Relationships #80879 What am I doing wrong?

[Ask Satya Operator]

Saturn has screwed me over in regards to sex and finding a relationship.

It’s like I’m an automatic turn off for women. I can talk to them, have conversations with them. They don’t hate me or are afraid of me and I make sure I keep chats with them lighthearted and fun.

My hygeine is alright, I always shower before going out.

I don’t buy into the whole red-pill nonsense and treat women like human beings.

My looks are alright, I’m not a model but average looking. But it’s really starting to anger me.

I see broke guys get women.
I see boring guys get women.
I see way fatter guys than me get women (I’m a bit overweight not like obese)
I see shorter guys than me get women
I see guys with shitty personalites get women

And pretty ones too.

I don’t get it. It’s like all women have unconsciously agreed to not be attracted to me for a reason I can’t understand. I know I’m not entitled to it, but I just don’t understand what I’m doing wrong.

I’m not toxic. I just don’t get why no one likes me.

Whatever advice I’m given, I see guys break all these supposed “game rules” and get chicks anyway. I then try to replicate what they do and of course it doesn’t work me. I try to be myself and be genuine and that doesn’t work either. Being real doesn’t work. Being fake doesn’t work. I feel like the universe is ragebaiting/trolling me at this point.

It makes me feel like something is wrong with me and I don’t understand what it is.

 

[Eudora]

Saturn has screwed me over in regards to sex and finding a relationship.

It’s like I’m an automatic turn off for women. I can talk to them, have conversations with them. They don’t hate me or are afraid of me and I make sure I keep chats with them lighthearted and fun.

My hygeine is alright, I always shower before going out.

I don’t buy into the whole red-pill nonsense and treat women like human beings.

My looks are alright, I’m not a model but average looking. But it’s really starting to anger me.

I see broke guys get women.
I see boring guys get women.
I see way fatter guys than me get women (I’m a bit overweight not like obese)
I see shorter guys than me get women
I see guys with shitty personalites get women

And pretty ones too.

I don’t get it. It’s like all women have unconsciously agreed to not be attracted to me for a reason I can’t understand. I know I’m not entitled to it, but I just don’t understand what I’m doing wrong.

I’m not toxic. I just don’t get why no one likes me.

Whatever advice I’m given, I see guys break all these supposed “game rules” and get chicks anyway. I then try to replicate what they do and of course it doesn’t work me. I try to be myself and be genuine and that doesn’t work either. Being real doesn’t work. Being fake doesn’t work. I feel like the universe is ragebaiting/trolling me at this point.

It makes me feel like something is wrong with me and I don’t understand what it is.

There's nothing wrong with you. You just seem to be stuck in a cycle of hyper-awareness. You're so focused on the rules, your hygiene, not being like the "red pill" type, and being a good person, that perhaps you've neglected your own spontaneous spark.

Sometimes, for Saturn to raise its hand, you have to stop trying to "solve the problem" and start inhabiting the space simply by being, without expecting the other person to be the solution to that frustration.

You say the conversations are lighthearted and fun, and that they don't hate or fear you. That's excellent for building friendships, but sometimes being "too confident" or overly polite eliminates the tension necessary for desire to arise.

Many of those types you mention (the boring ones, the difficult ones, or the rule-breakers) sometimes project a rawer or less filtered energy.

If you're overly concerned with "not being toxic" or "doing the right thing," you might be unintentionally neutralizing your own masculine presence or personal magnetism.

Trying to replicate what others do is a recipe for failure because attraction is subconscious and detects incongruity. When you try to be "fake" or even "genuine" as a strategy to achieve a result, the other person senses an ulterior motive. That subtle hint of "neediness" or waiting for validation is often what flips the off switch in others.

When you feel like the universe is attacking you, you start operating from a place of lack. The mind begins searching for evidence of why others have it and you don't (confirmation bias). This creates a vibration of resentment or "why me?" that, even if you try to mask it with cheerful chatter, seeps into your body language and gaze.

Instead of watching what others do, you could try changing the frequency of your interactions. Sometimes we try to be funny to please others. Try being more observant, talking less, and holding eye contact more. It's not about being a jerk, but about allowing yourself to be a little more provocative or expressing your desires clearly but respectfully. Attraction rarely survives in the comfort zone.

Saturn teaches that the more you push something that's restricted, the stronger the resistance. If you stop seeking validation from the relationship that "you're not broken," that internal pressure disappears.

Sometimes it's not all about magic or anything like that; sometimes it's about taking action, forging what we want through action. Dedicate yourself to cultivating the things you truly desire, the things that ignite your inner light.

 

[Khem Nefermed]

They get chicks because they don't care so much about all of these things.

You showcase yourself, she showcases herself, you see if you like her, she sees if she likes you, you go from there.

The first part is very important. You seem to be obsessing over "proving you deserve the girl".

No. Especially not as a Zevist.
She must prove she deserves you. Go in with this mentality.
Don't overcorrect and be falsely arrogant, though. Women can smell false arrogance a mile away.

 

[Asra]

You mentioned you keep chats lighthearted. I don't know your exact definition of that, but if it's mostly small talk and movie recommendations, it means you're never engaging deeper (intellectually or emotionally) with any of the women you're talking to, so it's natural for them to think of you as an acquaintance rather than a romantic partner. Don't expect them to read your mind. Establish things from the beginning by inviting them on dates, not "out for a hang-out". Make it clear that the expectation is romantic.

Dating is also not only about what not to do/be like (unhygienic, disrespectful, obese, all the negative traits you listed), but also what to do/be like. If your interactions with women consist of a few friendly conversations and all you have to offer is your height and being well-kempt, you'll be regarded as not bad, but neither anything necessarily enticing. At most, this opens doors to possible future relationships, meaning it makes girls think you're not the type of guy they would avoid, but it doesn't make them attracted by default.

I assume the partner you want is someone intelligent, emotionally secure, with a stable living. These types don't go after shitty personalities or guys who watch red pill. The girls who do, beautiful or not, are not of the caliber you should be aiming for. Easily manipulated at best, idiots at worst. Red pill influencers also pay women to be on set with them (if they weren't trafficked there to begin with), so don't buy into their harem act.

 

[Yurei]

I see broke guys get women.
I see boring guys get women.
I see way fatter guys than me get women (I’m a bit overweight not like obese)
I see shorter guys than me get women
I see guys with shitty personalites get women

These men are most likely either betabuxxing or jestermaxxing. Their relationships may be one sided or purely transactional. Chances are she doesn't actually love these types; she could just be settling.

My advice would be to increase your exposure, have more meaningful conversations than just small talk, and if you are below average looking, work towards improving your looks if possible.