Question #3467: My eyes have been opened, and I now believe what I never contemplated in the first place. It is real! Pl

[AskSatanOperator]

I just knew in my heart that that levey stuff has to be something else as I eyes opened to this reality that we all share. We live in it so differently than those enslaved by the giganticness of it all. The depth of my suffering was directly related to the information kept from us all in "the world". I feel like I was kept from the real "power?" that considers us all. I'm out on the road now (road of discovery), and walking alone - which is okay, because I'm alone for a reason now. My mind has escaped the captivity of colonialist thinking passed down and expanded through the endless generations. Mom's dad was born on the Cherokee rez, and the largest chunk of my mixed blood is that. I was NEVER their word "gay", but in my native heritage, I am 2-spirit, which is a special (not broken) person. We're supposed to be known for our abilities to go spiritual and stuff. Notice how I don't have much down pat in my descriptive wording. I don't know much. I know what my experiences are. I know what the world around me is, and what they value. I believe, now, that I know that this "power?" really is. I know I tried but never was reached by their "power?".
I'm not salty, not one bit. I feel a little stripped down though, because I could have known a cool relationship with what cares about us. Now, here come the meat... I'm so programmed to be fearful, resistant, and I'm really embarrassed to be both empathic, and that. I can let go, and dance another spirits dance... I've done it. They "would" tell me it's evil, and you all know that. Sure we do. However, before this maturity, just before over the course of the 3.5 yrs of my NDE's, I've learned that the truth they have pushes an agenda, so, who the f**k are they to believe? They even taught my that my natural abilities are yucky, my desire for love is, and that I was born unworthy. I think we both know different now, so, I've come to find a light if not a guide, which in this world, is too much to ask anyone these days.
Even without a false truth, I feel void of something still illusive to me. All of my life these (your) truths have been building up in me experience after experience, only to be torn back by more desire to look and live "normal", and avoid rejection. Well, that time is past, and f**k them! Now, look, when it comes to the truth, I don't know one cat from another, just what I feel, what I know (before I talk about it), and want I seek. Some brain damage from my NDE's hampers my reading some, some, but I can get down and chew some thick ole' thoughts down with the rest of em! I need yours. I know that "power?" is real, and calling. I'm sure your words will be guiding for me, and I ask for them as you feel moved. Thanks.