Satan's tests

[Way_Seeker6661]

Long story short, a few days ago my girlfriend left me. At first I was in a sort of emotional shock, I was just like "ok, it's happened" and that was that for the rest of the day. That night, as the hurt started creeping in, I decide that since it was now me and only me(I have no one else in this town and that's how I want it) and I'd be living alone I would give EVERYTHING to my path with Satan and the Gods. Next morning I began and had new and amazing experiences in my Meditations. That day was horribly painful but a strength and focus arised that I have never felt before. I was SOLID. I didn't stop moving all day because if I did the emotions would swell up too much. Next day was similiar, except I was becoming used to it and the pain was far worse and where the previous day I was absolutely determined to block her out this day I wanted her back, intensely. Well she came back. This was yesterday and already my focus has dropped, my energy too, I'm not IN myself like I was. Now, I've realized, looking back, at that moment she asked me to take her back it was a test of my devotion to Satan. My inner self said no, but I said yes. Now I feel I've dissapointed Satan, and passed up the opportunity to achieve my truest desires. You'll answer me with "break up with her" but I know myself and I won't be back in the same space that way. My question is this: Does Satan allow us second chances with such tests?

 

[High Priestess Lydia Coventina]

To err is human. I think you're still in the test, it's what you ultimately decide that will be your "final answer". Ask yourself: Are you choosing her forever? Or will you permanently end the relationship soon?

Hail Father Satan!

--- In , "Way_Seeker666" <way_seeker666@... wrote:

Long story short, a few days ago my girlfriend left me. At first I was in a sort of emotional shock, I was just like "ok, it's happened" and that was that for the rest of the day. That night, as the hurt started creeping in, I decide that since it was now me and only me(I have no one else in this town and that's how I want it) and I'd be living alone I would give EVERYTHING to my path with Satan and the Gods. Next morning I began and had new and amazing experiences in my Meditations. That day was horribly painful but a strength and focus arised that I have never felt before. I was SOLID. I didn't stop moving all day because if I did the emotions would swell up too much. Next day was similiar, except I was becoming used to it and the pain was far worse and where the previous day I was absolutely determined to block her out this day I wanted her back, intensely. Well she came back. This was yesterday and already my focus has dropped, my energy too, I'm not IN myself like I was. Now, I've realized, looking back, at that moment she asked me to take her back it was a test of my devotion to Satan. My inner self said no, but I said yes. Now I feel I've dissapointed Satan, and passed up the opportunity to achieve my truest desires. You'll answer me with "break up with her" but I know myself and I won't be back in the same space that way. My question is this: Does Satan allow us second chances with such tests?

 

[Way_Seeker6661]

It's an easy choice, but a hard decision. The thing is, like I said, it's about the state of being it put me in and if I were to end it now I wouldn't go into that again. Then again if I make this choice for Satan, anything is possible. Lydia you're always somehow a help no matter what you say. Thank you Sister

 

[High Priestess Lydia Coventina]

Thanks, I'm always glad to help my brethren

--- In , "Way_Seeker666" <way_seeker666@... wrote:

It's an easy choice, but a hard decision. The thing is, like I said, it's about the state of being it put me in and if I were to end it now I wouldn't go into that again. Then again if I make this choice for Satan, anything is possible. Lydia you're always somehow a help no matter what you say. Thank you Sister

 

[Way_Seeker6661]

Wow. What a reply. "After each choice something awaits you. After
the right choice...Satan awaits you." This really struck me. Yes she is an outsider. And yes she knows about my being a Satanist. When she came back she said she wants to start learning, but she has said that before and I doubt her resolve to actually get on with it. I've realized living with someone is bad for me, but it's worse because her energy is lower than mine and she's draining, which completely fucks with my Meditations because all the energy I raise I lose. It's a frightening thought, giving everything to Satan, even though it's what I want more than anything, because I've been fucked over every time I commit to someone. I KNOW Satan will NEVER let me down though. He just doesn't do that. Tonight I was walking to a shop, just after some other shit happened which could have disastrous repercussions, and I was talking to Satan, asking if He could please help me with it. I said I would do this - go alone and give my life ENTIRELY to Him, the Gods, and Myself - and He immediately said "Well then you have NOTHING to worry about". So I have a lot to organize and somehow make happen with tremendous odds against me but I've made my decision.
Thank you for your words Brother!

Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

 

[Brian Gibbons]

<td val[/IMG]I too have learned to trust Father with my love life,and it turned out better then I could have ever imagined.I just decided that I could not ever have anyone that is not an Zevism completely.To me there just isn't anything to build a intimate relationship on,plus how cool is it to do rituals to Enki with your spouse.

Hail Enki
Brian 

--- On Sat, 4/21/12, Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@... wrote:

From: Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@...
Subject: Re: Satan's tests
To:

  Wow. What a reply. "After each choice something awaits you. After
the right choice...Satan awaits you." This really struck me. Yes she is an outsider. And yes she knows about my being a Satanist. When she came back she said she wants to start learning, but she has said that before and I doubt her resolve to actually get on with it. I've realized living with someone is bad for me, but it's worse because her energy is lower than mine and she's draining, which completely fucks with my Meditations because all the energy I raise I lose. It's a frightening thought, giving everything to Satan, even though it's what I want more than anything, because I've been fucked over every time I commit to someone. I KNOW Satan will NEVER let me down though. He just doesn't do that. Tonight I was walking to a shop, just after some other shit happened which could have disastrous repercussions, and I was talking to Satan, asking if He could please help me with it. I said I would do this - go alone and give my life ENTIRELY to Him, the Gods, and Myself - and He immediately said "Well then you have NOTHING to worry about". So I have a lot to organize and somehow make happen with tremendous odds against me but I've made my decision.
Thank you for your words Brother!

Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

[/TD]

 

[Way_Seeker6661]

Lydia, I didn't mean that what you said wasn't helpful itself. It was. Just out of gratitude I wanted to say that. There are certain people in this group I've always felt either a strong connection to or a feeling of sensing them in some strange way. You're always encouraging in this way and I look up to you.

 

[High Priestess Lydia Coventina]

Aww thanks Way_seeker that means a lot to me

--- In , "Way_Seeker666" <way_seeker666@... wrote:

Lydia, I didn't mean that what you said wasn't helpful itself. It was. Just out of gratitude I wanted to say that. There are certain people in this group I've always felt either a strong connection to or a feeling of sensing them in some strange way. You're always encouraging in this way and I look up to you.

 

[Way_Seeker6661]

You are so right about all this. You've reminded me of one of Satan's warnings to me, that I didn't listen to. No prize for guessing where it's gotten me...
I'm pissed off about the fact that I have to wait to dump her, because of us living together and other things. Or maybe I'm not seeing clearly. But I KNOW good things are coming, as long as I stick to my word and I WILL. I want to do it now. I want to stand up and voice my choice of Satan over all others. I want to get to working on my Spiritual Goals and Fighting for Him and my Desires. I'm hoping to gain some clarity on this after tonight's Ritual. This has to end so my True Path can start.
Thank you so much Brother, and Brian, and Lydia. You guys are awesome!

Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

 

[maxi E intizza]

Father is not testing you. YOU are testing yourself. your devotion to father is something between YOU and FATHER. having a girlfriend or not makes no difference in the matter.your devotion to father should be 100% at all times, in or out a relationship. Father should always come first and last in your life. Ave Satanas

--- In , "Way_Seeker666" <way_seeker666@... wrote:

Long story short, a few days ago my girlfriend left me. At first I was in a sort of emotional shock, I was just like "ok, it's happened" and that was that for the rest of the day. That night, as the hurt started creeping in, I decide that since it was now me and only me(I have no one else in this town and that's how I want it) and I'd be living alone I would give EVERYTHING to my path with Satan and the Gods. Next morning I began and had new and amazing experiences in my Meditations. That day was horribly painful but a strength and focus arised that I have never felt before. I was SOLID. I didn't stop moving all day because if I did the emotions would swell up too much. Next day was similiar, except I was becoming used to it and the pain was far worse and where the previous day I was absolutely determined to block her out this day I wanted her back, intensely. Well she came back. This was yesterday and already my focus has dropped, my energy too, I'm not IN myself like I was. Now, I've realized, looking back, at that moment she asked me to take her back it was a test of my devotion to Satan. My inner self said no, but I said yes. Now I feel I've dissapointed Satan, and passed up the opportunity to achieve my truest desires. You'll answer me with "break up with her" but I know myself and I won't be back in the same space that way. My question is this: Does Satan allow us second chances with such tests?

 

[Brian Gibbons]

<td val[/IMG]Sometimes my friend we have to make some hard choices,but Father always makes things better then we can imagine.

Hail Enki
Brian 

--- On Mon, 4/23/12, Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@... wrote:

From: Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@...
Subject: Re: Satan's tests
To:

  You are so right about all this. You've reminded me of one of Satan's warnings to me, that I didn't listen to. No prize for guessing where it's gotten me...
I'm pissed off about the fact that I have to wait to dump her, because of us living together and other things. Or maybe I'm not seeing clearly. But I KNOW good things are coming, as long as I stick to my word and I WILL. I want to do it now. I want to stand up and voice my choice of Satan over all others. I want to get to working on my Spiritual Goals and Fighting for Him and my Desires. I'm hoping to gain some clarity on this after tonight's Ritual. This has to end so my True Path can start.
Thank you so much Brother, and Brian, and Lydia. You guys are awesome!

Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

[/TD]

 

[Way_Seeker6661]

I don't expect Him to make things better this time, although I do need some help, I just want to do what I need to.
Thanks Brian. You too are always an encouragement, and I'm grateful for you.


Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

 

[Brian Gibbons]

<td val[/IMG]Thanks brother,but that is what we are all here for,and why our great High Priestess started this group.We all draw from the experiences of each other,and I depend on you and many of the older members here,as well as our dedicated clergy.

Hail Enki
Brian 

--- On Wed, 4/25/12, Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@... wrote:

From: Way_Seeker666 <way_seeker666@...
Subject: Re: Satan's tests
To:

  I don't expect Him to make things better this time, although I do need some help, I just want to do what I need to.
Thanks Brian. You too are always an encouragement, and I'm grateful for you.

Hail To Our Father!!!
Hail Lord Maat!!!
Hail To All The Mighty Gods and Goddesses of Hell!!!

[/TD]