fucked up, but my heart still beats for you

[nebu]

what are the likely spiritual roots of having strong feelings of “love” still dormant from people from the past?

moon, venus, certain house, hypersensitivity, lack of balance in elements?

 

[NakedPluto [JG]]

Being human and young, most people experience most of these things.

 

[nebu]

Being human and young, most people experience most of these things.

i understand my friend nakedpluto, i think there was a lack of drama on my side in the topic.

it's like, a lifetime of fluctuations in liking someone, even with the bad things they have caused me, having a reunion the desire manifests itself again, like if i hadn't gotten over it.

for example, i had a crush in 2015 on a girl who was secret, and due to a lack of attitude i never pursued it and the attraction died as far as i thought in 2016, in 2019 it was a time where i saw her a lot and it came back as before, and i noticed which is a pattern with me.

isn't there such a thing as naturally erasing what you feel for someone over time? simply following things.

nothing expressed in the astrological area indirectly saying that you are prone to being someone who ignores the bad in others and focuses on the good moments…?
in a toxic way, i remember the 7th house in pluto and 7th in mars, like this.

something on the 'humiliation' level happened recently with a girl and what i feel for her now hasn't changed much, it's still intense and strong, unshakable.
but, my dignity exists.

 

[NakedPluto [JG]]

Being human and young, most people experience most of these things.

i understand my friend nakedpluto, i think there was a lack of drama on my side in the topic.

it's like, a lifetime of fluctuations in liking someone, even with the bad things they have caused me, having a reunion the desire manifests itself again, like if i hadn't gotten over it.

for example, i had a crush in 2015 on a girl who was secret, and due to a lack of attitude i never pursued it and the attraction died as far as i thought in 2016, in 2019 it was a time where i saw her a lot and it came back as before, and i noticed which is a pattern with me.

isn't there such a thing as naturally erasing what you feel for someone over time? simply following things.

nothing expressed in the astrological area indirectly saying that you are prone to being someone who ignores the bad in others and focuses on the good moments…?
in a toxic way, i remember the 7th house in pluto and 7th in mars, like this.

something on the 'humiliation' level happened recently with a girl and what i feel for her now hasn't changed much, it's still intense and strong, unshakable.
but, my dignity exists.

What you feel can be attached and replaced by any girl of the same extension of what you connected about her, and I know this might sound harsh on both ends.

Uniqueness, and absolute devotion in love, that is also not consumed, like you didn't had sex or started a family, is extremely rare.

Find the right girls, those who want you like air, you have to be a little bit arrogant in your pursuit of an ideal girl, as you have to make a statement of being the real deal. Being very emotional is very fine, but keep this regulated outside of you. Liking girls, maybe being rejected and so on is totally normal. At a point you have to switch up and be a little bit more decided, stronger and firm with your desires and wants in life and with age. Along with this, you won't have to ponder your emotions time and energy with girls that are not worth it.

As with age as well, each girl will be a certain type, and that certain type is shared by plenty of girls as well, and in all girls of your standard, you can find as a man everything you desire physically and spiritually. That crush, that secret love, that first time, will influence you a lot, but they don't matter at all in the grand scheme of things and there is plenty of this to have.

Also, as a rite of passage, it should be standard, for you and all young boys to have a broken heart, in good faith for your creative and spiritual wake up to reality. Meaning that all of this is natural and happens to all, one way or another.

You should be happy that you feel all of this, as it means that you are alive and functioning just fine. Not feeling life and people, love and heartbreak, is an ugly and depressive existence. The question is, how do you use all of this?

 

[nebu]

You should be happy that you feel all of this, as it means that you are alive and functioning just fine. Not feeling life and people, love and heartbreak, is an ugly and depressive existence. The question is, how do you use all of this?

you using 1% of your power is still phenomenal :lol:

thank you very much, i will remove certain things with extreme urgency after the transit.

i will not use the bad episode of contact with her to stay on top of the situation or try to attack, she is worthy of pity and i will keep by my side, my kundalini truly It made me a kinder human, but i'm not an idiot.

she is just proud and traumatized, the fire burns in her and she pretends not to feel it, even though my intuition and sensitivity are in full activity with the signs and around her.

a woman who hasn't grown up, and doesn't even seem like she will.

we'll see who has more power and influence, her over her, or me.
it goes until i want to continue.

 

[General Yeager]

You should be happy that you feel all of this, as it means that you are alive and functioning just fine. Not feeling life and people, love and heartbreak, is an ugly and depressive existence. The question is, how do you use all of this?

you using 1% of your power is still phenomenal :lol:

thank you very much, i will remove certain things with extreme urgency after the transit.

i will not use the bad episode of contact with her to stay on top of the situation or try to attack, she is worthy of pity and i will keep by my side, my kundalini truly It made me a kinder human, but i'm not an idiot.

she is just proud and traumatized, the fire burns in her and she pretends not to feel it, even though my intuition and sensitivity are in full activity with the signs and around her.

a woman who hasn't grown up, and doesn't even seem like she will.

we'll see who has more power and influence, her over her, or me.
it goes until i want to continue.

In time you'll learn that the feelings in your heart and the idealism in your mind in not being felt by the other person. And that realization is very freeing. The most easy way for this to happen is for you to reject a girl and she acts all needy and angry and sad. That will make sense of all of your negative experiences with women. There are too many options and too much power in you given by our Father to act like this. When you want something you take it with the Solar Fire of Lucifer ,without remorse. All of the world is for your taking. Just get out of your own way.

 

[Henu the Great]

Attraction is not negotiable. Men make the decision to go with the woman, but the woman decides who they want. It is up to man to pay attention as to what their options are. If a man is not satisfied with the options available then he needs to change himself. The options available for men are reflections of the man himself.

 

[nebu]

There are too many options and too much power in you given by our Father to act like this. When you want something you take it with the Solar Fire of Lucifer ,without remorse. All of the world is for your taking. Just get out of your own way.

you said wise and hidden words, very well expressed, about Lucifer's SOLAR FIRE.

i received a considerable force of power when my kundalini made some movements in my solar chakra, resulting in a manifestation of desires and words much faster and easier, without having a lot of awareness and rune ceremonies, talking idle is already worth a lot.

and definitely, if i want it ima have it.

what i often repeat is that my power is divine and i am an emperor, there is no stopping me, i always conquer my desires easily, without opposition.

i am in progress and i see everything clearly being perfected by the god in me.

The options available for men are reflections of the man himself.

yes sir.

 

[nebu]

venting my situation and giving final considerations.

she initially didn't want anything deeper, it was already clear the mistake was my fault after all, but given my emotional circumstances and transit, i persisted consciously and thought it would turn the situation in a positive way for something better.

i imagined that my kundalini having already done something in my body and soul would be enough to overcome MANY OWN BLOCKAGES regarding the attraction of healthy people in relationships that i have NEVER REMOVED for now;
HORROROUS transit that obscures your true essence and in other people's view you are distorted;
someone who is a wall and completely wrong, in what i'm looking for.

i have literally tested my power and peace, two extremes i have always sought, and they are absolutely sharp.

i went through a kind of mental breakdown, yes, but you know when your life is going really well and nothing really different happens that leaves you burning to do something?
i went as far as i could, it motivated me a little.

yesterday i was not talking directly, much less paying attention to her, at the club what she did was come close and look at me, checking indirectly, and she was talking to her friends or whoever was there, it always involved a conversation about picking up someone or literally went and kissed anyone and there were several, it was with two people at once, one of the greatest scenes of empowered women i've seen in my life, zero criteria.

i felt exaggeratedly everything bad seeing that, and i was surprised, even though i did the void meditation every day, being someone positive and well resolved, my aura screamed loudly that sadness and problems took over me, i was just in my corner there in the crowd nearby, who kept saying that i looked bad, sad and very shaken, they offered too much support out of compassion, and i responded very well, denying that there was nothing apparent, no one believed me.

THOR was on my side and immediately present in the environment and supporting me.
when this emotional bomb exploded, a guy said Jupiter twice, out of nowhere, and i listened.

then i gave a new meaning to everything, i was completely fine and normal in minutes, i enjoyed the end of the night and i understood the signal, in seconds.

“the utmost of masculine strength”
“the mighty”
“the basileus”.