Is this an illness?

Satanic Path · Jun 7, 2020

I'm really struggling with understanding who I am.
Is It normal to be totally repulsed by sex but not by masturbation?
I like boys, and I'm sure of It.
But when I think about having sex with a boy I really freak out and feel unconfortable.
I don't know if the world "Asexual" comes from the enemy or if you think It could be natural.
I don't know why I dislike sex... I hope this doesn't make me too weird.
It's something that Is happening to me since few months, and I don't understand why.
Can a trauma have caused this?
I know that sex Is beautiful and healthy, and important, but I feel like I don't care.
The only sex I want to have is with a Demon, that would be my dream.
I would really like to have a relationship with a God, but not with a human.
I think that a Demon can give me more than everything I need.
Anyway, a long time will go by before I can see and feel Demons, but I think that the wait will be worth It.
Tell me what you think, if you believe that my "non-sexuality" Is weird.
In the case It Is not Natural, I will work on It and find the reason that made me "asexual".
Satanic blessings!

Ol argedco luciftias · Jun 8, 2020

If you are young, you probably shouldn't be having any sex anyway. Don't do it if you don't want to, there is nothing wrong with that. Wait until you are older, and find a good quality person.

Fuchs · Jun 8, 2020

Satanic Path said:
I'm really struggling with understanding who I am.
Is It normal to be totally repulsed by sex but not by masturbation?
I like boys, and I'm sure of It.
But when I think about having sex with a boy I really freak out and feel unconfortable.
I don't know if the world "Asexual" comes from the enemy or if you think It could be natural.
I don't know why I dislike sex... I hope this doesn't make me too weird.
It's something that Is happening to me since few months, and I don't understand why.
Can a trauma have caused this?
I know that sex Is beautiful and healthy, and important, but I feel like I don't care.
The only sex I want to have is with a Demon, that would be my dream.
I would really like to have a relationship with a God, but not with a human.
I think that a Demon can give me more than everything I need.
Anyway, a long time will go by before I can see and feel Demons, but I think that the wait will be worth It.
Tell me what you think, if you believe that my "non-sexuality" Is weird.
In the case It Is not Natural, I will work on It and find the reason that made me "asexual".
Satanic blessings!

I did read here some storys from members who were in a monogamous relationship with demons over different livetimes.

Maybe you are such a person.

I would say fokus on satans sigil

and ask him if you have a demon lover and if jes, if he could make it happen, that you know who it is in some way.
Stay open, don´t expect an answer.

Shael · Jun 9, 2020

Satanic Path said:
...

It's normal, don't worry. Over time this should go away on its own. If you want to get rid of it faster, try a working with RAUM or SURYA with an affirmation to free you from all sexual hangups and traumas.

Ol argedco luciftias · Jun 9, 2020

Don't do anything that you don't want to do. And don't try to force yourself to want something that you don't want. You are your own self, your soul knows what is best for you, so don't do anything that goes against your natural feelings.

Satanic Path · Jun 10, 2020

Ol argedco luciftias said:
Don't do anything that you don't want to do. And don't try to force yourself to want something that you don't want. You are your own self, your soul knows what is best for you, so don't do anything that goes against your natural feelings.

Thanks for your time.
I promised to myself that I would try sex at least once, and in the case I don't like it, well, I can say I tried.
I'm Just worried that this could not be natural, but I hope One day I can ask The Gods about It.

Ol argedco luciftias · Jun 11, 2020

Do you want some guy who does not care about you at all in any way and all he is looking for is just a hole to put his dick into? Or do you want to find a good person first where you really care about each other? Don't rush and pick just anybody just because you want to try it. First find the person who is right for you, who really cares about you.

Sundara · Jul 3, 2020

You are 100% normal, no need to over analyze yourself. You won’t really fully know yourself until you’re in your twenties and your brain is fully developed.

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