Goldenwings
Member
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2025
- Messages
- 247
This thread will serve too for you to know how a muslim lives
I watched porn since i was 11/12 years old, i had huge sexual urges since that age and also was programed that having a girlfriend is prohibited by islam, thus this energy went to porn, even if i was able to get a girlfriend easily ( i am not exagerating many girls asked me to be their boyfriend and i turned them down because "Allah" told me to) but it just was too much for me since i was afraid of hell in the afterlife. And at that time i was feeling immense guilt every single time i masturbate + the social pressure, people acted like no one masturbate so i felt im a bad guy
Lately i was considering stoping porn, i did quit with few relapses but one day i found a website thats just so good , since i developed a very refined taste in porn, to the point the videos that are trending or getting most likes dont excite me, the angles should be right, the models should meet certain standards, quality lighting etc , the website i found was having those kind of videos i like
So i became addicted again for long period of time, also i was visiting a website where i roleplayed with girls( i was visiting it since i was 15 years old which is crazy since i could easily get a gf but instead choose to rp online, because of islam)
Some weeks ago, i was eating then just out of curiosity or whatever i wanted to kind of pray to Satan even if i know it doesnt work like that , but i just wanted to do it, i said Satan can you please make my life better thank you. I felt a shiver.
The day after my favourite porn website was down and same thing for the roleplay website i always used , it felt bad actually lol since i knew there isnt a website as good as this one , i decided its time to quit all that, a day later i tried using another website i regreted it , it felt bad i just lost energy for nothing, then i completly lost interest in porn, and masturbation ( what i was addicted to is porn rather than masturbation so, they both went together)
Was it a coincidence or a real thing i dont know, i just wanted to share my experience, im literally no longer attracted to porn nor masturbation,it doesnt even cross my mind, i know emptiness calls something to fill it, i think i will just meet more girls without necessarly doing something everytime ( i dont wanna end up sex addict ), so that i dont go back to porn
I watched porn since i was 11/12 years old, i had huge sexual urges since that age and also was programed that having a girlfriend is prohibited by islam, thus this energy went to porn, even if i was able to get a girlfriend easily ( i am not exagerating many girls asked me to be their boyfriend and i turned them down because "Allah" told me to) but it just was too much for me since i was afraid of hell in the afterlife. And at that time i was feeling immense guilt every single time i masturbate + the social pressure, people acted like no one masturbate so i felt im a bad guy
Lately i was considering stoping porn, i did quit with few relapses but one day i found a website thats just so good , since i developed a very refined taste in porn, to the point the videos that are trending or getting most likes dont excite me, the angles should be right, the models should meet certain standards, quality lighting etc , the website i found was having those kind of videos i like
So i became addicted again for long period of time, also i was visiting a website where i roleplayed with girls( i was visiting it since i was 15 years old which is crazy since i could easily get a gf but instead choose to rp online, because of islam)
Some weeks ago, i was eating then just out of curiosity or whatever i wanted to kind of pray to Satan even if i know it doesnt work like that , but i just wanted to do it, i said Satan can you please make my life better thank you. I felt a shiver.
The day after my favourite porn website was down and same thing for the roleplay website i always used , it felt bad actually lol since i knew there isnt a website as good as this one , i decided its time to quit all that, a day later i tried using another website i regreted it , it felt bad i just lost energy for nothing, then i completly lost interest in porn, and masturbation ( what i was addicted to is porn rather than masturbation so, they both went together)
Was it a coincidence or a real thing i dont know, i just wanted to share my experience, im literally no longer attracted to porn nor masturbation,it doesnt even cross my mind, i know emptiness calls something to fill it, i think i will just meet more girls without necessarly doing something everytime ( i dont wanna end up sex addict ), so that i dont go back to porn
