Greetings! I don't know much about astrology, I'm looking to study it, but I noticed something about myself and I'm relating it. I realized that most of the time I have a spike of energy, but it soon drains away. When I start something, withdrawal is always knocking at the door, as if I have no energy, even though I want it badly. I lose concentration very easily, I feel I have little tact for goals, even for meditation. I'm always afraid of how to start, execute and finish, long before I actually start something. I looked at my birth chart and saw a huge emphasis on water, with a deficiency in earth and fire. I feel that in fire this is even greater. Ironically, my favorite element has always been fire, perhaps because I felt I needed it somehow.
I have read that water lacks mostly focus, correct me if I am wrong. Focus, strength and will are the things I need most, even to walk the Satanic path the right way. Is there anything I can do to improve this? Any specific work? I'm just starting out, so I don't have much notion of spells, squares, etc. I'm still learning. I'd like to understand how this works. Thank you, brothers and sisters!