Curiosity of an ex Christian

The answer to 1, 2 and 4 is you have most likely been a Zevist (in one or more of its ancient forms) in your past lives like many of us have.

But some clarification for your third question:

Rising Babylon wrote:

3. I'm curious to why I've always felt Satan speaks to me as a female figure even though many depictions of him has been as an androgynous being.

You've probably felt Lilith or another Goddess on Satan's side that you mistook for Satan.

Satan has never been depicted as androgynous. Satan always was and is male. Obviously he doesn't have a goat head, either. He looks like a blond-haired blue-eyed tanned-skin human, but much more beautiful in an otherwordly beauty.

You're mistaking the Baphomet for a depiction of Satan, as many people do. It's not, and it was never meant to be a representation of Satan. It's an allegorical representation of a spiritually perfected being, one who has awakened his/her kundalini and reached the Magnum Opus.

From :

The image of Baphomet of western occultism was taken from the image of Shiva [above]. Note the position of the arms, one pointing upwards and the other downwards. The Baphomet again is symbolic of both the male and the female aspects of the soul. Note the Baphomet is both male and female, as also seen with in images of the Egyptian God Akhenaton. The horns are symbolic of Mercury, which is the vril, chi, witchpower, lifeforce, prana.

The wings of the soul represent spiritual freedom. The goat symbolizes fertility- fertility in multiplying the life force, vril, which activates and raises the serpent. The "Goat of a Thousand Young" is referring to the crown chakra, "Sahasrara" in Sanskrit which means "Thousand Petaled Lotus."

The horns are symbolic of the life force, the witchpower, vril, chi...This is symbolized by the symbol for the planet Mercury [shown directly below]. "Mercury" is known as "Messenger of the Gods." "God/s" is a code-word for the chakras. Note the horns shown on the image of Azazel [shown at left], with the rays shining fromm his head, representing the risen serpent.

Greetings, it's because you are a dedicated Zevist from past life.

For your third question, Satan is male, and I'm not sure what you mean exactly by speaks to you as a female figure. Did you heard him in a female voice trough telepatic communication? Or you just look at him as a mother? Because he is not. Astarte, and Lilith are.

Rising Babylon wrote:

Hello this is my first time posting on this site, so I'll try to keep it short and sweet.

There are things that I've noticed about detoxing from Christianity, and trying to find spiritual beliefs in Zevism , and other beliefs on my Journey on finding truth from a spiritual perspective.

1. Why have I always felt a connection to Satan even from the years of my childhood being indoctrinated with Christianity, I would pray secretly to him, while having many experiences with the spiritual world as a young child such as astral projection and sensing things very acutely.

2. What is the feeling of fire or warmth that I've gotten from satanic chants, music, and also a similar feeling experiencing with hertz, frequency music and kundalini mantras.

3. I'm curious to why I've always felt Satan speaks to me as a female figure even though many depictions of him has been as an androgynous being.

4. What is it about my search in zevism that is drawing me in ?

Thanks

Your soul knows it belongs with our Father Zeus and in our family. The warmth and fire is spiritual energy and internal elevation of your vibrations. You have felt a femminine nurturing presence because you need to understand that Zevism is welcoming and is receptive of your curiosity, probably due to also other psychological needs and views. Your Guardian Daemon might be guiding you directly here.

I appreciate the insight, you are confirming things I've known to be true a long time but held myself back.