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Patenting - “Animal Instincts”

Sundara

Active member
Joined
Jan 20, 2020
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1,562
Being a parent comes with an entirely new set of challenges and concerns, as well as a massive influx of bullshit information from society on who you should be, what you should do, how you should do it. People who are out of touch with themselves subscribe to it and lose their sense of sanity.

To follow on Cobras recent post about animal drives, for women this new drive we have when we have kids is all about protecting your kids and I believe it to be the strongest drive a human can even have. The amygdala is something that activates in new parents after being dormant. Learning to be rational and controlling this is essential for sanity and happens to be probably the most difficult. It can suck the life out of you and make what’s supposed to be joyful the most miserable thing. They often wind up working against your child’s best interest. Conversely if this is suppressed and non-existent it makes for a pretty shit parent if you ask me.

These forces often drive mothers to a breaking point and -literal- insanity. I hear all too often about it. I don’t know a single mother friend of mine who doesn’t suffer in some way from this, aside from one friend. She happens to be heavily spiritual and although non ss, a great person and she’s very relaxed. Her kid is happy and also wonderful to have around. Most kids are wonderful to have around for me but hers in particular. Not to brag, but mine happen to be as well. Don’t get me wrong, kids are always going to be kids, but being a Satanist and understanding ourselves gives us the advantage of raising kids well as well. I’ve objectively observed a lot of kids over the years, and mine are certainly coming up better than most. Neither of us are always put together, we’re not completely worry free, but we also express our emotions in a healthy way and know what is most important.

What is not most important is how many extracurricular activities you can put your kid into, how perfect your relationship is, how amazing your house is, how many different experiences you can give them, ect. It’s about who you are and how you handle your entire life as a person that gets passed onto them. With that, kid can surpass more obstacles than a child who was given a pasty perfect image but suffered from unintentional or intentional abuse at home. Kids need love and understanding and acceptance, so you can give them all of the most superficial things but they’ll still suffer without that basic sense of security and love.

Things might happen that are entirely out of your control but what you can control is who you are and show them that person daily. When you worry, your worries become theirs. If you make a situation absolutely devastating, they will perceive it that way. Kids are impressionable in every regard. By all means be completely human around them, you cannot expect yourself to be some kind of robot like many moms try to be. I have a friend who is a raging asshole consistently, and speaks to her kids horribly. So, it’s no surprise that her kid goes up to anyone and has the audacity to punch them and call them an asshole. She doesn’t understand why my kid is so well behaved and hers isn’t, because we share similar frustrations daily. It’s because I don’t take it out on my kid and I know how to detach from small frustrations.

I could go on and on about the list of pitfalls and things I see parents do that affect their kids very badly but as Satanists we learn what these are.

My spiritual friend and I also happen to be the only set of parents I know who are not on anti-depressants or xanax. Or are alcoholics. We also make time for what we love and have sex. It’s a really sad reality to see that this is the situation of such a great number of parents. They become so dehumanized and this isn’t healthy for kids either. Too many of them feel guilty for completely normal things, and a lot of this is just what we call “mom brain” and the natural laws of motherhood. It’s “natural” but not healthily expressed. For example, finally stepping out of the house by yourself and instantly feeling a sense of guilt after not stepping out by yourself for months. Or the kids are completely fine and good until the moment you reach for something to do on your own and all hell breaks loose. It’s normal to feel this way until a certain point. It can be way over-fed into. Like a 7 year old who cannot attend school because they cannot be away from their mother despite having no trauma and a “flawless” life.

Being able to provide a certain level of financial or physical security is important, don’t get me wrong. I only mean that in regard to having the biggest and best of everything. When it comes to food on the table and shelter that is priority. Kids need to have all of their basic survival needs fully met to better be able to go to a higher state into adulthood.

Being able to detach from concerns as a parent, others negative input, and having a good understanding of yourself as a spiritual person is essential for happiness in parenthood and happy children.

And actually, had I been more knowledgeable about this instinct prior to having higher spiritual experiences, it would’ve MAYBE spared me an immense load. I don’t think anything could’ve gotten it through to me until my own form of a breaking point though. I have been more logical and relaxed than most but it’s just a strong and meaningful instinct that is there. That’s just the way it is. There’s this cage scene in the “You” series, where they say the weak spots always get revealed. I had all of my bases checked -except- for that one. I had good enough control over it prior to that but it was a weak spot that manifested itself in terrible ways. My worries as a parent manifested in many directions and became amplified. Those worries use to seem completely logical and to the rest of the normal population they are, but after a lot of suffering and exhaustion it’s all moot. Which is actually some advice from my own parents that just took them 18 years to learn. As satanists our learning is fast tracked.

Men can have similar instincts definitely, it’s just more of an important thing with moms.

Strip the expectations from others, the fear of the unknown, recognize what you can’t control and be okay with it. Fully accept that the love and basic needs you are providing to your kids are enough, even if you have to work around a society that makes it difficult to provide that much. Make time for yourself, be willing to accept what you need and get that. You’ll find happiness in parenthood.
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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