Feeling misguided and and kinda a failure

[Ponko555]

Hello to all. Before getting into the subject please let me clarify that despite being an internet user for many years this is actually my first forum post ever. So please forgive me for not following "procedure".

So I "say" I have been a Satanist for almost 13 years... I mean I fully believe in Father Satan and the demons, I had even dedicated my soul back in the day. But I feel totally useless when it comes to any "actual work" when it comes to meditation, communicating with demons in ANY form. I have never been able to properly go into a trance, as I feel my mind is hyperactive and I just CANOT filter out my thoughts entirely.

I have tried many times but I was never able to properly do it. I have no one else in my social circle to rely upon for help with this. So I was never able to progress... I feel an utter failure in this regard... I feel useless for Father Satan as I cannot offer him my "help" in exchange for what he has given me. Sometimes I even feel that it may all be in my head and I just THINK he is there for me and I feel that I may be delusional and he just doesn't hear me or maybe doesn't even want to communicate with me at ALL as I am such a useless Satanist...

At some point, I had tried to find out if there was a Guardian Demon for me. O thought maybe they could help me or guide me somehow. I don't remember the exact method I had used, to be honest. I think it was a pendulum going through a list while I had TRIED to go into a trance.

The answer was supposedly Astaroth but sometimes I feel this might not be true and she may have nothing to do with me...

I feel lost... I don't know how to actually progress, in order to advance "spiritually" so I can come closer to Satan and try to offer my "help" in any way I can...

Could you please try to help me get on my journey's path at last? I don't know what else to do...

Also if someone does have a close contact with Father Satan or Astaroth could you "ask" them about me? I am not even sure if this is how it is supposed to work...

I am very sorry for just rumbling... I hope I didn't upset anyone with what I said and maybe I can find the answers I need.

Thank you all!

 

[Gearshift]

Being 13 years as a Satanist, dedicated, doing something, and believing. Isn't bad or anything. I'm exactly the same only I did in 2003 while 12 and that is closing in on 20 years April of 2022.

Perhaps a better question since you provided said manner on your mindset is maybe your simply like me an intellectual-theoretical Satanist who delves into Spirituality.

Many people aren't gonna like what I'm gonna post nor like what I say. But the fact of the matter is your simply a Satanist out of fanaticism. Like George Lincoln Rockwell stated "We National Socialists are ideological, idealist, and fanatical. Ironically enough the communists are fanatical."

Perhaps your one of these people who are simply Satanists for the sake of being one. Ironically enough you never mentioned National Socialism maybe your NS and to a hardcore degree and study our websites and be NS. But the spiritual part is just for show.

Kinda like how some atheists state they are xtian(christian in this case) just to fit in but are actually more falling into communism i.e. atheism themselves. They are being hypocrites and when called upon they lash out.

There in my opinion nothing wrong with being a dedicated SS and NS who simply may do a meditation, may perform some spiritual warfare, may do nothing with spirituality. Hell maybe spirituality doesn't work it's just fake. But at least you keep the faith and realize this is far better than the judeo-bolshevik communism of the political communism(democracy, republic, communism itself, jewish socialism) and the spiritual side of the enemy(xtianity, islam, judiasm).

In other words your Triple-A(Against All Authority) the only authority you want is a healthy human body(not personal i.e. World-Wide) working to improve the lives of everyone like Hitler and company especially if you deep dive National Socialism. Like George Lincoln Rockwell states "Ones people study evolution they get a short-circuit and change. If you believe in evolution, science, and the application of truth you gotta be a Nazi if you think long and hard".

Maybe you have astrological chart issues maybe too much air or too little air maybe a backlash of elements. Maybe transition/transitions maybe something.

Either way don't feel bad for being a NS/SS personnel for the sake of being NS/SS. Just like even in the golden age of our Gods times not everyone wants or cares about spirituality. It's not just the lower/lesser especially criminal classes but also even for example a farmer who simply wishes to farm better doesn't want to be kundalini risen or magnum opus completed or whatever. It happened in the past and will happen in the future some people are just content hence NATIONAL SOCIALISM that others are doing better and in turn it trickles down unto them.

Look at coof-19 even smartphones are being hoarded by companies to have enough to meet supply and demand. Even many products we produced are being halted sometimes weeks or months later look at all the bullshit occurring for some damn less than the flu mortality rate virus.

I think your one of these people who has aspirations for spirituality but need someone or something to happen or procure happenings to advance them. I don't think judging from what you said you doubt even though you'd like some proof. But I think the fact we scientifically and intellectually understand things is proof enough for you.

You fit all the requirements but perhaps like me Spirituality isn't your thing. Maybe your just supposed to be one of these Aquarian masses that works with the human race. Like I said unless you receive extreme help and schooling on spirituality maybe you don't have what it takes to push it.

Like I said Intellectual and or Intellectual-Theoretical Satanist.

 

[Serbon]

Hello to all. Before getting into the subject please let me clarify that despite being an internet user for many years this is actually my first forum post ever. So please forgive me for not following "procedure".

So I "say" I have been a Satanist for almost 13 years... I mean I fully believe in Father Satan and the demons, I had even dedicated my soul back in the day. But I feel totally useless when it comes to any "actual work" when it comes to meditation, communicating with demons in ANY form. I have never been able to properly go into a trance, as I feel my mind is hyperactive and I just CANOT filter out my thoughts entirely.

I have tried many times but I was never able to properly do it. I have no one else in my social circle to rely upon for help with this. So I was never able to progress... I feel an utter failure in this regard... I feel useless for Father Satan as I cannot offer him my "help" in exchange for what he has given me. Sometimes I even feel that it may all be in my head and I just THINK he is there for me and I feel that I may be delusional and he just doesn't hear me or maybe doesn't even want to communicate with me at ALL as I am such a useless Satanist...

At some point, I had tried to find out if there was a Guardian Demon for me. O thought maybe they could help me or guide me somehow. I don't remember the exact method I had used, to be honest. I think it was a pendulum going through a list while I had TRIED to go into a trance.

The answer was supposedly Astaroth but sometimes I feel this might not be true and she may have nothing to do with me...

I feel lost... I don't know how to actually progress, in order to advance "spiritually" so I can come closer to Satan and try to offer my "help" in any way I can...

Could you please try to help me get on my journey's path at last? I don't know what else to do...

Also if someone does have a close contact with Father Satan or Astaroth could you "ask" them about me? I am not even sure if this is how it is supposed to work...

I am very sorry for just rumbling... I hope I didn't upset anyone with what I said and maybe I can find the answers I need.

Thank you all!

How often do you meditate, and what meditations do you use?

 

[Mastermind]

In other words your Triple-A(Against All Authority) the only authority you want is a healthy human body(not personal i.e. World-Wide) working to improve the lives of everyone like Hitler and company especially if you deep dive National Socialism.

There is a difference between following authority and following a leader.
One is involuntary, the other is voluntary.
We follow Satan because we want to, not because we have to.

My advice to Ponko555 is to do hypnosis with a hypnotist for a while. This will train your brain to relax and empty the mind. I highly recommend Nimja.
https://www.youtube.com/c/NimjaHypnosis/videos
Once you manage to go into trace with him, I recommend doing his deep reset which will remove triggers both from him and other hypnotists (especially if you watch TV, you may be hypnotized without even knowing it).
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vjlibX53x4
I do his deep reset once a month.

 

[Reyra]

It's a long period of time. Everyone develops differently, some people notice and make progress slower, others may see the effects more quickly.
One question arises, as you didn't write whether you meditate: Have you meditated daily? Have you started the 40-day program and continued your meditation after that? You should never miss a day. If you meditated, then what kind of meditation you were doing? Can you feel your chakras and energy? If so, keep going, meditate. Also, do more void meditation, this should turn off unwanted thoughts. Entering trance takes a lot of practice and patience (though not for everyone as it may be easier for others), so don't give up and keep trying. Before trying to enter a trance try to do some breathing exercises:
https://www.satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/Breathing666.html

If you haven't meditated, I suggest you take it seriously, if you want results. If you are not motivated, patient and organized, results are out of the question. Make a schedule, there is time for everything, and no excuses.
And don't call yourself useless, it won't help you. Just don't stress about it and keep meditating every day. It's a long path, but the results will be worth it. You need to be strong and don't give up. Good luck.

 

[SShiva_fr]

You are probably using your left brain too much. Aka the mind. And certainly too much air in your natal chart.
Don't take this as a criticism...I am like you.
The way is elsewhere: in the right brain, feeling.

My husband is not consecrated, thinks that Satan is the God of the Joos ..
But...He knows "Enki".
He has a long experience of the occult, of the astral, of astral travel, of the powers of the chakras, has a clairaudience and a clairvoyance since...always? As far back as he can remember anyway.

Why? Because he is in the feeling, connected to his right brain. He has it in him, he is an intrepid adventurer of the interior and the occult. He must be an old soul who has known our Gods.
If I could even tell you everything, you wouldn't believe me. He is a beloved of Father Satan. I am sure of it.

Every time we talk about this, I realize that he has a lot of knowledge about JoS, but he never studied! How is this possible? He doesn't have a long daily schedule like mine. And yet he knows instinctively, he experiments and feels. He feels no fear, he is a hard spiritualist.

And I... well, I'm a loser. But I hang in there, I'm very strong willed and I love Father Satan. I love this path. So maybe anything is possible, but...

All this to say that... It's like that, there are those who have it in them, almost innately, and the slightest knowledge will exponentially increase their innate predispositions. And then there are the others. They will need a lot of work and a lot of letting go, especially, to stop mentalizing everything, to achieve a small progression.

This is only my opinion and the experience I have in front of me.

 

[livelucifer]

I was like you in these two years

it's better to use feeling in these cases, the logical part of your brain simply doesn't accept the presence of Satan.
if you are honest with yourself, you feel him and you have evidence that your brain can't ignore it,That's why you are here now،He has already answered you!

About thoughts,For my own thoughts I use black color, my mind is hyperactive and this color is really soothing for me.
About your feelings، ask Satan how you can help him.
If you meditating, and want to progress, these are temporary.

Also,I was always avoided contact with Demons and Satan because I was afraid of hearing the wrong answer،
This was to my detriment.