luis]

Hello! I would like to ask a very personal question. I can't determine my orientation. For a long time, I often watched pornography, of a completely different kind. Now I feel confused, I don't understand how I feel. Could pornography have corrupted my mind that much? I'm a teenager. I'm a guy, I don't look feminine, I play sports. By the way, as soon as I stop watching pornography, after a while, it seems to me, my consciousness returns to normal and I am sure that I am straight. Please, just give me some advice on how to fully understand myself.

Whatever sexual orientiation you are it's fine. It seems you are scared to be something else than straight. Spiritual Satanism wants everyone to be free to be themselves, even because the Kundalini requires you to be free from any sexual problems to raise. You are young, you'll figure it out with time. Just be open minded. Porn in general is not good whatever you are straight or not. Try your best to stay away from it.

 

[golkr2]

Pornography DOES these things: it confuses you. At your age it was the same with me, I was extremely confused by the thing and by what it appeared to me; that is, all kinds of things within the reach of a click and the manager of the porn site expects you to experience your sexuality in those ways, but there are really so many in a confusing way and you will not be the one to spontaneously choose one of these, simply an algorithm within the reach of a click.

My best advice is this: you are understanding yourself more in this period, this is the teenager section, so if you write here you are in the phase in which you want to understand yourself better. And it is a good thing, necessary and will be crucially useful for you to grow (this will be the beginning of becoming the best version of yourself when you grow up, it is not unrelated).

Precisely for this reason, experience sexuality as it comes naturally to you, try to understand what you want, in reality, in your deepest desires, etc. Not what the algorithm proposes to you in a totally perverse and unrealistic way: sexuality is a healthy thing. Don't let a porn site ruin it.

Hello, thank you! To be honest, no one imagined myself in a romantic relationship with a man. It scares me that pornography has really made my mind more depraved. I do not know how to deal with this and fully realize myself.

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

I do not know how to deal with this and fully realize myself.

Once you stop using pornography, you will not only detox from it, but also detox from its effects. It is like a horror movie that traumatizes you. If you watch a horror movie every night, you will be traumatized every night, but if you stop watching this genre, you will even forget the plots of what you watched.

Just focus on feeling yourself. Don't think about "what did I actually feel watching that video?", try to feel yourself, what you really feel. It's really normal that it's difficult for you now, because it's the period you're coming into contact with. Once the period is over, you might have a much clearer vision and you'll definitely be more sexually mature.

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

can you tell me about meditations?

Sorry, I didn't read your entire reply, but scrolling through the topic I noticed the word "meditation" in this reply of yours. It's very important, read here:

https://templeofzeus.org/NEWPEOPLE.html

Use also this link:

https://templeofzeus.org/Basic_Meditation_Program.html

 

[luis]

Once you stop using pornography, you will not only detox from it, but also detox from its effects. It is like a horror movie that traumatizes you. If you watch a horror movie every night, you will be traumatized every night, but if you stop watching this genre, you will even forget the plots of what you watched.

Just focus on feeling yourself. Don't think about "what did I actually feel watching that video?", try to feel yourself, what you really feel. It's really normal that it's difficult for you now, because it's the period you're coming into contact with. Once the period is over, you might have a much clearer vision and you'll definitely be more sexually mature.

Hello, thank you! To be honest, no one imagined myself in a romantic relationship with a man. It scares me that pornography has really made my mind more depraved. I do not know how to deal with this and fully realize myself.

While pornography is not healthy. Let's not discard the idea of the guy being attracted to man. Like I said the Kundalini needs you to be free from any sexual problems. If op is bisexual then it's what it is. If I watch porn and I get aroused by a men then I should start to ask myself why it happens.

Op said that he plays sports and is not feminine which shows a distorted way of sexuality. Being gay or bisexual does not mean you need to be feminine or to not like sports. It just means you are attracted to the same sex.

I don't know what kind of porn you are watching but If you get aroused by male genitalia or by men in general than there is a good chance you could be bisexual and there is nothing wrong with it.

You can't do a spell to change it. You can only do spell to free yourself from any sexual confusion/problems. They will help you see the truth whatever that is.

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

Let's not discard the idea of the guy being attracted to man

Totally agree with you, Brother! Even though this concept was missing from my reply because it didn't focus on his orientation, I TOTALLY agree with this beautiful addition of yours, thank you for making it! Yes, it is really appropriate for you to understand what you like @golkr2 It's part of this process of knowing yourself!

 

[golkr2]

Totally agree with you, Brother! Even though this concept was missing from my reply because it didn't focus on his orientation, I TOTALLY agree with this beautiful addition of yours, thank you for making it! Yes, it is really appropriate for you to understand what you like @golkr2 It's part of this process of knowing yourself!

To be honest, it's hard for me to figure out what I really like. I don't even know how to figure out what turns me on. For example, do I need to view naked photos of both girls and boys on the internet? I don't know. When I masturbate, let's just say, well, I don't even know, most of the time I can't imagine anything.Why do I have doubts? I don't understand feelings of love or sympathy. Well, let's say I liked one girl, I often imagined her in my fantasies, but suddenly I didn't like her? Lol, I don't understand how to define my feelings. I understand nothing. There have also been moments in my life that contradicted my naturalness, but I've been thinking for a very long time about what could have caused it, perhaps childhood trauma, perhaps a complex, perhaps I just masturbate and watch pornography too often, so my desires can change dramatically. I will notice that I am not attracted to women's breasts, I do not know, but I can imagine having sex with a woman. And it excites me, I love it when a woman touches me. Oh, the gods! I'm really confused. I do not know how to sort myself out.I have been living without a father since I was seven years old, perhaps this also affects the ambivalence of my thoughts. Perhaps it affected my lack of self-confidence. (I DON'T DREAM of kissing a guy, I don't dream of having sex with a guy, I'm not turned on by having sex with a guy), but at the same time, I like a cool body, let's just say. And I do not know how to check what exactly excites me. Anyway, I don't have any friends. No girls, no guys, although I'm sociable) But I don't have any friends at all, because someone is interested in racing, football, and I'm interested in spiritual things, someone is playing minecraft, and I'm sitting and falling into a trance. Yes, I'm different from other teenagers, so I don't have any friends in real life. However, I talk to everyone at school, but I never meet anyone, let's say, outside of school. By the way, I don't think that orientation from birth is nonsense. I can cite many stories that prove this. Orientation can also change, especially during adolescence. And I want to know exactly which one I have. And also to get rid of complexes somehow. Thank you for helping me! Sorry about the essay.

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

Wonderful reply.

I really hope so. This feedback is really important to me. It took me almost an hour to write that reply... ...I'm not afraid of "wasted time", but I would like to know if I was able to help sometimes. Thank you!!!

 

[Symmachos-ZEUS/SHAITAN]

You are a great person who helps others!

You are so kind! It is beautiful what you wrote to me!

Don't worry, you are among Satanists. It is NORMAL that on these things there is cooperation and a desire to help you. We are not a Christian sect; we will not persecute you at your first problem.

Yes, I'm too lazy to meditate, and I'm still not 100% sure about Satanism, I'm just looking for answers

Don't worry, thank you for telling about this obstacle of yours. It is off-topic for sure, but know that laziness is not the enemy of meditation. There are really so many occasions when I want to be lazy during the day, and to escape from some "duty" that will get me nowhere (for example, a friend of mine who asks me to turn on the PC to spend hours watching him waste time on bad video games) I use the "I can't, I want to stay in bed for a while longer to meditate" as an excuse.

Regarding the fact that you are not sure about Satanism, UNDERSTAND, if you were in ancient Greece or ancient Egypt right now, you would have no problem "being sure about Satanism" (Satanism is exactly what was practiced there, of course what was practiced there was not called "Satanism" for a purely expressive and linguistic matter, but there were not the differences that people make up).

But now you are not in the Kingdom of Ramses II, you are in a country where in all likelihood, the most well-known and popular form of spirituality is "Christ said repent, repent, being sad will do your soul good." Don't worry, as long as you have had the courage to think for yourself and be yourself by not giving a damn that "Jesus saw that you opened the JoS forum! He is crying a lot and wants you to close it, 100 frustrations," but WANTING YOUR GOOD, the real one... in my opinion that alone does you MUCH more honor than you think!

I wouldn't be doing meditation or other spiritual things right

Correct. JoS says in several articles that knowing oneself is essential in any spiritual path. In the beginning it's not strictly essential in my experience, but if you want to really advance and understand what your soul is going through, how to better work on it, what you're prone to and what you're not, etc. ...after a while it becomes very good to begin to know yourself. Maybe opening the third eye does not require much knowledge about you, but try to think for example about when you have to rid your soul of negative Karma. It is a trivial example, but it gives the idea.

This is my knowledge, I can't live in ignorance

Satanism is here so that you do not remain in any kind of ignorance (and also so that you live as well and as long as possible, is literally the ultimate goal of Satanism). Take your time to experiment with your tendencies if you like. Find out a little bit about what you like if one night you think you actually want to try something new. There's no problem with wanting to try things out (if that's what we want, not if we have to force ourselves: it's not right to force ourselves into sex as much as it's not right to repress ourselves). The only thing I ask for your sake is this: keep yourself protected (condoms and any other precautions from side effects), it's VERY important, but beyond that experiment and live as you feel like.

What if I'm gay after all?

Whether you are straight, gay or bisexual is not a problem of any kind; in fact, falling into one of these three is absolutely a blessing that will allow you to feel good about yourself, and you will only gain from it. So be happy.