Other #75605 i am not very smart

It's fine :) I look back at my earlier posts and journals, and I see how far I've come.

Just keep going at the pace that is right for you, check in with your GD every so often to see what you should be working towards, and enjoy the journey.

A wise Zevism once said, "the more I know the more I realize my ignorance".

i feel like an outcast on these forums where everyone seems to either be completely new or seriously advanced and well educated and i am seemingly doing nothing well enough. the more i read and learn about things, the less i feel i know, as the field of potential knowledge within my reach is exponentially expanding. im slowly realising this is a much slower and longer path than i perceived it as.
dont get me wrong, i do not mind working on myself for the next however many decades i have, i simply feel like it will take me years to even cover all the basics.

You're in the right place. Just take it a day at a time and learn what you can from osmosis. Exercise your own sense of reason. It could take a couple of years before you get settled in, just read as much as you can and let your intrigue lead you through.

i feel like an outcast on these forums where everyone seems to either be completely new or seriously advanced and well educated and i am seemingly doing nothing well enough. the more i read and learn about things, the less i feel i know, as the field of potential knowledge within my reach is exponentially expanding. im slowly realising this is a much slower and longer path than i perceived it as.
dont get me wrong, i do not mind working on myself for the next however many decades i have, i simply feel like it will take me years to even cover all the basics.

Well, "standard" education from xian/islamic or common people in general is often based on "I am not enough" to push people to do more. This is drummed into the mind since childhood, like at school, where you are always confronted with better people with better results, to push you do more. This does not consider your characteristic and abilities, you may be a genius in math and poor in writing, for your own features, and you will be asked to improve your writing otherwise you will not be "like others" or so.
This can create a suffering mindset, that is, when you find a new challenge you automatically put yourself in the "I am not enough smart" mode, so that you will run faster to reach and maybe double others. That is not needed as more advanced people are not trying to distance you; on the contrary they may be of help to you.
I know this for a fact on myself, it is hard to overcome this mindset. That may be a strong motivation, but of the wrong nature. Feeling this way can put you down as you perceive the path as a burden, not as an UNIQUE an GOLDEN opportunity you have.

What I want to say is, try to be the best of yourself! Don't compare yourself to others.

People who are rapidly advancing probably had to suffer a lot more to get where they are or they are recovering skills from a past life. A lot of the people who you think are advancing faster and doing so out of desperation drawing out spiritual power to overcome adversity. You also don't know how many years before JOS they spent studying or how many lifetimes. Even if its takes 20 years to get decently advance that is more progress than most of humanity could make 300 years ago due to lack of access to information. For the record even if you do the magus opas there are still more levels to advance. Its never going to end. I would bet everything Satan is still working himself after all these eons to advance to whatever the level is.

I think its a mistake to measure yourself against others. It okay to use the achievements of others as a reference and to learn them. The real question is where were you a year ago vs now? or 5 years ago vs now? As long as you are making continuous progress then that is a big win. There is a general rule the first 80% of effort will yield 20% of the result. For awhile it could look like nothing is happening then all of a sudden everything clicks and there is rapid progression.

i feel like an outcast on these forums where everyone seems to either be completely new or seriously advanced and well educated and i am seemingly doing nothing well enough. the more i read and learn about things, the less i feel i know, as the field of potential knowledge within my reach is exponentially expanding. im slowly realising this is a much slower and longer path than i perceived it as.
dont get me wrong, i do not mind working on myself for the next however many decades i have, i simply feel like it will take me years to even cover all the basics.

I felt this way not even long ago. I didn't even know 'where' I was.

Just focus on the meditations every day, don't be hostile to assuming responsibilities and it will come to you.

i feel like an outcast on these forums where everyone seems to either be completely new or seriously advanced and well educated and i am seemingly doing nothing well enough. the more i read and learn about things, the less i feel i know, as the field of potential knowledge within my reach is exponentially expanding. im slowly realising this is a much slower and longer path than i perceived it as.
dont get me wrong, i do not mind working on myself for the next however many decades i have, i simply feel like it will take me years to even cover all the basics.

To strengthen your mind, I recommend that you make a Mercury Square with appropriate affirmations to strengthen your mind and expand (develop) your intellectual abilities.

I also recommend that you make a Square of the Sun, because you feel very insecure about yourself.

i feel like an outcast on these forums where everyone.

Just read templeofzeus.org.
It's quick, it takes no time at all.

After reading the main site you read the sermons you can read.

And then you can study ancient tradition for yourself.

Don't confuse education, and experience with intelligence. I am sure you are more intelligent than what you are aware.