Goldenwings
New member
- Joined
- Nov 15, 2025
- Messages
- 4
Hi,
In my childhood i heard that there is a jhin ( ghost), she is female and has goat legs, i was frightned , i dont know if its psychological, but i was always feeling a presence and always feared being alone , and some few times maybe one or two
i kind of saw someone in front of me with goat legs , but i always was staring down when seing it so i always just saw the legs , time passed , i became very religious which made me never fear ghosts ( what i called them) , then came a time when i started living alone, after few years, sometimes when im making food i felt someone is present behind me i look back and see nothing , this happened to me tooooooo many times
to the point of it becoming normal, times come when i forget all about that but then comes a moment when im making food and i feel a presence behind me then i forget all about that then after months it happens again, this was weird, few years passed i stopped believing in religions, i started believing that there is one god , and its all the existence and we are all connected in a way and appear *not connected" in another, one time i was sleeping then when i woke up felt a buz in my head it was intense and i was this time 100% sure someone is standing in front of me
i have shivers now while im writing this, i was 100%sure someone is standing i thought at first someone entred my house to steal or something so i acted asleep then removed the blanket and sat quickly only to see nothing , another day ( maybe months or years between these two incidents i dont remember ) i was sleeping and when i woke up felt the same buzz in my head and was 100% sure someone is there , i jumped and woke up only to find nothing
add to that one time i was eating while feeling good ( i wasnt feelinfg fear or something) when i stood and turned right i saw someone standing ( my eyes were looking down i saw only the legs) i saw the goat or bull legs , for very very brief moment then it vanished ( im sure i saw it , i stayed shocked but with 0 fear this time i was just curious), also one day i was sleeping and when i woke up i szw my brother standing in front of me and he was smiling and i told him : oh man you scared me.
And he started vanishing a bit by bit , he started becoming invisible little by little until he disappeared , and i witnessed that , then i called my brother i think or i just heard him talking in another room so it wasnt my brother , add to that time passed , i forgot all that, i once found a north african music that the musicians claim to be given to them by god pan
at this period i was in deep sadness when i listened to the music in a repeated cycle i remembred i entred a bliss that lasted 1 week, i was feeling blissful all day 24/24 and even the colours of reality become better everyrhing seemed more beautiful and i was questioning myself if everything was always this beautiful or its the state im in. Later i started questioning a lot of things in my life and started to have controversial world view
i developed controversial opinions in literaly every subject, which made me feel society is against me , which made me feel like if i am the God pan, with horns and goat legs and everyone is scared of me and judge by appearance yet im a different person inside which made me love the pan music i talked about more ( its a flute a drum music).
Time passed , i once started litening to a music that is destined to a 'ghost' its a north african music destined to what they call the king of ghosts and the day he comes is thursday ( i think it may be zeus by the way).
I didnt believe that actually, but loved the music even if the lyrics was sometimes negative, i listened in cycles to the music , then i discovered thzt when i lay down and listen to it, i go to sleep and wake up minutes later ( i dont know how much time i think 30min or something like that) i wake up feeling very very good and light. What scared me is once when i woke up i felt someone standing near my bed , i have shivers now while writing this, i got scared to the point i didnt listen to it again until this week,
religions programed to fear the gods i dont know how to disactivate that , i feel that if i saw a god in front of me i will go crazy in the same time i am familiar with hindu gods like makali and find looking at her with the skulls normal , i even feel love looking at her seing her as symbol of transcendence , but when it comes to satanism, and i feel its real ( i am amazigh by the way ) i get in same time scared i dont know why, and many times when i think a lot about the gods i start feeling someone will appear or i feel an intense presence or feel shivers which make me become fearful.
I want to add one thing to all that ,once i read 3 books on ho oponopono, in very short period of time, and while doing it or while asking my self something , i dont remember what i did exactly , but i heared that i am protected by 72 angels ( i never knew there are 72 angels somewhere and i didnt know about satanism at that moment , i also felt someone was with me and left ( which i believed was a demon) keep in mind that in north african mysticism they sometimes call demons angels or saints to avoid problems with religious people, so now knowing satanism maybe the 72 is the demons and the one who left is the angel i dont know actually) very confusing.
Can you based on all that give me some tips ? Is a God being present with me or is it my guardian deamon or what exactly ? How to deal with the fear that a God may appear at anytime especially following the feeling of presence? Im new to satanism im very confused, please guide me.
Thank you in advance
In my childhood i heard that there is a jhin ( ghost), she is female and has goat legs, i was frightned , i dont know if its psychological, but i was always feeling a presence and always feared being alone , and some few times maybe one or two
i kind of saw someone in front of me with goat legs , but i always was staring down when seing it so i always just saw the legs , time passed , i became very religious which made me never fear ghosts ( what i called them) , then came a time when i started living alone, after few years, sometimes when im making food i felt someone is present behind me i look back and see nothing , this happened to me tooooooo many times
to the point of it becoming normal, times come when i forget all about that but then comes a moment when im making food and i feel a presence behind me then i forget all about that then after months it happens again, this was weird, few years passed i stopped believing in religions, i started believing that there is one god , and its all the existence and we are all connected in a way and appear *not connected" in another, one time i was sleeping then when i woke up felt a buz in my head it was intense and i was this time 100% sure someone is standing in front of me
i have shivers now while im writing this, i was 100%sure someone is standing i thought at first someone entred my house to steal or something so i acted asleep then removed the blanket and sat quickly only to see nothing , another day ( maybe months or years between these two incidents i dont remember ) i was sleeping and when i woke up felt the same buzz in my head and was 100% sure someone is there , i jumped and woke up only to find nothing
add to that one time i was eating while feeling good ( i wasnt feelinfg fear or something) when i stood and turned right i saw someone standing ( my eyes were looking down i saw only the legs) i saw the goat or bull legs , for very very brief moment then it vanished ( im sure i saw it , i stayed shocked but with 0 fear this time i was just curious), also one day i was sleeping and when i woke up i szw my brother standing in front of me and he was smiling and i told him : oh man you scared me.
And he started vanishing a bit by bit , he started becoming invisible little by little until he disappeared , and i witnessed that , then i called my brother i think or i just heard him talking in another room so it wasnt my brother , add to that time passed , i forgot all that, i once found a north african music that the musicians claim to be given to them by god pan
at this period i was in deep sadness when i listened to the music in a repeated cycle i remembred i entred a bliss that lasted 1 week, i was feeling blissful all day 24/24 and even the colours of reality become better everyrhing seemed more beautiful and i was questioning myself if everything was always this beautiful or its the state im in. Later i started questioning a lot of things in my life and started to have controversial world view
i developed controversial opinions in literaly every subject, which made me feel society is against me , which made me feel like if i am the God pan, with horns and goat legs and everyone is scared of me and judge by appearance yet im a different person inside which made me love the pan music i talked about more ( its a flute a drum music).
Time passed , i once started litening to a music that is destined to a 'ghost' its a north african music destined to what they call the king of ghosts and the day he comes is thursday ( i think it may be zeus by the way).
I didnt believe that actually, but loved the music even if the lyrics was sometimes negative, i listened in cycles to the music , then i discovered thzt when i lay down and listen to it, i go to sleep and wake up minutes later ( i dont know how much time i think 30min or something like that) i wake up feeling very very good and light. What scared me is once when i woke up i felt someone standing near my bed , i have shivers now while writing this, i got scared to the point i didnt listen to it again until this week,
religions programed to fear the gods i dont know how to disactivate that , i feel that if i saw a god in front of me i will go crazy in the same time i am familiar with hindu gods like makali and find looking at her with the skulls normal , i even feel love looking at her seing her as symbol of transcendence , but when it comes to satanism, and i feel its real ( i am amazigh by the way ) i get in same time scared i dont know why, and many times when i think a lot about the gods i start feeling someone will appear or i feel an intense presence or feel shivers which make me become fearful.
I want to add one thing to all that ,once i read 3 books on ho oponopono, in very short period of time, and while doing it or while asking my self something , i dont remember what i did exactly , but i heared that i am protected by 72 angels ( i never knew there are 72 angels somewhere and i didnt know about satanism at that moment , i also felt someone was with me and left ( which i believed was a demon) keep in mind that in north african mysticism they sometimes call demons angels or saints to avoid problems with religious people, so now knowing satanism maybe the 72 is the demons and the one who left is the angel i dont know actually) very confusing.
Can you based on all that give me some tips ? Is a God being present with me or is it my guardian deamon or what exactly ? How to deal with the fear that a God may appear at anytime especially following the feeling of presence? Im new to satanism im very confused, please guide me.
Thank you in advance
