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Loneliness, Hopelessness, Pain

satou

Active member
Joined
Mar 24, 2022
Messages
374
Feeling weak, even though I am not, but probably I am. I just can't describe this loneliness anymore. I hate small talk and other shit. Like, why would I even do that. These people are just waiting their death. I swear I fucking hate stupidity. And guess who feels the stupidest? Me. I just have enough awareness to see that life is pain and nothing else. I just can understand basics, nothing else. I want to understand more but, dude, look at my "life". Everywhere feels like prison.

Souls getting torturing in physical chaos. Some funny shit happens and then, you died. Everyone is in pain but no one tries to understand each other. That fucking deep hopelessness. That never-ending fear. I just want this shit to end. People can't realize that they are in hell. I swear I born this way. I just wanna fight. Even though I can't recognize myself anymore, I just want to fight. I am nothing more than awareness and pain. I will just fight. I am glad I am a human. I love existing as a human. These people still can't understand what being human means. Being a gentile human and being a Satanist is the best thing ever. I just want people to understand this and I want them to be real humans. As we spiritually evolve we become more of ourselves..

I am very tired.. I want people to be brighter. This way, I just feel lonely. This is a spiritual loneliness. This is awareness difference. In order to not feel lonely, we need humans. But sadly these people are not real humans.. To not feel lonely, we need light, and these people are not bright. I swear everyone is like npc.

These people can't understand that this is about their existence. They are just not evolving their souls. This is literally the most important shit.

Seriously what the fuck is going on. Billions of people. Okay, not all of them are stupid but still, they don't have any path in life. I just want this fucking thing to end and everyone to be happy. I want this thing to remain as just a bad memory. We are talking about eternal life. We know the existence of eternal life.

I am feeling like only I am like this. I don't want to be a part of this "life". Be born, feel depressed, then die. No awareness = happiness. Rules of this world. Happiness is rare and temporary. I can feel pain of other people and it hurts me so much. I know what real loneliness is, what fear of dying is. I can understand what feeling of emptiness is. I know what real jealously is. Having a bit awareness and some feelings is just too painful. Every good thing inevitably turns into a poison.

We are seperated from each other but, our souls are actually connected. I know this. Being so unique is a bit painful.. I had nothing in the beginning but I chose fighting. I chose to be unique and now I am. We are who never lost our hopes. We were just born for this. Pain is just makes us stronger. But, I, really feel tired. I have nowhere to go other than here. This is our temple.. Outside feels like hell. I can understand the meaning of this. I want to see here as home.. We can't fight alone, right? We are here to support each other. We are a family. We have nowhere to go else.
 
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=88707

You should do such work with the Wunjo rune, probably for several months.
 
Wotanwarrior said:
https://ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=88707

You should do such work with the Wunjo rune, probably for several months.

Feels so much like a temporary solution... I am not against, but I mean, I will still be aware of everything. Heaven simulator in hell. Sometimes just talking even heals. I don't want butterflies in my head.
 
As Wotanwarrior pointed out above, this working will help you.
Also keep your energies high. https://satanslibrary.org/Rtrs/Raising_Energies.html so you not fall in depression.

This is one of the most difficult part of our path. You need to overcome this. Learn stoicism, and practice it.

Everything is under the controll of the gods - fully. They know what will happen, and how. For them, it's just a short phase.
Humanity will grow out of this misery. You have to ignore the "hell" thats going on, and focus on your development, and how can you help people. You are, and we are writing history. A time will come where we are considered as heros. All of us.

With this in mind, you should not fall into tears, thinking that everything is hopeless and doomed. Humanity is not hopeless, in fact, winning is guarantee if we are keep fighting. Nothing can stop us.

This place will only grow from here. We are here for each other, and that is needed.
In the east a lot of Satanic thing is still living. We are very far from being wiped out from this planet.

Keep it up, and be strong. Think racionally and do not fall into your mind's trap.
 
satou said:

We must be the leaders that help pull people out of the mud. There is only so much that can be done, and later Rituals we perform can help wake everyone out more efficiently.

Stay focused on what you can feasibly help change for the better, though this will take some introspection and meditation to find where you can help best.
 
satou said:
Feels so much like a temporary solution... I am not against, but I mean, I will still be aware of everything. Heaven simulator in hell. Sometimes just talking even heals. I don't want butterflies in my head.
When energy work is done for a longer period of time then the result is permanent.

Other than that I wanted to say that how you feel is not who you are, but what you are going through. You can make it, and there is a purpose for your life. Take care.
 
AFODO said:
As Wotanwarrior pointed out above, this working will help you.
Also keep your energies high. https://satanslibrary.org/Rtrs/Raising_Energies.html so you not fall in depression.

This is one of the most difficult part of our path. You need to overcome this. Learn stoicism, and practice it.

Everything is under the controll of the gods - fully. They know what will happen, and how. For them, it's just a short phase.
Humanity will grow out of this misery. You have to ignore the "hell" thats going on, and focus on your development, and how can you help people. You are, and we are writing history. A time will come where we are considered as heros. All of us.

With this in mind, you should not fall into tears, thinking that everything is hopeless and doomed. Humanity is not hopeless, in fact, winning is guarantee if we are keep fighting. Nothing can stop us.

This place will only grow from here. We are here for each other, and that is needed.
In the east a lot of Satanic thing is still living. We are very far from being wiped out from this planet.

Keep it up, and be strong. Think racionally and do not fall into your mind's trap.

Thank you..

Being so different is really hard. I just hate this loneliness. Also I can't understand myself anymore. My thoughts about death has changed too much. People are gonna die someday and this seems too meaningless to me. How do they live knowing that? I don't know why my perspection has changed this much.

This just doesn't make any sense. None of this. Beside that, I am feeling very vulnerable. Even Gods scare me. This is meaningless but I just can't stop feeling like that.

I have lots of knowledge but I am still feeling too weak. Gods know almost everything. I can't stop the urge to understand everything. That will sound weird but even technology scares me.

What have I become? I don't think this is just some depression. Big changes in perspection. Feeling weak, dumb, vulnerable. Urge to understand everything. I don't know what to do anymore. What is this fucking shit. Something like, Kundalini? My body already feels hot whenever I do yoga. I don't know what will happen in the end. I can't stand anymore. Someone needs to guide me about this.. My perspection will never change back..
 
satou said:
AFODO said:
As Wotanwarrior pointed out above, this working will help you.
Also keep your energies high. https://satanslibrary.org/Rtrs/Raising_Energies.html so you not fall in depression.

This is one of the most difficult part of our path. You need to overcome this. Learn stoicism, and practice it.

Everything is under the controll of the gods - fully. They know what will happen, and how. For them, it's just a short phase.
Humanity will grow out of this misery. You have to ignore the "hell" thats going on, and focus on your development, and how can you help people. You are, and we are writing history. A time will come where we are considered as heros. All of us.

With this in mind, you should not fall into tears, thinking that everything is hopeless and doomed. Humanity is not hopeless, in fact, winning is guarantee if we are keep fighting. Nothing can stop us.

This place will only grow from here. We are here for each other, and that is needed.
In the east a lot of Satanic thing is still living. We are very far from being wiped out from this planet.

Keep it up, and be strong. Think racionally and do not fall into your mind's trap.

Thank you..

Being so different is really hard. I just hate this loneliness. Also I can't understand myself anymore. My thoughts about death has changed too much. People are gonna die someday and this seems too meaningless to me. How do they live knowing that? I don't know why my perspection has changed this much.

This just doesn't make any sense. None of this. Beside that, I am feeling very vulnerable. Even Gods scare me. This is meaningless but I just can't stop feeling like that.

I have lots of knowledge but I am still feeling too weak. Gods know almost everything. I can't stop the urge to understand everything. That will sound weird but even technology scares me.

What have I become? I don't think this is just some depression. Big changes in perspection. Feeling weak, dumb, vulnerable. Urge to understand everything. I don't know what to do anymore. What is this fucking shit. Something like, Kundalini? My body already feels hot whenever I do yoga. I don't know what will happen in the end. I can't stand anymore. Someone needs to guide me about this.. My perspection will never change back..

You can do Janus's ritual which can help you with changes.
I doubt you would feel weak from Kundalini, but it can dig up negative things from your soul thats for sure.
Death is not meaningless, the sad part is that they don't know what comes after death. I can't say anymore because I don't understand exactly your problem, but surly, being close to the Gods will help. Do them rituals, and tell them your problems. They will help with problems which are too big for you to handle in a short time, but they also want you to be able to solve your own problems. Being close to Gods in general will give you a lot of good things, and not just "solving problems".
 
AFODO said:
You can do Janus's ritual which can help you with changes.
I doubt you would feel weak from Kundalini, but it can dig up negative things from your soul thats for sure.
Death is not meaningless, the sad part is that they don't know what comes after death. I can't say anymore because I don't understand exactly your problem, but surly, being close to the Gods will help. Do them rituals, and tell them your problems. They will help with problems which are too big for you to handle in a short time, but they also want you to be able to solve your own problems. Being close to Gods in general will give you a lot of good things, and not just "solving problems".

Thank you for reminding me that I need guidance of Gods. This is exactly what I need to do. I already doubt I can handle these big changes. I hope everything will get better for me. Gods also can teach me more. I really love my Satanist brothers and our Gods <3
 
satou said:

You are feeling this suffering too intensely and falsely believing it will never change, or that it is not actively changing. This is just a matter of perspective and also understanding that people will slowly evolve out of their negative situations over a period of time.

Humanity has broken out of the miserable medieval conditions to bring about the Renaissance. In that period of time, most people were just illiterate peasants, crushed by the church. Yes, now we are in a digital nightmare, but there is much more opportunity for growth, which is why the enemy desperately tries to create excuses for removing this, like Covid and inflation.

People and human souls are resilient and can sustain some serious punishment, which had existed for many centuries before we were able to gain our spiritual foothold. So yes, there is suffering, but this can be safely ignored, knowing that it is not a permanent condition by any means.

As you mentioned the Gods, you have nothing to fear. Meditate on their sigil and pull their energy directly into your heart chakra, and you will feel close and loved by them. Don't ignore this.

Lastly, if your negative feelings are strong or persistent enough, then you should do a working with optimistic and blissful energies, such as Sowilo or Wunjo, respectively, or Fehu, and so on. Your mental state is important and should not feel continually hurt. There is always a way to improve.
 
satou said:
Feeling weak, even though I am not, but probably I am. I just can't describe this loneliness anymore. I hate small talk and other shit. Like, why would I even do that. These people are just waiting their death. I swear I fucking hate stupidity. And guess who feels the stupidest? Me. I just have enough awareness to see that life is pain and nothing else. I just can understand basics, nothing else. I want to understand more but, dude, look at my "life". Everywhere feels like prison.

Souls getting torturing in physical chaos. Some funny shit happens and then, you died. Everyone is in pain but no one tries to understand each other. That fucking deep hopelessness. That never-ending fear. I just want this shit to end. People can't realize that they are in hell. I swear I born this way. I just wanna fight. Even though I can't recognize myself anymore, I just want to fight. I am nothing more than awareness and pain. I will just fight. I am glad I am a human. I love existing as a human. These people still can't understand what being human means. Being a gentile human and being a Satanist is the best thing ever. I just want people to understand this and I want them to be real humans. As we spiritually evolve we become more of ourselves..

I am very tired.. I want people to be brighter. This way, I just feel lonely. This is a spiritual loneliness. This is awareness difference. In order to not feel lonely, we need humans. But sadly these people are not real humans.. To not feel lonely, we need light, and these people are not bright. I swear everyone is like npc.

These people can't understand that this is about their existence. They are just not evolving their souls. This is literally the most important shit.

Seriously what the fuck is going on. Billions of people. Okay, not all of them are stupid but still, they don't have any path in life. I just want this fucking thing to end and everyone to be happy. I want this thing to remain as just a bad memory. We are talking about eternal life. We know the existence of eternal life.

I am feeling like only I am like this. I don't want to be a part of this "life". Be born, feel depressed, then die. No awareness = happiness. Rules of this world. Happiness is rare and temporary. I can feel pain of other people and it hurts me so much. I know what real loneliness is, what fear of dying is. I can understand what feeling of emptiness is. I know what real jealously is. Having a bit awareness and some feelings is just too painful. Every good thing inevitably turns into a poison.

We are seperated from each other but, our souls are actually connected. I know this. Being so unique is a bit painful.. I had nothing in the beginning but I chose fighting. I chose to be unique and now I am. We are who never lost our hopes. We were just born for this. Pain is just makes us stronger. But, I, really feel tired. I have nowhere to go other than here. This is our temple.. Outside feels like hell. I can understand the meaning of this. I want to see here as home.. We can't fight alone, right? We are here to support each other. We are a family. We have nowhere to go else.
It is the fate of all spiritually advanced souls who reincarnate. You need to accept reality for what it is. And then try to find some semblance of happiness in small moments with your girlfriend/wife or family and try to find happiness in making them laugh and make them happy. Other than that Focus on spiritually advancing forward and acccept that possibly no one will understand you in your entire life and you cannot find solace in anyone else in the entire world. You will always be alone even with your wife and family. And be okay with that. Find happiness in small inconsequential things and just keep moving forward in the spiritual path. The only ones you can find solace in ,are the Gods. Only Lucifer ,the Lightbringer can heal your heart and give you peace. No one else.
 
Blitzkreig [JG said:
" post_id=461680 time=1694018297 user_id=21286]
satou said:

You are feeling this suffering too intensely and falsely believing it will never change, or that it is not actively changing. This is just a matter of perspective and also understanding that people will slowly evolve out of their negative situations over a period of time.

Humanity has broken out of the miserable medieval conditions to bring about the Renaissance. In that period of time, most people were just illiterate peasants, crushed by the church. Yes, now we are in a digital nightmare, but there is much more opportunity for growth, which is why the enemy desperately tries to create excuses for removing this, like Covid and inflation.

People and human souls are resilient and can sustain some serious punishment, which had existed for many centuries before we were able to gain our spiritual foothold. So yes, there is suffering, but this can be safely ignored, knowing that it is not a permanent condition by any means.

As you mentioned the Gods, you have nothing to fear. Meditate on their sigil and pull their energy directly into your heart chakra, and you will feel close and loved by them. Don't ignore this.

Lastly, if your negative feelings are strong or persistent enough, then you should do a working with optimistic and blissful energies, such as Sowilo or Wunjo, respectively, or Fehu, and so on. Your mental state is important and should not feel continually hurt. There is always a way to improve.

Thank you so much.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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