Eternal Failure

[SoulSails13]

I feel as if it is impossible for me to achieve anything, because, as soon as I try, something happens that makes it almost, if not outright impossible.
I have finally mustered up what little discipline I have, to start doing proper workings on myself, and now I found out that I won't even have a calendar anymore.
So I guess that's it, I'm just such useless fucking dredge that I can't even do the most basic things right!
Honestly, I deserve complete dissipation for how utterly pathetic I am.

 

[Yagami Light]

Hello Brother/Sister.
To start off, why do you say there won't be a calendar this year? If there isn't an official announcement by our High Priests or SGs, then we can't know about it. We have to be patient.

Secondly, the calendar wasn't always a part of ToZ. In fact, I and many other Zevists used to schedule our workings by looking at a website online what zodiac sign the moon was in and when it was void of course (to avoid beginning things at that time). High Priestess Maxine has an article about what each zodiac sign represents and how we should schedule our workings: https://templeofzeus.org/Timing
It is so simple and easy to understand. We may have gotten used to the ToZ calendar, but no one prevents us from doing magical workings without it. The general information about moon signs and void moon (and Mercury retrograde and everything) is freely available online. We just need to put a little more extra effort to find something reliable (I always double check a website with other websites to see that the hours correspond). Make sure your insert your country/city and local hour.

Now, when it comes to meeting with obstacles when you want to do something positive for you, in the beginning of our journey in Zevism and meditation, it is normal for that to happen. Depending on our upbringing and childhood, but also on our past lives' experiences, there can be subconscious residues of an "opposing force" that makes things difficult.
In addition, when we start meditating, suppressed emotions and thoughts will come to the surface - and you may experience some delays or difficulties that will, in time, dissipate.

This is all part of the healing process. It's not something bad- just a little irksome. It doesn't happen only to you - it happens to everyone.

Please, be more patient with yourself and with your meditative journey. There's no need to think so badly of yourself. The Gods have guided you here - and they wouldn't do it for someone who is "pathetic." The Gods and Goddesses see value in you.

Continue with your meditative journey and be patient, Brother/Sister. It's after the storm, when the rainbow appears.

 

[AFODO]

I understand you are frustrated but this is just how life is sometimes. Don't worry, don't be negative, everything is gonna be just fine and yes you gonna achieve whatever you want, given you are not giving up.

Make sure to do the basic things, clean yourself and keep your energies high, do as well some breathing exercises and proper meditation. You can do deep cleaning every saturday and empower one chakra per day. Sunday - Sun chakra, Monday - 6th chakra, etc.

As Yagami said, it is not gonna be impossible to time their magic for non-donors, plus everyone who is not underage can probably afford to be a tier 1 donor. I don't know numbers and exactly how it works but I think you become a tier 1 donor even if you have donated like 10 dollar. For how much time, idk but again I think everyone can afford it. It's just a choice.

 

[卐 Null Sechs 卍]

Don't worry about the lack of a calendar, as mentioned:
Tagami Light and AFODO
See above

In the meantime, you can track the Moon’s course using apps like Moonlight. I use this app because it’s one of the simplest and most readable ones I’ve found. Unfortunately, that specific app is paid, but you can find the Moon's trajectory for free on various websites. For planning your rituals, any digital or physical calendar will suffice.
If you are unsure about the schedules, you can always ask here on the forum, but you should strive for self-reliance. Independence and taking initiative are qualities that truly please the High God Zeus.
Furthermore, you shouldn't speak so poorly of yourself. By doing so, you are actively lowering your vibrations. The Gods want us to become like Them, not to drag ourselves down. The first thing you should do is perform an aura cleaning. You also need to work on your mindset, specifically regarding self-esteem and productivity.
If you improve your productivity, your self-esteem will naturally follow. At the same time, work on your sense of self-worth and emotional control. Start planning your rituals properly, and you will see that you can manage even without a dedicated calendar.
Hail Satan!

 

[SoulSails13]

I thank both of you for your responses: I will give a more detailed reply tomorrow.