I don't feel at home in this world

[6The6Return6]

I think I can understand your feeling, feel strange and that you have not belonged to this place since forever. But as we move forward in meditations, we will see things more clearly and thus get better answers to the reasons for things and how to get out of such situations.

I think it is the desire of many here to have been born on a better planet, but the fight against the enemy is already to make the earth this better place, which it has been to for thousands of years.

 

[DarkPagan666]

I know exactly how you feel. I have water as a dominant element too. I did a merqury square that helped a lot. Beside this I had to program my mind by acknowledging my emotions and my reactions to certain situations or behaviour from people as it really took a toll on me from day to day basis for certain periods (astrologically).

Hang in there, you are not alone, and you know what? You'll be fine. You have Satan and the Gods, you have us.

Whenever an emotion pops up in the head or just starting to swallow you. Ask yourself questions: why do I feel this emotion? What can I do to control this emotion and thought? Analyze it, focus on your reaction to it. Your body movements and fysiology.

Then, find yourself a safe time. A safe haven in your everyday where you deal with certain psyches. This can last 30 mins or an hour! Whatever suits you. Try to tell your mind you will deal with this emotion or issue later when you have the time and can think properly. Ask Satan and the Gods for guidance in how to mature and grow emotionally and to stay in control. Where you are able to heal and deal with your emotions in a constructive and healthy way. This help is gonna be quite subtle, so be sure to listen! Or just feel, in your case. You have immense power, we all do.

I know the hurt, the sorrow, the pain, the grief, the agony...these dreadfully destructive consuming feelings/emotions that this world put on our pure and sensitive souls. It leaves scars. But, the world isn't just grim. It is wonderful as well! I acknowledge the horror, yes. But I choose the good and brilliance this world may present to me, and under Satans guidance... Life is golden! I am really in a happy state, I am fulfilled, and I finally know exactly who I am. Which paths I were meant to take. This comes in time so have patience! My point is, this is a learning phase for you, and you will conquer, that is all!

Stay strong comrade!

 

[darkmonkey666]

Your ok to many of us it doesnt feel like home or a place we belong. Even some people who are not Zevism feel like this a lot. Mainly cause we have forgotten what it means to be human and even the basics of interacting with eachother in the modern age. It used to be people knew how to connect and talked to eachother and even with the enemy somewhat we had community things and a purpose for life. Now not so much anymore and sadly that may be partly due to the energies of age of Aquarius that the enemy is hijacking. BUT rest assured that will end we again will have everything we once did and more advance as a civilization be happy have a purpose etc. You will carry on and things will get better because of that. If you have to think of the future or a past life you remember (if this applies) where you are actually happy then do so sometimes. It will certainly make you feel better.

I guess i can't say you will really find someone or multiple people to hang out with or anything that you feel at home around. But your fine and can do it for now the way things are. You will eventually have a job to do and people to be around when we start to take over. That may be only a few years away. That is where you will feel at home. Keep it up realize things are changing fast someone around you or that you know now will wake up most likely in a year or two. You will be fine. Think of the future if your sad.

Till then dont worry and try your best.

And yeah i have a lot of water too so I understand it. I don't feel great in this world either or fully at home but I am making it at least somewhat work. But I am ok you will be too. Its not bad at all these are needed traits in the world as you see so we will have a purpose when we take over the world needs people that are empathetic to heal. So nothing wrong with you or anything this is normal.

Don't worry you will be fine.

 

[Fuchs]

I just want to mini rant for a bit, I've been a Zevist for quite time, but I never wrote anything here, because I didn't know what to post. However, Satan saved my life and reaching Zevism is absolutely the best thing that ever happened in my life.
But spiritual awakening requires pain. It's not a walk in the park, especially if you have a though past behind you. And you gain awareness and realize how disgusting this world is. It is a world of yehuborim and their horrible actions and I look around and I am surrounded by xtians.
I do Rituals everyday but I still feel like I don't belong here.
Maybe I'm too empathetic, I indeed have a lot of water in my birth chart and I don't know how should I control it.
I'm feeling too overwhelmed.

Do you do Returning Curses 1 & 2 after F-Ritual?
https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Returning_Curses.html
https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Returning_Curses2.html

You could work with Fire-Element to balance your water.
https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Invoking_Fire.html

Or invoke ether (ether does adapt/transform to the element you miss [did read one time on the forum]):
https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Invoking_Quintessence.html

 

[Username]

I feel some kind of connection to you.
The reason I was dedicated was because I was afraid of threats to my life or threat to my loved ones because of my spirtual advancement. I won't deny that before I dedicated, I felt a strange connection to Sir Satan, like, I felt like I had to dedicate and that it was the right thing to do, It just felt right and something that I had to do.

Here, most people dedicate because they are Sir Satan's own. The other members call him Father and feel extreme love to him whereas my only connection to him was to gain protection,knowledge and guidance for which I would do Final Ritual's daily and if need be the will to contribute with what I can but not the kind of connection that the other members feel, enough to call him their Father.

Don't get me wrong, I do feel warm when seeing his face in white robe on the website. Its just that I want to preseve my individuality no matter what happens. Even if it leads me to nowhere or at a dead end, I want to preserve my own 'self' and in the process of doing so I feel like my thoughts would offend him.
It is kind of like seeing all other Zevists under his shadown while I stare at the scene away from far smiling. Something like that.

However, no matter what kind of connection I feel towards him or to Zevism, I want to repay all what he has or might have done for me at my own pace and abilities no matter what. Come to think of it, I only say 'I want to' but never have done anything of the sorts. I only realised this while I was typing.

In any case, you are not alone when you that you don't feel like you belong here.
Instead of thinking that you feel like you don't belong here, how about you think "I want to belong here",
" I want to belong here like everyone else".

If you are feeling too overwhelmed, do void meditations. Empty your thoughts and just observe your emotions. Just observe your emotions while doing void meditations and nothing else. I feel like that might help solve your problems.

 

[Jack]

Part of being an adult is to learn to deal with life in a pragmatic way. It doesn't matter if you like or dislike the world. The world is not affected by your actions individually and thus straining yourself for that which you cant control is excruciating, I get it. This is why I think people should really learn to discern things.

You need to discern the ways that your actions relate to society as a whole and your personal life.

For example, the only thing you can do to influence society is to do the Rituals and perhaps political activism on the behalf of Right Wingers. There's nothing more you can do and you don't have perfect knowledge so you don't know what will happen in the near future. So straining your mind about societal conditions is totally useless.

However you can enrich your life by your personal actions. You can make a lot of money, and can immerse yourself in a skill that you develop which brings your life solace and meaning. You can get contentment in life even within the confines of a dystopian society if you focus on yourself and your development.

Moreover, you need to let go of the controlling nature and perfectionism. The world will never be perfect, and we will never have perfect politics, societal standards, relationships etc so stop trying and needing everything to be perfect and accept reality. Reality isn't subject to your personal desires, it is what it is. You need to learn to endure and find the meaningful things in life that give you personal happiness. That's the only thing you can do. Otherwise you'll end up depressed and angry at everyone and everything.