You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
magus.immortalis16 min to read
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced. The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it. It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal. My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced. The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it. It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal. My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Allison, Magis is a female :) lol But Cats rock. I have little cat statues and a little space dedicated to her it is where my cat drinks from her water bowl :)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 1:21 PM EDT Allison P wrote:
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Allison, Magis is a female :) lol But Cats rock. I have little cat statues and a little space dedicated to her it is where my cat drinks from her water bowl :)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 1:21 PM EDT Allison P wrote:
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Oopsies. Sorry Sister! i had a feeling that as soon as I wrote
"Brother" that that was wrong. But no harm done...heh.
Yes, kitties are awesome! I have been thinking of volunteering at my
local shelter. They have volunteers that come in and brush them etc.
If I can't hae one now, maybe I can at least be with them that way.
And later, I can try again to have one for a pet. ^ Hail Father Satan
always! Hail Lord Andras!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Allison, Magis is a female :) lol But Cats rock. I have little cat statues
and a little space dedicated to her it is where my cat drinks from her water
bowl :)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 1:21 PM EDT Allison P wrote:
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth
spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green
and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside
on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals
so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and
internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions
to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck
it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding
myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You
have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's
from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this
evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle
of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I
didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and
critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore
I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I
am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of
the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of
soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like
emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Oopsies. Sorry Sister! i had a feeling that as soon as I wrote
"Brother" that that was wrong. But no harm done...heh.
Yes, kitties are awesome! I have been thinking of volunteering at my
local shelter. They have volunteers that come in and brush them etc.
If I can't hae one now, maybe I can at least be with them that way.
And later, I can try again to have one for a pet. ^ Hail Father Satan
always! Hail Lord Andras!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Allison, Magis is a female :) lol But Cats rock. I have little cat statues
and a little space dedicated to her it is where my cat drinks from her water
bowl :)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 1:21 PM EDT Allison P wrote:
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth
spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green
and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside
on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals
so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and
internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions
to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck
it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding
myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You
have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's
from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this
evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle
of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I
didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and
critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore
I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I
am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of
the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of
soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like
emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Thanks Shannon. ^.^
Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 12:30:07 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Thanks Shannon. ^.^
Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 12:30:07 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol. That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in. But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
From: Allison P <apocalypseofjon@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol. That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in. But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
From: Allison P <apocalypseofjon@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
From: Allison P <apocalypseofjon@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
From: Allison P <apocalypseofjon@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
My cat doesny like going outside lol just looking out the window. And yes cats do survive longer in doors. Cats are so unique looking :) So exotic looking :) When I was younger I always loved cats and would feed them out on the street.
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 2:55 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
My cat doesny like going outside lol just looking out the window. And yes cats do survive longer in doors. Cats are so unique looking :) So exotic looking :) When I was younger I always loved cats and would feed them out on the street.
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 2:55 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Haha, you're welcome Shannon. I listen to these when I meditate. These songs change my mood and make me feel better when I am hurting or down, and soothe the pain when it hurts physically. I read once in a study that listening to music lessens the effects of physical pain. Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:24:44 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Haha, you're welcome Shannon. I listen to these when I meditate. These songs change my mood and make me feel better when I am hurting or down, and soothe the pain when it hurts physically. I read once in a study that listening to music lessens the effects of physical pain. Hail Satan!
From: Shannon Outlaw <soutlaw92@...
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:24:44 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Great :) I LOVE listening to eastern meditational music while meditating. It is SOMETHING else! <3 Ill put these mantras on my mp3 and listen to it in my way to work etc. :D it will make me think of Father and keep me feeling elevated and soothed ;)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:30 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Haha, you're welcome Shannon. I listen to these when I meditate. These songs change my mood and make me feel better when I am hurting or down, and soothe the pain when it hurts physically.
I read once in a study that listening to music lessens the effects of physical pain.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:24:44 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Great :) I LOVE listening to eastern meditational music while meditating. It is SOMETHING else! <3 Ill put these mantras on my mp3 and listen to it in my way to work etc. :D it will make me think of Father and keep me feeling elevated and soothed ;)
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:30 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Haha, you're welcome Shannon. I listen to these when I meditate. These songs change my mood and make me feel better when I am hurting or down, and soothe the pain when it hurts physically.
I read once in a study that listening to music lessens the effects of physical pain.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:24:44 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Thanks for the links Magus!!!!! :D yeah! <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 3:17 PM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmGDFVgE ... cg&index=4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VniEODE4 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wVi5NeY3 ... QyKm3kXRcg
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aq-CKdT6 ... QyKm3kXRcg
Enjoy. :)
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 3:11:00 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
Well, i'm glad. :) I'd like to get some mantras that praise Lord
Shiva, specially when I found out that Shiva is really Father Satan;
but I haven't had much finding any. I tried looking on Youtube, but I
guess I didn't put in the right things. Lol. Do you know of any
offhand? Hail Father Satan always!
On 3/24/13, Magus Immortalis <[ email redacted ] wrote:
I adore cats, I think they are most perfect creatures in all ways, lol.
That is the thing with cats, I find that they always want to run out and
escape. In my experience, I find that they have longer lives when you keep
them indoors. When I had a house, I would let my cat Smokey outside (we had
a backyard.) And every day, in the late afternoon or early evening, she
would wait outside the glass patio/balcony door to be let back in.
But I wasn't thinking. Our neighbourhood is surrounded by dogs, and one day
she came back and wouldn't eat for a few days. My dad reached over to pet
her and saw she had open wounds and it was bleeding a bit. Likely she got in
a fight with one of the dogs. My parents washed the wound and force fed her
with an eye dropper, after they found out how much the vet hospital was
charging for overnight fees and medication. She healed and lived a bit
longer (she passed from kidney or liver failure at age 18.)
I live in an apartment now and the neighbour down the hall opened the door
to go in and her cat ran out! And this lovely ginger cat was meowing and I
just got out of the elevator. And this cat kept going back to the apartment
door and meowing at it, so I knocked on the door and asked the tenant if
that was their cat. It was.
Music also comforts me. When I was going through some harder times, I would
listen to long mantras praising Lord Shiva. It really helped.
Thanks Allison <3 Your words help and comfort me.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Allison P <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Sunday, March 24, 2013 1:21:39 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
I love cats as well. They are so nice, soft and friendly...and warm. I
want to have one for a pet, but the last two times I tried they
disappeared. I mean, I let them out one day and they never came back.
*sigh* I don't know what happened to them in the end, but I hope that
they are all right. But anyways, back to the main point...I too find
the ocean healing, water in general. I love to be in the water, even
though ironically I cannot swim very well at all. Lol. But it still
makes me feel good, just to be in the water and let it flow over me.
And listening to music is also healing to me; I used to want to play
it, I played the piano from when I was little, but that desire has
gone away. Since sixth grade or so I've not really wanted to play an
instrument, but I love to listen to all kinds of music. It comforts
me.
Oh, and Magus: I am not at your level yet, I mean with my serpent.
It'll take me a while to get there, I know. But I will get there in
the end. So, whilst I can't personally not know what you are going
through specifically, I just wanted to say I know you will get past
it. We all feel weak sometimes, unfortunately, (I know I do), but no
man is an island. I forget who originally said that, but I do think
it's true. It may hurrt terribly now, but you will get past it, and
emerge stronger as a result. You will be as the phoenix is, reborn
from the ashes of the old self, as it were. And we are all here for
you, don't forget that Brother! I hope my words help in some way. Hang
in there, and know that we all love you! Hail Father Satan always!
Hail lord Andras! Hail Sorath, the one who burns!
On 3/24/13, Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ] wrote:
Very beautiful Magus <3
------------------------------
On Sun, Mar 24, 2013 11:42 AM EDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
Sometimes I read some books and they are so cringeworthy I want to fling
it
across the room. I only read up to 45 pages in this book and the guided
meditation on the chapter about the Birch tree is so new age, love and
light...I winced.
The correspondences are interesting though. I paid $10 for this book and
I
am starting to wonder if it was too much (it is $21 CDN).
If you can get this from a library, or spend a few hours at Barnes and
Nobles to read it, it would be better. I don't think it's worth spending
that much money on it.
It's up to you though. -shrugs-
http://www.amazon.com/The-Healing-Power ... r+of+trees
My father has some plants in our home, they are well taken care of and I
find it very peaceful to be around them. They are always shiny green and
alive, even in the dead of winter. I love cats, when I lived with my ex
I
would pet them and spend time with them and that was very healing and
wonderful. I also like to be by the ocean and in the water, and just
melt
into it. I also like candlelight, like you. When I do rituals outside on
my balcony and light incense at the nighttime, it's so magickal.
My Guardians have suggested to me to look into tree-planting programs in
my
city. Now that it is warmer I might just do that. It's not much to help
the earth but I want to donate my time and effort instead of money. I
think I might make some friends that way. ^.^
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: Shannon Outlaw <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Saturday, March 23, 2013 11:28:10 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and
Advice?
Magus, what is the name of the book excatly. I love nature and animals so
this is exciting. I would have to say that being around plants nature
and
animals feel me with an inner joy. Especially the plants I have in my
window garden. What heals me is meditatung whilst listening to trancey
eastern meditational music. Candle light has an effect on me too. Being
around the sun and breathung it in makes me feel peaceful and internally
whole. :) Standind under trees makes me feel as if im standing under a
guardian. A grandfather. Touching them feels nice. A while ago I poated
about communicating with plants and trees :) . Years back before even
dedicating to Satan, I read about deforestation.and for a while I would
cry and feel devastated. It hurt me very much. Animals and nature are
most
sacred. The earth as a whole is precious and it TEARSME UP inside to
whats happening to her.
------------------------------
On Sat, Mar 23, 2013 10:24 PM EDT magus.immortalis wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one.
Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to
the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness,
loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster
but
my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well
-shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably
thinking-
"you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it
up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong!
And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In
fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself
with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB.
(As
if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my
chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at
some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have
been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong
friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave
you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life
that
has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from
this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of
my
stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It
scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening,
as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to
write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in
some
way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt
like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in
and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation.
Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the
physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere
else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very
hard
in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same
time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of
sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before
this
happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't
get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was
composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it
was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and
very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that
I
do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion.
They
know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent
with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher
asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you
go
to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden,
and
you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some
visceral
level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my
repetoire
could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me
too.
Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a
brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They
always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for
some
now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical
thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I
cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I
believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I
always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am
not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the
oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went
up
to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my
name
and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always
feel
lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul.
One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree
understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion
and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to
communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full
and
the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my
parents
to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better.
It
must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power
meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your
experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
Music is pretty powerful, in my opinion. I find meanings through music and strength. My own personal experience.
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
Music is pretty powerful, in my opinion. I find meanings through music and strength. My own personal experience.
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
From: "enkisson_descarte_666@..." <enkisson_descarte_666@...
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
From: "enkisson_descarte_666@..." <enkisson_descarte_666@...
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
You will not regret dedicating yourself to martial arts. If you can combine martial arts with yoga and power meditation you are bound to reach unparalleled levels of bliss and euphoria. Martial arts would be a much smarter choice though.
And thank you for posting it. When other people open up I feel like I can do the same. I don't feel so alone you know.
------------------------------
On Wed, Mar 27, 2013 6:27 PM PDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: "[ email redacted ]" <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and
fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
You will not regret dedicating yourself to martial arts. If you can combine martial arts with yoga and power meditation you are bound to reach unparalleled levels of bliss and euphoria. Martial arts would be a much smarter choice though.
And thank you for posting it. When other people open up I feel like I can do the same. I don't feel so alone you know.
------------------------------
On Wed, Mar 27, 2013 6:27 PM PDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: "[ email redacted ]" <[ email redacted ]
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and
fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@... wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
I really enjoyed it. At one point I was taking Kendo and Iaido. But this was before I became a Satanist. I left Iaido because you know how dojos are supposed to feel like a second home? Well, the place where I went didn't. My teacher was afraid of me for some reason because his "spirit guide" told him something about me. Lies, of course.
And this other teacher who was there, would watch me discreetly while he was warming up.
I never felt welcome there, so I left.
The same thing happened with my Kendo classes, but it wasn't so bad. Once I save up enough money I might get back into it.
I enjoy sharing my thoughts, experiences and stories, but I think that was a mistake on my part, now. It's dangerous to reveal too much about ourselves on these forums.
We're all in this together, Brother. And we have Lord Satan and the Gods with us! Hail Satan!
--- In , Enkiss on Descarte <enkisson_descarte_666@... wrote:
You will not regret dedicating yourself to martial arts. If you can combine martial arts with yoga and power meditation you are bound to reach unparalleled levels of bliss and euphoria. Martial arts would be a much smarter choice though.
And thank you for posting it. When other people open up I feel like I can do the same. I don't feel so alone you know.
------------------------------
On Wed, Mar 27, 2013 6:27 PM PDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: "enkisson_descarte_666@..." <enkisson_descarte_666@...
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and
fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@ wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!
0
I really enjoyed it. At one point I was taking Kendo and Iaido. But this was before I became a Satanist. I left Iaido because you know how dojos are supposed to feel like a second home? Well, the place where I went didn't. My teacher was afraid of me for some reason because his "spirit guide" told him something about me. Lies, of course.
And this other teacher who was there, would watch me discreetly while he was warming up.
I never felt welcome there, so I left.
The same thing happened with my Kendo classes, but it wasn't so bad. Once I save up enough money I might get back into it.
I enjoy sharing my thoughts, experiences and stories, but I think that was a mistake on my part, now. It's dangerous to reveal too much about ourselves on these forums.
We're all in this together, Brother. And we have Lord Satan and the Gods with us! Hail Satan!
--- In , Enkiss on Descarte <enkisson_descarte_666@... wrote:
You will not regret dedicating yourself to martial arts. If you can combine martial arts with yoga and power meditation you are bound to reach unparalleled levels of bliss and euphoria. Martial arts would be a much smarter choice though.
And thank you for posting it. When other people open up I feel like I can do the same. I don't feel so alone you know.
------------------------------
On Wed, Mar 27, 2013 6:27 PM PDT Magus Immortalis wrote:
I keep getting the nudge to do more exercise, maybe take up some form of martial arts. I feel it would probably help me too. I am glad to hear that music and athletic activity help you. I tried taking up the violin for a time but my fingers and hand were not up to it.
Thank you for reading my post Enkisson. And thank for sharing your story.
Hail Satan!
________________________________
From: "enkisson_descarte_666@..." <enkisson_descarte_666@...
To:
Sent: Monday, March 25, 2013 5:43:40 PM
Subject: Re: Healing at the Soul Level-Thoughts and Advice?
This is a very beautiful post Magus. You deserve a lot of respect for opening up like this. Anyone who thinks you are weak for expressing your feelings because you are a Satanist doesn't know what Satanism is all about. In fact it makes you stronger. I am going through the same thing and I am going through extremely slow changes that will mold me into a new person.
Music and athletic activity is what helps me. It helps me more than any drug or therapist ever could. It took me awhile to reach this point though. In fact it seems we have similarities. I managed to keep skyrim in my closet in a duffle bag ^.^... I might have to do a binding ritual on that game lol! I have been changing so much that it is ridiculous. Compared to 1 year ago I am a completely different person. I have found it is the things that a person does is what makes them. 1 year ago I was a death metal fanatic and wore all black and enjoyed hitting inanimate objects. Now I am in love with Trees, Animals, and Viloin. I would consider some christians inanimate objects right? Still listen to death metal though..
I also have a problem that hopefully will be fixed. I put up a shell of complete unemotionalism so that no one can reach my propensity. I try to hide my true feelings to the point that it seems like I have none. At one point I was even convinced that I would never truly be happy. Everytime I looked at people I Had to create a fake smile and even a fake laugh. Everyone around me seemed so happy yet it was artificial happiness. I could see through it because I had become a pro at it. I noticed this in people who didn't even have real problems. This made me wonder what chance I had of happiness if people who had never felt complete solitary and genuine usefullness.
With Satan all of these things will eventually dissappear.
Eventually i will be a completely new person. A clean person. Since the day of my birth i was alone. My dad was in prison and had all sorts of drug and personality problems. He couldn't even take control of his own life let alone a child's. My mother which I don't know anything about gave up her parental rights as soon as she was done recuperating from the repercussions of birth. Consequently I went to a foster home because my father was unknown since he was not on my birth certificate. From that point I was in and out of foster homes until I was 4 years old. The psychological effects of this kind of external surroundings of a child is scarring to say the least.
It all got way worst when My dad's brother took me in from Health and Human Services since they couldn't find a foster home for me at the time. My dad's brother has extreme problems and used to beat his siblings during his childhood and he had all sorts of other problems. At the time he worked for a truck driving company. He was gone all the time and his wife was responsible for taking care of me. This women was extremley cruel and hated me with every inch of heart. She definitely showed me this. I used to have my coloring books ripped up, I would get beatings for any little things, I would be locked in my room, and she would even resort to calling me names. Not to mention every other member of her family HATED me. My dad's brother was gone all the time so he was ignorant of what was going on. This lady used to make me read the bible and other books from the time I got home from the little country school to the time I went to bed. I was too young and
fragile to do anything. There was even a point of time when this lady starved me for about a month and only gave me a Gatorade bottle of water that I could refill everyday. After a week or so the hunger took over my fear of disobeying her and I started to steal food. It would be the only reason why I breathe now. This continued until I ran away when I was 12. I was sent away and I have been to group homes, juvenile detention centers, and other foster homes. Just an extremely dry cut reason why I need to heal.
The good thing is that I do have a god that loves me very much and has my interests in his best interest. The same can be said about me to him. It is amazing that I still have my sanity and a completely healthy and strong body. Good Genes probably;).Sadly good genes does not heal lonliness. Even when I had Girlfriends while I was an atheist I still felt alone. Since of late I have not been able to put up with christians because they disgust me. How can I bond with someone if I hate what they stand for. Everyone here is cristian and it is sickening. Just remember you are not alone in the lonliness that we all share.^
--- In , "magus.immortalis" <magus.immortalis@ wrote:
You're probably used to my long posts by now, so here's another one. Lol.
I understand that the Kundalini awakening process drudges up emotions to the surface, a variety of them: anger, love, bliss, ecstasy, sadness, loneliness, to name a few.
It's a long process, and it's slow (for me...I wish it would go faster but my Serpent knows what is best...likely it's the proper pace.)
I hate to sound like a whimpering child (I probably will, but oh well -shrugs-), but I feel like my soul is hurting. You're probably thinking- "you're a Satanist, you're supposed to be strong, deal with it. Suck it up like the soldier you're supposed to be. Satanism is for the strong! And we are the strongest of the strong!"
Yeah, I know. I know. But I have not been dealing with it face-on. In fact, I have been distracting myself and studying. Force-feeding myself with funny videos and 9gag.com. Telling jokes with my friends on FB. (As if laughter will chase away the hurt and close up the hole in my chest.)
Distracting myself with Skyrim. Anything to get away from myself.
But you cannot get away from yourself forever. You have to face it at some point.
The best way to describe the way I feel is this example:
You love someone with all your heart and being. You trust them. You have been with them/known them for many years. You have a strong friendship/relationship. And then one day, they betray you. They leave you, and you are hurting from the inside out. It hurts in your chest.
That's the kind of emotional pain I am talking about.
The only thing is, that's not my situation. There's no one in my life that has done this to me at the moment. But that's how I feel, and it's from this current life and likely from past ones too.
It feels like a knife in my heart, only my heart takes up the whole of my stomach and chest. It just hurts so much and it's unfamiliar to me. It scares me a bit. I don't really want to deal with it. But this evening, as I was practicing harp, my Guardians tell me in a thought package to write about this in the group. So yeah. It's time to deal with it.
I know that power meditation and hatha and kundalini yoga heal you in some way. One time I was doing hatha yoga and I started crying, and it felt like I was healing somehow. I caught a glimpse of a past life.
Over 1.5 years ago I was in front of my computer, headphones plugged in and listening to music. I listen to music when I do power meditation. Makes it more pleasant.
I start breaking down and crying, from the depths of my soul. And the physical world wavered, and it was like I was someone else, somewhere else, in a different time. Another past life. And I was crying very hard in this past life, like I was doing in my current one, at the same time.
After I finished crying, I felt better, like I had passed an obstacle of sorts.
Lord Horus was very kind and I think it was He who visited me before this happened. It was very brief, but I felt His kindness and love.
Like He was telling me that everything would be okay. Of course I didn't get it until after my crying spell.
In early February or March 2011, Lord Satan came to me while I was composing at the piano and He said, "music will heal you." (I think it was Him, at least. It sounded like Him. His voice is medium-toned and very kind and understanding.)
I stopped composing music. Now I play the harp. My Guardians insist that I do not give it up. They have told me this on more then one occasion. They know what is best for me, so I listen. Although I am not as consistent with it as I should be. But I find playing music healing. My teacher asked me if I wanted to take classes in harp therapy. That is when you go to sick people, elderly folk or those with cancer or are bed-ridden, and you play the harp for them. It is supposed to heal them on some visceral level.
I am not that good, I only started the harp in June 2012. And my repetoire could be bigger. But if the harp heals them, surely it will heal me too. Not sure if I will take these classes yet.
My Guardians have pointed out this book on Trees and healing. I got a brand new copy at a second hand bookstore for a discounted price. They always pulled my eyes towards this book in different bookstores for some now. And FINALLY I caught on and bought it.
It's a bit new-agey but if I apply Satanic principles to it and critical thinking and reading, I am sure to get something out of it. Therefore I cannot recommend it because I haven't finished reading it yet.
But in my experience, I find trees pleasant friends to be around. I believe each has their own spirit and personality. There is one that I always go to in the park about 20 minutes drive from where I live. I am not sure what tree it is, but my dad said it is one of the types of the oldest trees in the world. This was in late 2011 or early 2012. I went up to this tree and made friends with it. I touched it, and told it my name and how I was doing. It likes me. After communing with it, I always feel lighter, better, stronger, more clear of mind and not as heavy of soul. One time I told it some things, and started crying a bit. This tree understood me. They communicate not in words but something like emotion and expression without words. It's hard to explain. You'd have to communicate with a tree to get what I mean.
I find walking in parks helps. Once the snow melts, spring is in full and the trees have awakened from their winter slumber, I will bug my parents to take us every week for a walk in the park.
I find that being in nature really helps me in some way. I feel better. It must be the air, the environment.
So, for me, music and trees are very healing for me. So are power meditation and yoga.
What about you? What heals your soul? Do you want to share your experiences?
Hail Satan! Hail the Powers of Hell!