Shadowcat said:Jack said:This Guilt is from the false sense of morality that says that one man can be with only one woman. Women should understand that men still love them and come back to them at the end of the day. It's not cheating if they don't leave their wife. But if the wife makes a big deal about it might destroy the relationship and he might leave her. In my opinion if it's consensual then the arrangement of a marriage and relationship can change ,with the knowledge of both parties I.e. Again it's not cheating if the woman knows about it.Shadowcat said:also wanted to ellaborate here specifically.
i think this is a horrid rebuttal and defense of him. he knows its not acceptable and has let those feelings happen anyway. people who talk like this are looking for justification much of the time to not feel guilty. and jack was giving him just that in his comment which is disgusting. i wonder why you didnt go off on him instead? you dont have to physically touch someone to cheat.
he actyally writes that he doesnt know if this is a good thing or not
Seriously? yet he is married and in a monogomous arragement with someone. If you yourself are actually Zevism you will know better and see through things like this through a decent code of morals opposed to some people who apparenly think things such as this are relative when the Gods themselves teach humans actual ethics, and won't be trying to make excuses for people who stoop to this level. you get on me for "starting shit" and "projecting" but you know what? i'm harder on Zevism because i expect more from them as Gods in the making.
If its consensual its not cheating. However if one party strictly wishes to remain monogamous and the other does not and it leads to separation then this is for the best. I also will never agree with double standards.
I will not say it's impossible for conditions for a marriage to change at least amoung us mortals seeing as humans are fickle and change all the time, and again it is fine if it is consensual. My point however is there will usually be indicators of weather or not it's appropriate to interpret if it's ok to change the dynamics of the relationship and how ones partner should be sensitive to this. Most oftentimes people in monogamous arrangements want to stay as such unless they've lied to themselves about who and what they really want and why. The latter I call closet polys.
I think this is something that can be properly seeing from studying ones partner early on even before things get serious including eachothers charts. And knowing a good picture of what one wants out of life in the relationship aspect and how this might change. This requires the utmost honesty early on.
Monogamy is also not for everyone and there is nothing fundementally wrong with open relationships. If someone has multiple partners and everyone involved knows this and consents this is fine. Some people actually find it cozy to love more than one person with their multiple partners feeling the same. and others find this stretches them too thin.
I have always felt that cheating starts in the thoughts personally and some disagree. If I have a partner and know that his thoughts are going to other women or comparing me to them I emotionally shut off irreversibly and tell him to pursue who he really wants. I refuse to fight for someone that doesn't see me as his first choice. I know for certain I am monogamous in thought and action when I get serious and expect the same in return. If that's broken it's over.
Don't answer this but I'm pretty certain you have a gemini or at least an air venus or alot of air in general. Perceptions of love and relationships are also heavily influenced by the chart.
In love I have always found air off putting due to its fickle and detached nature with libra being an exception.
The problem with such an agreement is that something unexpected and unwanted may arise with another person. This could ruin the marriage.
Simple friendships take time and attention to keep alive, love obviously requires more. Imagine spending your free time with your lover friend or what it is, if it is not another partner, instead of with your partner. I do not like and am not interested in such a relationship.
There is no middle ground between monogamy and polygamy, either you are monogamous or you are not. This does not mean forever but for a lifetime or more, or other time interval regarding beings who are also physically immortal.
What do you think about the idea of living forever with a person?
