I completely understand, Zoalaluckystar. Satan has been there for me, even when my problems were the result of my stupidity. And, now that I'm trying even harder, He is even better.
It's to the point now, for me, when I see and hear others blaspheming Satan as "evil," I just want to scream. But then, someone or something comes over me, reminding me it's better to remain silent and let people discover I belong to Him AFTER they've gotten to know me.
I, too, was one of those who initially came to Satan for self-service reasons. And, since then, I've come to understand that this wasn't what I initially thought it was about. I certainly did not get what I thought I wanted, then. In fact, I've learned why what I thought I wanted back then, wasn't really.
And I am fine with it. Who knows what kind of mess I would have made had my every wish been granted, back when I was still diseased.
But, those things and, the help I really needed, since, Satan and the Gods have helped me with, beyond my expectations. Sometimes, even just showing me how to do what I must, myself has proven to be the greater gift.
Let me stop now, because I think I could go on for days and days and days...ha-ha.
Hail Father Satan, forever!