Nicholas,Its not just the job, its stopping and starting meditations. This is a common thing I am hearing from other Zevism. A common difficulty. When you are starting and stopping, it is raising and lowering your energies, like revving a car engine. Wears you out. It's exhausting. The trick is to find something simple that you CAN do, even on your worst day. Start there, and work to develop consistency with it. It's better to do one thing consistently than to do nothing at all. What I've been learning is that when one does a ton of meditations one day and nothing the next, and a little something the next (as time allows), what this actually is doing is tearing holes in the aura and opening oneself for unwanted energies to come in, and misfortune. It also leaves one feeling exhausted.
One of the basics that must be done daily is an AOP. Baby steps. So for example, AOP, 5 rounds of Sun/Moon breathing, cleaning the soul and a Ritual. This doesn't take long. Do it first thing in the morning as it aligns your energies for the day. And then also, you are done; its out of your hair and you have the whole rest of the day to work and do other things without feeling guilty: Ooooh, I didn't do my meditations! Because the last thing you want to be doing is to have to squeeze them in at the end of a busy day. You won't want to do it, will be too tired and say: figure of the past, I'll do it tomorrow! So back to the drawing board and working on consistency. Sounds simple but it's not; its hard!
If you can't, try breaking it up: AOP first thing, at lunch break take five minutes and do the Sun/Moon breathing. End of the day do a Ritual and clean your soul. As this becomes habit it will become easier. Then eventually you will be able to build on it and add other meditations. Another thing is to time them so that you can schedule them in. Then at the same times daily, do them. This is very powerful.
So for example, doing all this at the start of ones day:
AOP: suryae (full rosary). I concentrate on the breath and breathing in sun energy while doing this: 15 minutes.
http://www.angelfire.com/empire/serpent ... ation.htmlSun/Moon: 4 minutes.
http://www.angelfire.com/empire/serpent ... stril.htmlSpiritual Cleansing Ritual #1 to prevent another major war: 4 minutes.
http://dawn666blacksun.angelfire.com/Re ... dus153.htmReturning Curses (cleaning soul) 4 minutes.
http://dawn666blacksun.angelfire.com/1-2-17.htm
Total: 27 minutes. Round that up to a half hour. Set the alarm thirty minutes earlier and then before you get out of bed just do them. You will feel energized for the day.
Some people have more time than others. Satan isn't going to leave you because you aren't perfect right away. If you were, you'd be a God. Just do the best you can.
Hail Satan!In Glory and Power Exalted!