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Reading through posts helps me feel like I'm connected to others like me. I physically don't know any Satanists, that I'm aware of. Hoping this message doesn't come off whiney....I dedicated in April 2013, since EVERYTHING has changed. It's hard to look back and even imagine my life before. So much wasted time, (I'm about to turn 48). Now, everywhere I look I see lies. Everyone, everything. Is this supposed to be this overwhelming? It never stops, the constant feeling of singularity. There is no one I can talk too. I've opened up a tiny bit to a girl I know and it changed our friendship so won't be doing that again. The stupid religions have bible camp, trips they go on fucking churches on every damned corner, I live in Texas, bible belt, why can't we have something like this where we can come together and learn and teach each other. Of course I know the answer to that, just saying how I feel. I'm so lonely, I feel isolated. Advancements in abilities take time and I am continually experiencing the benefits which I am very grateful to Father and my Guardian for. I'm 100% positive that many of us experience or have experienced this. Can anyone out there reach out and share a solution that has had a positive outcome? The enemy is everywhere. I have recently been enlightened to an experience I had when I first dedictated in regards to an enemy that has been following me causing pain and suffering for my lifetime. I believe it to be a grey. When I first saw it, it portrayed itself as a bad demon, not of Satan. It even identified itself as such, what a liar. It always tries to confuse and distract me constantly. Anyways if anyone made it through this mini novel, Id love feed back. Oh, seems like everyone has a cool screen name, I been thinking on one for several years now and ain't come up with one yet. Is there some formula for inventing an alias that represents whom you are? Thanks all.
Hail Enki
Hail Malphas