Help me with my Sexual Orientation please

[slyscorpion]

I finally came to the realization about why I was so hung up about my gender and I was talking and ranting about it a lot before even on here sometimes.

I don't find myself really caring for feminine people that much as I just don't relate to it. I am finally willing to admit it to everyone. This is where my problem came in. I am probably not extremely feminine myself even though I am not much like most guys as I am more soft and sensitive. In all relationships though I fufilled the feminine side or role both sexually and in what I do (if indeed relationships have these roles like everyone says) I like both girls and guys who are more masculine. However were a girl to be totally feminine (which is the way most girls seem to act I am frustrated with this cause I do find women sexually pleasing but I find this energy and expression to be a turn off and I am unable to feel sexually attracted to it that easily or seemingly at all) I would not feel any sexual attraction at all. If I cannot connect on an energy level or feel like I am connecting to a person I can get no sexual turn on at all. It is literally somewhat impossible for me to focus on sex at all if I cannot somehow connect with the person. Even in my sexual fantasies with just solo masturbation I have to add the element of connecting with a person to be able to be successful (This is where the problem comes in as I do have four planets in the 8th house and two of them are in Scorpio so I have an above average need for sex and I get kind of unbalanced if after awhile I cannot furfill that with someone) I finally figured out this is why I don't care for most porn and can't get turned on by it not to mention the Jewish vibe in some of it. I just find it either disgusting or too feminine clean not real etc not sure how to say this.

I am wondering if I am actually gay in some way. I like girls and can very much feel turned on sexually by girls but just not people who are feminine in energy much at all. This is the main reason why I was rarely able to get off on having sex with a girl. If a woman is more like the guys in the way she expresses herself or energy I much like it.

This is too the point I cannot get turned on sexually by either genders at all if they are too feminine. I am indeed probably more attracted to women but I wonder if that is just programming because I was bought up in an xtian household where they didn't accept gays.

I also can be really attracted to masculine guys. Not like the mean tough people but more like the Noble warrior type that the ancients referred to as Masculine.

I myself am a little more feminine in the way I act to the point I don't get along with a lot of guys cause they think I am gay or a [email protected] or whatever and am scared by me.

So what am I at least now I am willing to accept this and face it and not be scared by this realization anymore. I finally figured out what was going on.

This all sucks cause it means I probably won't be able to find a partner that fits what I am looking for. At least not in today's world.

Note I didn't at all bring up the way people dress or fit in the social roles for genders cause I think it's all a bunch of bullshit or dinosaur shit from the Paleolithic age would be a better way to put it.

I am talking about actual feminine and Masculine. I would fit very much the ancients classification of Masucline but be considered feminine by the standards of today maybe totally.

According to the energy I get from the God's when I focus on them I AM completely masculine according to that archatype although I'm not fully sure I'd be attracted to feminine in that sense either at least I would be able to connect with people who lived out the more natural aspects of these energies.

This is my thinking. I don't know if I will find an actual physical human I can relate to this is why I am trying to open up so much but I still have a lot of energy to cleanse from when I fucked around with drugs and stuff. However this kind of thing is the reason I kind of almost still want drugs. To escape from this messed up world where I don't know how to truly relate to anyone no not even my friend who I talked about on a totally deep and meaningful level. Most people on planet Earth have turned into boring and superficial drones who wouldn't know what meaning or depth meant at all even if they were staring at it in the face and don't realize they have no value or meaning cause any value and meaning has to be created by becoming really powerful spiritually and / or doing something really big or important in the material world or both. This whole planet sucks and is superficial and has a lack of meaning.

This is just my thoughts would anyone help me in finding someone or something I can relate to

[EvilWang]

This is something only you can decide and explore. Doing it any other way would take the fun out of it and pretty much kill any true developement as an individual. Long post short answer. These things take time but its up to you to make it a good time. Get it?

[Zeffie of the Wind]

If you want to and enjoy sex with a girl then you like girls. If you want guys then you are into guys. If you do both then you like both. Everything else is personal preference. Just cuz you like a certain sex doesnt mean you will like and have intercourse with "just anyone" of that sex. No need to be so hung up on it. You like what you like.

[Dahaarkan]

Make an effort to meet people and make close friends you can have sex with. The only real way to be sure what you're really into is to try different things with different people.

You might find you are completely uncomfortable having sex with a man.

[Aldrick Strickland]

I finally came to the realization about why I was so hung up about my gender and I was talking and ranting about it a lot before even on here sometimes.

I don't find myself really caring for feminine people that much as I just don't relate to it. I am finally willing to admit it to everyone. This is where my problem came in. I am probably not extremely feminine myself even though I am not much like most guys as I am more soft and sensitive. In all relationships though I fufilled the feminine side or role both sexually and in what I do (if indeed relationships have these roles like everyone says) I like both girls and guys who are more masculine. However were a girl to be totally feminine (which is the way most girls seem to act I am frustrated with this cause I do find women sexually pleasing but I find this energy and expression to be a turn off and I am unable to feel sexually attracted to it that easily or seemingly at all) I would not feel any sexual attraction at all. If I cannot connect on an energy level or feel like I am connecting to a person I can get no sexual turn on at all. It is literally somewhat impossible for me to focus on sex at all if I cannot somehow connect with the person. Even in my sexual fantasies with just solo masturbation I have to add the element of connecting with a person to be able to be successful (This is where the problem comes in as I do have four planets in the 8th house and two of them are in Scorpio so I have an above average need for sex and I get kind of unbalanced if after awhile I cannot furfill that with someone) I finally figured out this is why I don't care for most porn and can't get turned on by it not to mention the Jewish vibe in some of it. I just find it either disgusting or too feminine clean not real etc not sure how to say this.

I am wondering if I am actually gay in some way. I like girls and can very much feel turned on sexually by girls but just not people who are feminine in energy much at all. This is the main reason why I was rarely able to get off on having sex with a girl. If a woman is more like the guys in the way she expresses herself or energy I much like it.

This is too the point I cannot get turned on sexually by either genders at all if they are too feminine. I am indeed probably more attracted to women but I wonder if that is just programming because I was bought up in an xtian household where they didn't accept gays.

I also can be really attracted to masculine guys. Not like the mean tough people but more like the Noble warrior type that the ancients referred to as Masculine.

I myself am a little more feminine in the way I act to the point I don't get along with a lot of guys cause they think I am gay or a [email protected] or whatever and am scared by me.

So what am I at least now I am willing to accept this and face it and not be scared by this realization anymore. I finally figured out what was going on.

This all sucks cause it means I probably won't be able to find a partner that fits what I am looking for. At least not in today's world.

Note I didn't at all bring up the way people dress or fit in the social roles for genders cause I think it's all a bunch of bullshit or dinosaur shit from the Paleolithic age would be a better way to put it.

I am talking about actual feminine and Masculine. I would fit very much the ancients classification of Masucline but be considered feminine by the standards of today maybe totally.

According to the energy I get from the God's when I focus on them I AM completely masculine according to that archatype although I'm not fully sure I'd be attracted to feminine in that sense either at least I would be able to connect with people who lived out the more natural aspects of these energies.

This is my thinking. I don't know if I will find an actual physical human I can relate to this is why I am trying to open up so much but I still have a lot of energy to cleanse from when I fucked around with drugs and stuff. However this kind of thing is the reason I kind of almost still want drugs. To escape from this messed up world where I don't know how to truly relate to anyone no not even my friend who I talked about on a totally deep and meaningful level. Most people on planet Earth have turned into boring and superficial drones who wouldn't know what meaning or depth meant at all even if they were staring at it in the face and don't realize they have no value or meaning cause any value and meaning has to be created by becoming really powerful spiritually and / or doing something really big or important in the material world or both. This whole planet sucks and is superficial and has a lack of meaning.

This is just my thoughts would anyone help me in finding someone or something I can relate to

You people fuss about the strangest things. I dont fit into any mold sir. I have personalities that are extremely masculine as well as ones that are feminine. I get bored with being Masculine all the time.

I just let it flow. I do not go by such titles as straight,gay,Bi. I like what I like.

Have you ever thought of being with a guy and and girl at the same time? This isnt something to force. Just let it be. Also the soul shifts. So suddenly you may only like girls, a few months later it shift the complete other way.

Also you have your type. 95 percent of guys I have no attraction too. People act like oh look their queers theyll take to one another. One guy heard about me so he lunged himself at me to kiss me. I stopped him and threw him off me.

[Jack]

I finally came to the realization about why I was so hung up about my gender and I was talking and ranting about it a lot before even on here sometimes.

I don't find myself really caring for feminine people that much as I just don't relate to it. I am finally willing to admit it to everyone. This is where my problem came in. I am probably not extremely feminine myself even though I am not much like most guys as I am more soft and sensitive. In all relationships though I fufilled the feminine side or role both sexually and in what I do (if indeed relationships have these roles like everyone says) I like both girls and guys who are more masculine. However were a girl to be totally feminine (which is the way most girls seem to act I am frustrated with this cause I do find women sexually pleasing but I find this energy and expression to be a turn off and I am unable to feel sexually attracted to it that easily or seemingly at all) I would not feel any sexual attraction at all. If I cannot connect on an energy level or feel like I am connecting to a person I can get no sexual turn on at all. It is literally somewhat impossible for me to focus on sex at all if I cannot somehow connect with the person. Even in my sexual fantasies with just solo masturbation I have to add the element of connecting with a person to be able to be successful (This is where the problem comes in as I do have four planets in the 8th house and two of them are in Scorpio so I have an above average need for sex and I get kind of unbalanced if after awhile I cannot furfill that with someone) I finally figured out this is why I don't care for most porn and can't get turned on by it not to mention the Jewish vibe in some of it. I just find it either disgusting or too feminine clean not real etc not sure how to say this.

I am wondering if I am actually gay in some way. I like girls and can very much feel turned on sexually by girls but just not people who are feminine in energy much at all. This is the main reason why I was rarely able to get off on having sex with a girl. If a woman is more like the guys in the way she expresses herself or energy I much like it.

This is too the point I cannot get turned on sexually by either genders at all if they are too feminine. I am indeed probably more attracted to women but I wonder if that is just programming because I was bought up in an xtian household where they didn't accept gays.

I also can be really attracted to masculine guys. Not like the mean tough people but more like the Noble warrior type that the ancients referred to as Masculine.

I myself am a little more feminine in the way I act to the point I don't get along with a lot of guys cause they think I am gay or a [email protected] or whatever and am scared by me.

So what am I at least now I am willing to accept this and face it and not be scared by this realization anymore. I finally figured out what was going on.

This all sucks cause it means I probably won't be able to find a partner that fits what I am looking for. At least not in today's world.

Note I didn't at all bring up the way people dress or fit in the social roles for genders cause I think it's all a bunch of bullshit or dinosaur shit from the Paleolithic age would be a better way to put it.

I am talking about actual feminine and Masculine. I would fit very much the ancients classification of Masucline but be considered feminine by the standards of today maybe totally.

According to the energy I get from the God's when I focus on them I AM completely masculine according to that archatype although I'm not fully sure I'd be attracted to feminine in that sense either at least I would be able to connect with people who lived out the more natural aspects of these energies.

This is my thinking. I don't know if I will find an actual physical human I can relate to this is why I am trying to open up so much but I still have a lot of energy to cleanse from when I fucked around with drugs and stuff. However this kind of thing is the reason I kind of almost still want drugs. To escape from this messed up world where I don't know how to truly relate to anyone no not even my friend who I talked about on a totally deep and meaningful level. Most people on planet Earth have turned into boring and superficial drones who wouldn't know what meaning or depth meant at all even if they were staring at it in the face and don't realize they have no value or meaning cause any value and meaning has to be created by becoming really powerful spiritually and / or doing something really big or important in the material world or both. This whole planet sucks and is superficial and has a lack of meaning.

This is just my thoughts would anyone help me in finding someone or something I can relate to

You might be gay

[Eric13]

The only real way to be sure what you're really into is to try different things with different people.

You might find you are completely uncomfortable having sex with a man.

That’s terrible advice. That’s how people create hangups. Especially with sexuality, a person shouldn’t do something they’re uncomfortable with. Things like this a person will know and the OP has already made it clear he’s attracted to men and women just has a certain type.

I’ve heard people suggest this before and it’s lunacy. I don’t need to try interracial to know if I’m into it. With sexuality do what makes you comfortable and what you enjoy. Serious hangups and blockages can be made otherwise. I don’t need to have sex with a man to realize I’m not gay. That would be horrible and I would be out of it for a while. Then a person has to recover and deal with new blockages they shouldn’t have had to deal with in the first place.

If a person is really confused, just focus on meditation and removing blockages related to this. Their feelings will become clear soon enough.

I don’t mean to sound rude at all with this reply, I just think it’s dangerous to tell people to go and experiment in this manner. Experimenting is fine, to degree, if you’re comfortable with it only.

[Ol argedco luciftias]

So you want a strong fiery girl to be in charge and tell you what to do? Me too

[Dahaarkan]

i dont understand english lol

I meant that in the context that he recently has "discovered" that he is into men, and that after trying he may discover he doesn't like it at all. I've had this happen before. Guys see something on the internet or create a fantasy in their mind and then when they actually try it out they don't like it at all.

It's something he is confused about and thinks he wants. So I say the only way to be sure is to try.

[Azorm]

I know that usually cleaning of 2. And 4. chakra changes your life a lot, you will just evolve in completely another direction sexually in some cases.

5. chakra if dirty might also produce problems in relationships as emotions might be blocked but also 3. chakra if dirty too much can be pain in the ass as it can produce intense feelings of being unworthy of having a partner.

I remember before this all cleaning I used to believe I was monogamous and straight. Then suddenly I noticed I like to have fantasies about more partners. It confused me. And sometimes I would even think about females. I felt guilt about it all, I was heavily sexually repressed for most of my life, I never even wanted to find a relief properly, so I was super late at finding out those things. I even had period of being asexual since my 2. chakra was too dirty. Then I had to experiment a lot and changed many partners, ruined myself as crazy because I thought I just must be mono and straight, then I decided to try some new stuff. Eventually I felt better and better about some stuff as I cleaned my soul, and I learned more about what do I want.

Now I realized who am I and what and who do I need. After I removed some hang-ups it's so much easier to see. I'm trying now to be more relaxed with relaxed people and Demon lovers who can give me freedom but also to connect to me nicely without much drama. I don't think we should be pressured by anybody here, we need to clean ourselves from jewish curses, hang-ups and to slowly start understanding more about what do we need really.

Being gay or whatever is also fine. So many guys tend to stress soooooo much about it, they feel like they are less of a man because of it, but i don't think so, even if they are more feminine it's okay after all. I also refuse to believe having more partners is bad, who cares lol. Also what is important is to do soul freeing from some past ties if you feel they might be shutting you off in some way now.