I like to be non-serious but I’ve said serious things here & here’s another one. Just because there are things that people don’t know that they should know - any gender but it’s about women.
Here are some real documented things that happen when you have a baby & through pregnancy that are less well known about.
There have been people here interested in epigenetics and changes that can intentionally impact DNA. I don’t see many documented cases of random extreme change to anyone’s DNA except for some mutations, epigenetic DNA is a different set of things.
When you become pregnant and through the process your DNA changes beyond just epigenetic changes. Your entire body changes the way it operates and sometimes doesn’t return, sometimes does. On top of that you also start sharing DNA (not to the point of being fully meshed but close) with the baby. The baby has its own full set of DNA which is also separate from yours pretty quickly. That DNA can be detected through tests.
The reason for it is “survival,” yet the changes can be very extreme. A woman changes entirely, not only is she aware of what’s going on but she’s literally turning into a different person. Real life metamorphosis or like something out of a sci-fi movie. It’s advanced and in depth, I noticed a while back some books in school changed off and on, certain information gets removed and I took time to memorize very specific things that I felt could be at risk. One of those things would also be issues related to vaccines & disorders.
A girl/woman’s brain changes in the way it functions, smell becomes different and senses are changed which isn’t just from hormones. It’s not just a few things that are different and no trans person could replicate the experience either as far as I know.
Your brain also physically changes, it’s documented that women’s brains grey matter changes which is less permanent.
What that’s called or referred to, when people notice it’s called “mom brain,” your brain is dedicated to something else for a long period of time. So, other things are easy to forget and sometimes important things. Things slow down, and it’s a lot different from just regular stress.
This does relate to the gods/goddesses as far as important issues go, motherhood was undeniably blurred throughout the dark ages. Currently, women and families are still facing issues. There are people who believe women are less than human or creatures due to mechanisms they can’t understand, relate to, and so mom’s are misunderstood. They are under-cared for in a lot of ways throughout important times. That’s changing though and depending on your environment it might not be a factor at all.
Even if I have been privileged, there are things that make you different when you become a mom compared to “the world,”
I’m far enough out now that my body has been reset, and my kids are getting to be old enough. I can feel how different things are. It’s like a switch reversing, and I feel “personhood,” again. Mom’s report a loss of identity, not feeling like anything more than a machine, and it can even be hard to put together a sentence that makes sense to anyone. So reaching out in other ways can be different. It’s easy to get discriminated against in groups or social settings when you desperately need it, to have others that are willing to plan with you or help, and separately judgement and excessive pressure to be “more,” when you’re already running at max capacity.
So if you have mom friends, reaching out more than once, waiting, remembering and then if you can - just being there and being someone competent enough to be around kids, best option along with not having too much judgement on your own ideas of how to parent. For the most part, children belong with their mom.
Right now for me, it’s a really weird feeling because I feel less needed, I have emotions that are actually coming back that I haven’t felt. I don’t remember feeling them, or expressing them. Not being able to express them because 1. Trying to be perfect 2. Processing changes, and even though you feel things I think this is actually happening.
I feel like I am thinking more, capable of thinking more, capable of putting my attention into something in a “normal,” way and it feels really good.
Imagine your actual brain shrinking or growing, you can function and learn and do certain things but something is “off,” and it’s like a switch being turned on. I feel free, I feel like I’m circling between all of these other anxieties that I had (mom anxiety) and they’re just dropping off. It’s like what happened is disappearing or something and maybe I’m even forgetting what happened.
I’ve forgotten things I’ve said, random conversations and so on that other people remember and even really important major life decisions, it’s different. A person should be really trustworthy to a woman that’s pregnant or a mom. The safest thing is overall that you’re kind of with your family, and my ex had a valid argument when he said I just should never leave the house.
Men go through some pretty major documentable physical changes too, not to the same degree but men have anxiety especially about their partner. A pitfall to try to work through is a clash between someone wanting their freedom versus another person in the relationship prioritizing their partners safety. Relationships and the dynamic becomes entirely different too, and it’s obviously way beyond a casual date.
Either way, those physical changes are really important. Personality can change entirely and it’s not a disorder.
When I had my second I had not slept for 3 nights straight. Sadly the only thing others might think can be “maybe it’s drugs” if they don’t know. Not sleeping is normal, but it has to happen eventually. By the third night I was genuinely worried that I wouldn’t sleep at all, and eventually I got just enough sleep (4-6 hours) and it can look like that off and on for months. Normal people need sleep every night and a routine.
If you don’t brush your teeth you do have to if you get pregnant or you will absolutely feel consequences of that. A lot of girls I know aren’t exactly responsible enough to maintain themselves and a baby but have also made good enough step-parents. I think those women are so admirable.
Anyway even my opinions are sort of changing or re-setting. I feel -capable- of forming other relationships or friendships and like I can actually play a bigger role in them. Sometimes women say having children is daunting and feels like a form of slavery, a lot of times the thought of birth is terrifying.
The sense of “me” can leave, and then there’s eventually a “me,” that comes back. You don’t know that you even have it until you lose it.