How do I accept myself? What is the point of being here?

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

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Calm down, take a deep breath and remember who you are. Remember what you are and what we live for.
you're a Zevist and you're strong. You helped me when I was at my worst. You cannot be a bad person.

Cleanse your house with satanic blue fires. And you do Returning Curses Part 1 and Part 2.

If you think there's an entity in your home that's bothering you, do a banishment ritual.

Prayer of protection can come in handy.

You can do void meditation to quiet the thoughts.

I wish you well ^^

Have a nice day.

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

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I'm sorry to hear that you feel that way. You seem like such a kind and caring, deeply introspective person, based on your posts.

I've also struggled heavily with self-acceptance in the past. Although it was my husband's words that acted as a catalyst to shatter and put an end to that, what set the groundwork for me to let go of those negative feelings was my realisation that the reason I believed myself to be wrong, was that I believed the world to be wrong; unfairly so.

Since I was a child, whenever I saw anything or anyone, I immediately thought of every way that people might criticise it, but never mentioned any of it. Flaws were something I assessed subconsciously so that I could analyse ahead of time how to improve my surroundings and solve problems that might occur. However, I didn't judge anyone for it.

When it came to myself, I similarly thought of every way in which others might criticise me; but instead of doing it without judgement, I became terrified of anyone else seeing those imagined "flaws". I was so scared of being hated for all the things I made up in my mind, regardless of whether it was even an issue or whether or not I could help it, that I began to hate myself in others' stead pre-emptively.

One day, while meditating, I had a revelation: isn't it incredibly arrogant for me to assume things to be wrong, just because they could be more suited to humans if they were different? For example, yes, the Sun may burn out someday, but how exactly is that wrong?
In fact, isn't it incredibly entitled for me to expect it to keep going forever, even after how much it has already given us?

So I decided to start from the premise that things are the way they're supposed to be. I then understood that the "flaws" I saw, were simply things that could be improved on for the sake of other people, and have nothing to do with "right" or "wrong".

With that in mind, I'd like you to consider a possibility: perhaps you are the way you're supposed to be. Every part of you, your body, your mind, and your feelings, none of it is wrong, because that's just how you are, and that's okay. If you want to improve on certain things, that's fine, of course. But don't change because you hate yourself. Change because you want to!

Something else I realised is that when it comes to truly doing the right (positive) thing, one can't afford to let oneself be deceived or distracted by negativity from others. Because I'm sure that if you just listen to yourself deep down and don't worry about what others might think, you know what is really right for yourself better than anyone else.

As a logical-minded person, I struggled to come to terms with the fact that not everything has to make sense. Sometimes, things just are the way they are, no matter how I complain. So don't be so hard on yourself. I've always appreciated your presence here.

So, please treat yourself well, and with the kindness you show to others. You deserve it. Wouldn't your Guardian tell you the same?

What is it that you do not like about yourself? Are you willing to share because if not, everyone who answers is going to give you a blanket "fix-all" that really won't do anything other than encourage you to "keep fighting the good fight".

Maybe you are unhealthy, do you have any chronic illness you can't shake? If the body is not okay then the mind is not okay and thus your image of yourself is not "okay".

What about the people around you? Are there narcissists infecting your space, making you feel put down or burdened by their presence?

HAVE YOU BEEN EATING CORRECTLY? (aka good fatty foods with lots of protein and carbs) You have given us a very scant view of a "problem" only you are able to see. Please give us more details if you want real help. If you don't want to and just want words of encouragement, that's fine too.

From what I could gather from reading your stuff, you just seem "stuck" with "fright". Scared of acceptance of your personhood because (for reasons you have not given us) you are a "bad person". What are you seeing in yourself that is not obvious to the rest of us? Please share your reality so we may either confirm or disprove your perceived view of yourself incase you are suffering from delusion/shen energy disturbance.

Sometimes, all one needs is a mirror image reflected back to know the realities of themselves.

I don’t understand you. What part of yourself can you not accept? There is nothing inherently „good“ or „bad“, this is relative.

Why would you be a bad person? If you yourself think that you are a bad person, just change from now on, and keep satanic ethics in mind while you stroll aroubd life.

Also, you need to accept yourself for advancement, and as you advance you will understand and accept yourself more and more.

Accept yourself, with all your desires, but keep ethics in mind.

Are you open to specify more about your issue?

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

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If the things which dont like about yourself are negatives then start a working. You can free yourself using uruz,ansuz and munka from any negative obstacle.

Further you can use Isa to stop the negative thoughts, completely halting the negative thoughts about yourself.

Tackle the problem from different angles.

You can simply raise energies and affirm something like "in positive ways for me i now always have positive thoughts about myself at all times in every way permanently"

Deep cleaning will greatly help you with this as well, it makes you much more "stable" in your mind.

There are many options to go with.

Workings and applying energies are much better than defeating something negative with raw will power.

As ninrick said if you feel comfortable sharing more then you should,so we cam understand better and tackling the problem will be more direct.

You'll find some good answers from our great HP Zevios Metathronos here: https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?t=75134

You have only a mental image of yourself, therefore the mind is prone to influence and limitation, and then you identify and confuse yourself with falsities.

Having even the thought of "I have to accept myself", anything of this kind is from a source of confusion. You are accepted by yourself by default, you only have to look on what is to be improved or understood.

But this isn't a question of accepting anything, but of managing your inner resources and putting them on the right paths of action.

HP HC has answered your posts on which you use " philosophy " as a means of deciding and gaining wisdom. This was told it is just a mental gymnastics so far, and as you can see leads you to nihilistic values since the mental is limited and not to be identified with.

You are not your mental, it is an instrument. These thoughts of "I am a bad person" are to be entertained by a laugh as it truly gives no value neither a description of reality, but it is only a victimization of emotions.

Feelings are irrelevant where purpose is lacking. So the right question might be, why do I care about "acceptance", why I make it seem I am against myself? What is with this whole spiral?

Maybe I need to push in other directions and don't attribute meaning to low level chatter of the mind.

Maybe I am not to care about menial generic patterns of the mind, take control and shape as I see fit.

Focus on practical things, practical spiritual actions. With detachment and good sense of analysis in time, improving and having no pressure to be something, but just being without any filter of the mind.

You already are, and you become. You already accepted, nothing to be easily disseminated here.

You have business here, primary yourself being the subject of help. Have you read all of HPZM sermons? Read them many times, you'll find help progressively in the same words as years pass.

As Nakedpluto said to read HP Hoddedcobra's sermons, read also high priestess Pythia's sermons on

You have only a mental image of yourself, therefore the mind is prone to influence and limitation, and then you identify and confuse yourself with falsities.

Having even the thought of "I have to accept myself", anything of this kind is from a source of confusion. You are accepted by yourself by default, you only have to look on what is to be improved or understood.

But this isn't a question of accepting anything, but of managing your inner resources and putting them on the right paths of action.

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Oh Brother, thank you for this, this is pure Gold. I will take my time to read it a few times and meditate on it. Cheers!

I'm being completely honest because I've really got to the point now where it's become very hectic for me. The thing is, I can be selfish. For example, I have posts that I've written (even if I've written them purely for help and guidance) to get some level of praise for them. That's very bad to admit, but I can't take it anymore. It didn't used to be like this, I'm not even sure it's really the case, but it's come up a lot lately and it bothers me.

I am typically the kind of person who can feel sorry for a butterfly and wants to help it. I look at a person's face and I know what they are feeling and I start to feel it too. I can really feel sorry for people and I often think I'm weak for doing that.

Perhaps the praise goes back to the fact that I have perhaps received very little praise from others in my life because everything was "expected" of me. What I was proud of, others thought I should have done better. This "selfishness" really bothers me. I stand up for ToZ and my Companions because since I have been here, I have felt an extremely close emotional connection with them, as they are family. Thoughts that bother me like this put me in what can't be called situations where I think I don't want to further destroy this community or I don't deserve the Knowledge and the like.

I have a rare attraction to harmful passions, and it's not good, maybe it's Neptune, and I love that planet.

So if you say I'm a destructive personality, I understand. I've tried to change, but I've agonized in my soul on a level that's hard to describe. I'm still not at my peak, but I can't take it anymore. If you hate me, I totally understand, I don't look at myself any differently.

... If you hate me, I totally understand, I don't look at myself any differently.

Would seeking praise make you a bad person?
Rather use your thirst for praise as motivation to advance further and further.

The important thing is that in the material you write there are no harmful things, but there are useful things and otherwise there should be no problems.

Problems must be taken by the neck and eliminated, otherwise you will suffer under them forever.
Problems are not part of who you are and are only transient, but if you don't fight them then they will be eternal.

Also, don't hate yourself, you have no reason to.

So if you say I'm a destructive personality, I understand. I've tried to change, but I've agonized in my soul on a level that's hard to describe. I'm still not at my peak, but I can't take it anymore. If you hate me, I totally understand, I don't look at myself any differently.

Hate you? Get some grounding. You are not seeing things straight.

....

Okay, I understand the case. It seems like stems from Neptune. This planet, as far as I observed, %90 of the time does not work for the good of the individual.

You will be able to do Sun Square in this month. Actually, I can sympathize with you. I hated myself, as well. Not because of I think I do some sort of harmful actions or being bad person etc.

I can not speak generally, but in my case, hating myself has resulted in advancement. I hated the weakness in myself. But since this Neptune planet is predominant in your soul, what I say will not reach to you as a call to standing up, probably.

Please, if you are able, spam Sun Squares. I dislike megalomaniacs and self-hating losers, but as far as I see, you are prone to be balanced, since you have both self-caring and also care for others, just like me. Do it for yourself, advance and help more people as much as you can.

If you are weak, then the help comes from you will be weaker. If you are strong and powerful, and of course helpful, then the people's praises to you or whatsoever is not a bad thing.

Actually, we need to be balanced. As I explained, doing something for yourself or doing something for someone else, both are not bad. A balanced person takes action out of both of them.

Hello!!!
Why should you even accept yourself, I approve the fact that we should be aware of our downs, but i do not agree with accepting them, neither being in denial while the reality is different. You should see yourself from the "3rd person" when it comes to this, every day that you fight your "inner self" is a victory for you, you are doing great and you should strive for even better, but not while hating yourself, you can hate your weakness maybe, but use that as fuel for your motivation.
There's nothing wrong with hating and accepting does not apply everywhere.
There's nothing that cannot be solved with action.
It is you who decides your path and the "higher" being that you'll become in the future.

I'm being completely honest because I've really got to the point now where it's become very hectic for me. The thing is, I can be selfish. For example, I have posts that I've written (even if I've written them purely for help and guidance) to get some level of praise for them. That's very bad to admit, but I can't take it anymore. It didn't used to be like this, I'm not even sure it's really the case, but it's come up a lot lately and it bothers me.

I am typically the kind of person who can feel sorry for a butterfly and wants to help it. I look at a person's face and I know what they are feeling and I start to feel it too. I can really feel sorry for people and I often think I'm weak for doing that.

Perhaps the praise goes back to the fact that I have perhaps received very little praise from others in my life because everything was "expected" of me. What I was proud of, others thought I should have done better. This "selfishness" really bothers me. I stand up for ToZ and my Companions because since I have been here, I have felt an extremely close emotional connection with them, as they are family. Thoughts that bother me like this put me in what can't be called situations where I think I don't want to further destroy this community or I don't deserve the Knowledge and the like.

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I,appreciate your work,you re the first person i ve interact on this forum,and only person on my list of friends :D

Personally i have no expectations and no need to be approve of anyone,and this gives me great mental comfort :mrgreen:

Try to make peace with who you are and where you are right now in life, and find pride and happiness in that. Then improve towards the vision in your mind of who you want to be.

You are the 1% of people in this world who have awakened spiritually and found Satan. You are part of the ToZ. That alone is cause for an abundance of self worth and pride.

Your future is with the Gods. There is no way you could be a "bad" person, even objectively. It only matters anyway how you feel about yourself.

If you can fall asleep comfortably at night then you're a good person. That's how I measure it. You haven't done the sorts of things that keep a person awake at night.

If you can't find it within you to like yourself as you are right now then I suggest some workings. There really is no reason to dislike yourself.

Give yourself a hug because you deserve it. Self nurture.

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

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There is no shame in being able to guide others, in the sense of transferring knowledge, even if it is hard for you to personally accept. In this case, it means you have a constructive mind, but maybe your emotions are lacking. This does not mean the entirety of your personality is flawed.

As others have said, we are all working within imperfect souls. Some of us have different strengths and weaknesses than others, but nobody is perfect. In reality, it is good that you are self-aware of your flaws, as many can be blind to them, but you are also feeling these flaws too deeply.

The most important thing you can do is trust in the Gods and trust in yourself to keep calm until a permanent solution is implemented. Do not expect perfection with anything. In this case, you do not have to immediately learn to accept yourself, but you at least have to allow yourself to accept that you can fix yourself. In other words, don't expect any pain to be gone right now, just know that it is not permanent.

Dealing with self-doubts or other negative self-perception is a big deal for Zevists who need to have control of their minds. You are not alone, as I would expect everyone to have to confront these feelings within themselves, for the sake of their advancement.

There can be many different astrological combinations that can result in these sorts of feelings. For that reason, I would recommend not focusing on certain planets, but instead focusing on the concept itself when you do a working to resolve this.

--------------------

I am actually doing a working for this now, which has already had strong effects, with plenty of tears involved. In a way, this thread is giving me some solace about my own problems. See below:

Munka x90
“This energy of Munka has permanently removed any unhealthy self-doubts, negative self-perceptions, or any other negative thought patterns, in the best way for me.” x9

Start: 6/20/2022 (waning Pisces)

Alternatively, you can change it to something like:
"This energy of Munka has permanently removed any obstacles to my self-acceptance and confidence, in the best way for me." x9

As always, start on a waning Pisces, Scorpio, Aquarius, or Capricorn moon for this. 9 relates to endings and should be used. Ansuz can be substituted in place of Munka if necessary. Sowilo can also be used, given its ability to burn dross/transform, as well as instill confidence.

Beyond this, it is also important to do other supporting workings. In regards to the sense of self, I would highly advise doing a Sun Square when it soon enters Leo. If you do not feel comfortable with this, then change it to a 40 day working, but use the planetary mantra.

You can also use fire energy, Sowilo, Raidho, or Surya on a short-term basis to restore confidence in yourself. Chant or inhale the energy, then affirm: "This energy has now restored my confidence in myself, in a fully positive manner for me." x3

I hope this helps. Remember, everyone who has responded here is doing so because they wish to help. In this way, they look beyond your flaws to help you grow. Even if you have a hard time doing that for yourself, know that others are there to provide this same love and support.

Good luck.

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

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Calm down, take a deep breath and remember who you are. Remember what you are and what we live for.
you're an Zevism and you're strong. You helped me when I was at my worst. You cannot be a bad person.

Cleanse your house with satanic blue fires. And you do Returning Curses Part 1 and Part 2.

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Thank you very much.

The moment has come when I don't know what to do. Things like self-acceptance and self-awareness, which I have recommended to my Mates in my posts, are about accepting ourselves as we are. But I can't do that for myself......

I have been working hard every day for the past few days to accept and recognize myself. Well, the self-awareness is pretty much complete, but that's not my problem, my problem is that I can't accept myself as I am. The Gods try to help and guide me and when I get the answers then all is well and things constructively change their meaning, but after a while thoughts like "I'm a bad person" and so on keep coming.

I get fed up with that. I don't really want to accept myself because what I am is not what I don't like. I feel like I don't want to do anything and thoughts that suggest I have no business being here if this is who I am. I'm going crazy.

Show more...Show less...Show more...

I'm sorry to hear that you feel that way. You seem like such a kind and caring, deeply introspective person, based on your posts.

I've also struggled heavily with self-acceptance in the past. Although it was my husband's words that acted as a catalyst to shatter and put an end to that, what set the groundwork for me to let go of those negative feelings was my realisation that the reason I believed myself to be wrong, was that I believed the world to be wrong; unfairly so.

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I feel the same way about what others might think of me, and then it's a vile and despicable series of combinations that lead nowhere. This is the worst, I know what it is, yet it is so often so hopeless. My Guardian also often tells me that it's totally unnecessary and that I see things as darker than they really are, only after a while such thoughts "come up" again.