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Chronic exhaustion, fatigue, procrastination. Etc.

SatanicSlytherin

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For the record, I'm 30. Female.

I'm rather tired all the time and don't know why.
I keep forgetting to do things even if I have a reminder in front of my face.

As for the procrastination, I've been a (dedicated) Satanist for 11 years and... as far as spiritual prowess goes, I may have as well started yesterday.
Nothing seems to motivate me to do much of anything spiritual for more than a couple days.
It took me about a year just to make this thread because I kept procrastinating and forgetting about making said thread.


(This is unrelated to the main topic I began typing about, but libido is in the negatives... mainly due to trauma / PTSD that happened about 7 years ago. I wish that was gone, but I feel like I can't really do anything about it at the moment.)
 
Tirnenn said:
For the record, I'm 30. Female.

I'm rather tired all the time and don't know why.
I keep forgetting to do things even if I have a reminder in front of my face.

As for the procrastination, I've been a (dedicated) Satanist for 11 years and... as far as spiritual prowess goes, I may have as well started yesterday.
Nothing seems to motivate me to do much of anything spiritual for more than a couple days.
It took me about a year just to make this thread because I kept procrastinating and forgetting about making said thread.


(This is unrelated to the main topic I began typing about, but libido is in the negatives... mainly due to trauma / PTSD that happened about 7 years ago. I wish that was gone, but I feel like I can't really do anything about it at the moment.)

All this you describe seems like you have bad attention on you, attack and lack of a daily meditation routine. It is crucial to do cleaning and protection at least once a day, and every time you feel uncomfortable, or a pressure, or when starting to lose your focus, or generally when the symptoms you usually have take place.
Create small goals, one step at a time, but you need to keep moving. Never skip a day. It's the enemy's trick to make us postpone and postpone and forget our meditations and disorganise us.
Another thing, you should see if any person has a negative effect on you, and remove the influence.

As for your libido, usually when our bioelectricity is low, libido is low too (Low bioelectocity can even lead to depressive symptoms).
Choose some meditations you like, and do them daily. Exercise, do some yoga, improve your diet, refresh your mind and body.
How is your health? You could even lack of vitamins etc.

Clean, empower, and do the final RTR daily.

As for the trauma you refer, I believe it is better first to focus on the above, and when you feel better you could do some healing and take off all negative influences it caused you. Usually PTSD needs time. It must feel difficult for you to deal with it, but eventually you will be able to. Meditation will help you a lot in every way and aspect.
 
Tirnenn said:
For the record, I'm 30. Female.

I'm rather tired all the time and don't know why.
I keep forgetting to do things even if I have a reminder in front of my face.

As for the procrastination, I've been a (dedicated) Satanist for 11 years and... as far as spiritual prowess goes, I may have as well started yesterday.
Nothing seems to motivate me to do much of anything spiritual for more than a couple days.
It took me about a year just to make this thread because I kept procrastinating and forgetting about making said thread.


(This is unrelated to the main topic I began typing about, but libido is in the negatives... mainly due to trauma / PTSD that happened about 7 years ago. I wish that was gone, but I feel like I can't really do anything about it at the moment.)

For me did work out to change my daily aop affirmation to this one:

"I´m at all times spiritually, physically and mentaly: safe, secure, motivated, purified, protected, powerfull, strong, and healthy in a positive way for me." x18 reps

Don´t start on a void of course moon see SS Calendar->

https://www.ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=49621



For your trauma you could do a munka working or use this:

Deletion of unwanted memories.
https://www.ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?p=197991#p197991
 
Tirnenn said:
For the record, I'm 30. Female.

I'm rather tired all the time and don't know why.
I keep forgetting to do things even if I have a reminder in front of my face.

As for the procrastination, I've been a (dedicated) Satanist for 11 years and... as far as spiritual prowess goes, I may have as well started yesterday.
Nothing seems to motivate me to do much of anything spiritual for more than a couple days.
It took me about a year just to make this thread because I kept procrastinating and forgetting about making said thread.


(This is unrelated to the main topic I began typing about, but libido is in the negatives... mainly due to trauma / PTSD that happened about 7 years ago. I wish that was gone, but I feel like I can't really do anything about it at the moment.)
This sounds to me like low energy, negative energy, and possibly an enemy entity attached to your soul. Do you meditate everyday? Have you opened your chakras?

I recommend you try the Returning Curses meditation.
And when I feel tired, Chakra Spinning usually helps. :)

If the tiredness persists, try a more powerful meditation:
Freeing the Soul
How to Detach Unwanted People/Entities from Your Aura

And remember, this may not be an instant fix. If there is negative energy deeply entrenched in your soul, you may need to do extra meditations for a few weeks to see results.
 
Tirnenn said:

There is definitely some interplay with the trauma and its influence on your physical being. You will want to look at the afflicted chakras and either clean them or remove blockages to mitigate this. Besides a full working, general empowerment and physical yoga can also work towards fixing this.

This alone is probably not the sole reason for your fatigue/low motivation, because those symptoms seem only partially related, not entirely.

---------------------------------

You will want to evaluate your lifestyle: diet, sleep, exercise. Also pay attention to any symptoms you may be having, such as any aches or pains, dizziness, headaches, anything pertaining to digestion, mood, etc.

Fatigue is very broad, this can be a spleen deficiency, but can also be related to the kidneys or blood quality. Other symptoms will narrow this down.

Low motivation is a little more specific in that is more likely related to the yang of the body, such as low kidney yang. This would also explain low willpower/procrastination.

Libido is related to kidney yang, so it can be related, although of course there is more things involved with the trauma.

---------------------------------

If you are a skinny ("vata") type person, you probably need more nourishing, oily, and warming foods, such as meats and sweet foods like potatoes. An unbalanced skinny person is more likely to feel ungrounded, dizzy, weak, anxious, possibly manic or twitchy, diffuse mental state.

If you are a heavier ("kapha") type person, you need lighter and drier, but still warming and yang foods. Lots of veggies, lean meat, pungent or spicy foods. If you are unbalanced in a kapha way, you would be prone to weight gain, slow physically and mentally, depressed, lack of action, sleeping too much.

Classifying yourself with these body types, as well as looking at other symptoms, can narrow down what is likely ailing you.
Based on what you wrote, I am leaning towards vata.

---------------------------------

Describing the rest of your body:

How is your digestion: Constipation, diarrhea or non-solid stool, bloating, poor appetite, burping, any pains?

Sleep: Insomnia, feeling hot or sweating, waking up at specific hours or with pains. What time do you go to bed?

Diet: What exactly do you eat on a day to day basis? What kinds of veggies, carbs, and meats, and roughly how much proportionally? Any processed foods, any diet restrictions?

Other symptoms: Any feelings in your head? Heavy head, congestion, headaches... Feelings of heat or cold, cold limbs, feelings of weakness in the limbs. Feelings of palpitations in the heart? Irritability or anxiety? Dryness of the skin, lost luster of hair? Acne? Dull or pale face?

---------------------------------

Exercise wise:

Everyone benefits from some type of exercise. I would advise the Tibetan 5 Rites as an easy yoga routine that only takes a few minutes to begin with. This is a very simple routine that will energize your body and works well for all people.

Hatha yoga and cardio are also good, but I just try something easy if you have a hard time motivating yourself. You can listen to a video or music if that makes you more inclined.

You should also heavily focus on void meditation. VM increases your emotional regulation and can help you generate more willpower. With this willpower, you can then make better diet/exercises choices, then the ball gets rolling more in your favor.

---------------------------------

You should also cut out all video games, phone apps, youtube, or other unsafe distractions that only waste your time and desensitize your brain's dopamine functioning.

This might be hard to do if you don't feel that great, but just keep it in mind as something that can be dragged you down and wasting the energy that could be much better used elsewhere.

---------------------------------

Lastly, I would highly recommend you find a TCM clinician in your area. Prioritize this, as this will fast track your health improvement and elucidate any errors in your lifestyle choices. We can help you on the forums, but we aren't a substitute for an in-person professional. They can also quickly offer your herbs or acupuncture, giving very immediate results and stabilizing your energy.

Your symptoms might seem drastic, but this only means your health restoration will be greater! Prioritize working on solving whatever imbalances you may be having, as this is best investment of your time. Focus as hard as you can on this.
 
To add on, I seem to have a metric fuckton of food intolerances and allergies.
I don't think anything can be done about that, but I figured it was worth noting.

Sorry if my previous post seemed off; I was incoherent and not in the best of moods.
 
Tirnenn said:
To add on, I seem to have a metric fuckton of food intolerances and allergies.
I don't think anything can be done about that, but I figured it was worth noting.
Now that's interesting! I had the same problem before dedicating. I was allergic to almost everything, but it all cleared up about a year after dedicating, and practicing daily meditation. In particular, HP Hooded Cobra's 40-day meditation program helped me a lot:
40 Day Meditation Program
Kundalini & Hatha Yoga Routine
I hope the allergies go away eventually for you too!
 
Tirnenn said:
To add on, I seem to have a metric fuckton of food intolerances and allergies.
I don't think anything can be done about that, but I figured it was worth noting.

Sorry if my previous post seemed off; I was incoherent and not in the best of moods.

Generally, food allergies are related to low stomach qi, whereas allergies relating to sneezing/the nose are from low lung qi.

As far as boosting stomach qi: Eat your bigger meals earlier in the morning, not at night. Only eat warm/neutral foods and drinks, as cold saps the stomach of energy. Chew everything well and focus on the meal (if possible).

Things like carrots, squash, sweet potato, and grains all nourish the stomach and spleen. Something easy to make would be like canned soup. You can throw in rice with the soap to make it thicker, for example.
 
You have a blood and qi Deficiency.

Look up Ba Zhen Wan (8 treasures teapills).

Take this formula for 3 weeks and then come back and check in.

It contains 4 tonics for qi and 4 tonics for blood.
 
This is gonna be a long one, but thorough.

Maya said:

-I feel fairly strained when cleaning my aura and chakras.
Not sure if that's normal or not.
But I'll definitely start doing cleaning and protection every day.
I'm... not so sure I can do the RTR though. I don't have any privacy and my throat hurts way too easily when doing chanting / vibrations.
-As for people, only 2 people I come into physical contact with are an advanced Satanist and some guy who keeps to himself, doesn't bother anyone.
-The low bioelectricity makes sense.
-My diet consists of meat, animal products, vegetables. Occasionally chocolate. I tend to avoid sugar entirely (even if it's natural).
-Meditation first, deal with PTSD later... makes sense.

Fuchs said:

-Interesting. I'll add that "motivated" bit.
-Oddly enough I actually had started doing a Munka working years ago... but on the 36th day or so, a non-Satanist we live with decided to occupy the room I usually did the working in. I had no privacy, so I was unable to do that day in time. Come to think of it, accidentally stopping the working is probably why I rebounded so hard (became cripplingly depressed, gender dysphoria to the point where I identified as "no gender".) It was... horrible.

Soaring Eagle 666 said:
-I've had low energy pretty much my entire life. I have no clue if I have any negative energy or an unwanted entity on me.
-I very rarely meditate... seems every time I do, I meditate for a few days then my brain drops it out of my mind; I forget entirely. I tried opening my chakras yesterday but I don't think it's holding over today.
-I remember I did the Returning Curses thing one time, and it felt like my body kept twitching, seizing up and violently refusing to let go of whatever I was trying to get rid of. I can see about doing that working again.
-I do find the Chakra Spin to be easy to do, I'll add that to the list.
-Hopefully I can become more aware visually, spiritually, so I can keep an eye on myself (I'm blind spiritually at the moment). Extra meditations... ah.

Blitzkreig said:

-I'm not exactly sure which chakras are afflicted. I'm going to guess Sacral / 2nd because that's where the trauma originated from... maybe 6th Chakra too?
---------------------------------

-I think the only thing truly wrong with my lifestyle is that I sit in my chair too much. Catch-22 of being tired as a default.
-I also don't seem to have a set bedtime... 9pm, 11pm, 4am, 6am are just a few of the times for the past week.
-I've noticed I've had slight kidney pain the past few weeks, but it got better after we moved to a new place with more than 1 bathroom (one of the people I live with takes 45-60m in there! I was starting to worry my kidneys would just implode one day).
---------------------------------

-I'm about 30lb overweight... losing weight seems very slow for me. Doesn't help that I can't stand counting calories each day, which I need to do... but I'm slowly realizing just how much I need to eat each day, which isn't that much. The weight seems to be distributed in a manner (basically I'm a heavy hourglass figure).
-I can't eat any spicy foods; it's akin to getting food poisoning for me. Spent half the day in agony earlier this week because I accidentally ordered something spicy.
---------------------------------

Digestion:
It's alright unless I eat spicy foods or inflammatory foods, or If I don't take my magnesium.

Sleep:
I usually fall asleep super easily, unless I'm having PMS. I don't have a set bedtime, and due to said PMS I tend to flip my sleep schedule every month... not that I want to be nocturnal. I'd love to have a normal sleep schedule.

Diet:
-I'm on Keto; I eat meat, veggies, animal products, and occasionally (very dark) chocolate and (sugar-free) ice cream. I try to keep unnatural foods to a minimum. I've noticed if I eat too many carbs in one sitting, I become sluggish physically and mentally. I mainly eat meat, but I’ve been trying to add more veggies lately.
-I'm mainly on Keto to prevent seizures, among other mental health issues (crippling anxiety and something akin to multiple personality disorder).
-Also can't eat sugar or wheat due to inflammation.
-Coconut gives me inflammation issues as well.
-Carrot, cucumber, and radish / beet/ turnip allergies.
-I can’t eat brussels sprouts and I can’t eat broccoli unless it’s cooked from fresh. Cauliflower is okay, though.
-I avoid stevia (natural sweetener), since it seems to kill my mood every time I eat it.

Other:
-Skin: I have eczema. My face has red blotches all over it; I theorize that I have Lupus (my mother has it) but I can't be for sure since I don't have a doctor. I still have acne fairly badly. I have pretty much permanent bags under my eyes, and can see a dark, thin vein running through each of them.

-Internal: I apparently have lower thyroid function than normal (did a home test kit), but it's apparently within normal ranges. I'm anemic, but I have 0 issues if I upkeep my natural blood builder medicine. My cold tolerance isn't what it used to be, but thankfully we moved to a much better climate.

-My hair falls out a lot, especially when I shower. It's... extremely noticeable, since my hair is down to my waist.
-My left arm is severely crippled due to carpal tunnel, wear and tear, and a staph infection years ago. Most likely also hormonal imbalances (low estrogen) contributed to the internal mechanisms of my arm wearing down faster than normal.
-I used to be very seizure-prone and mentally unstable before getting on Keto.
---------------------------------

-I don't think I can do numbers 4 and 5 of the Tibetan Rites due to my arm strength being... non-existent (it hurts to type or even pick up a coffee mug. I can't do a single push-up.) Luckily I do have a yoga routine memorized and do that easily.
-Ah, Void Meditation. I wish I could light candles here for easier Void Meditation, but the apartment doesn't allow it. I'll do that, though.
---------------------------------

-I... really don't want to entirely cut out the video game I play, especially since it's my only form of social interaction... but I'll definitely look into shortening my playtime. Thankfully I already don't use too many phone apps (aside from Safari and Discord) or watch youtube at all really. I feel like I still need to keep my phone close by so I can look up meditations etc.
---------------------------------

-I'm not sure what a TCM... is?
-I also don't have any money, insurance, or method of transportation... so I'm not sure how well that would go. I haven't been able to see a doctor in 15 years.

-

Thank you for all the advice.
 
Tirnenn said:
Soaring Eagle 666 said:
-I've had low energy pretty much my entire life. I have no clue if I have any negative energy or an unwanted entity on me.
-I very rarely meditate... seems every time I do, I meditate for a few days then my brain drops it out of my mind; I forget entirely. I tried opening my chakras yesterday but I don't think it's holding over today.
"I very rarely meditate" - There's your problem. Daily meditation is one of the most important things you can do for your health and energy. If you have trouble remembering, try setting a reminder, like a big page with red ink taped up by your bed. If you have trouble finding the time, start small. This is about the shortest possible daily routine:

Aura Cleaning
Aura of Protection (For extra protection, vibrate ALGIZ once after each affirmation.) [img=https://satanisgod.org/www.angelfire.com/empire/serpentis666/IhwarRune.gif][/img]
Chakra Spinning

For a start, just try to do those three short meditations once, every day. Just 10 minutes a day is infinitely better than 0. I guarantee you'll see positive results if you can stick to a daily schedule! :)
 
Soaring Eagle 666 said:
Yeah... I'm starting to realize that.

So far I have:

-Aura Cleaning
-Chakra Alignment
-Chakra Spinning
-Aura of Protection
-Void Meditation
-Yoga

For a daily routine.

Doing the Chakra Spinning especially, I can feel it.
Doing it to the Crown Chakra felt rather blissful, and doing it to the Sacral Chakra strangely seemed to affect the abdominal muscles into tightening.

To think if I had been doing all of this the past 10-ish years I've been dedicated... but, no use in feeling guilty about the past; onwards toward a better future.
 
Tirnenn said:
Soaring Eagle 666 said:
Yeah... I'm starting to realize that.

So far I have:

-Aura Cleaning
-Chakra Alignment
-Chakra Spinning
-Aura of Protection
-Void Meditation
-Yoga

For a daily routine.

Doing the Chakra Spinning especially, I can feel it.
Doing it to the Crown Chakra felt rather blissful, and doing it to the Sacral Chakra strangely seemed to affect the abdominal muscles into tightening.

To think if I had been doing all of this the past 10-ish years I've been dedicated... but, no use in feeling guilty about the past; onwards toward a better future.

You can do the cleaning of every chakra and the whole soul with visuddhi and after that ad the foundation meditation which is very important if you want to advance. All this after rtrs should help you instantly.

In short ad the foundation meditation to help you with the low energy and try a rune working to be consistent or whatever you might need in general to advance.

And about the rtrs, you don't need to vibrate them, just say those as normal words but remember the intention, which is crucial. Intend to destroy the letters forever. Rtrs are helping you get rid of blockages in the soul, an rtr can even stimulate the kundalini, and can help one a lot in time.

Every mantra or rune in general can even work if you vibrate it in your mind. It will of course don't have the same effect but in desperate situation like I was in because of the lack of intimacy, it is better than nothing at all.

"Keep advancing" is something I everyday have in my mind, let aside if I am in bathroom, near my parents, in a public bus, or wherever else, I try to meditate as much as I can.
Try, as well, to do a rune working with Sowilo or Raidho for example, to make you just act and advance, or improve anything you feel there's a problem with and remember to always keep going whatever happens..
 
Tirnenn said:
Soaring Eagle 666 said:
Yeah... I'm starting to realize that.

So far I have:

-Aura Cleaning
-Chakra Alignment
-Chakra Spinning
-Aura of Protection
-Void Meditation
-Yoga

For a daily routine.

Doing the Chakra Spinning especially, I can feel it.
Doing it to the Crown Chakra felt rather blissful, and doing it to the Sacral Chakra strangely seemed to affect the abdominal muscles into tightening.

To think if I had been doing all of this the past 10-ish years I've been dedicated... but, no use in feeling guilty about the past; onwards toward a better future.
Wonderful! I'm glad to hear that it's helping. Keep it up! :D

That feeling in the abdominal muscles is probably due to the extra energy released by spinning the lower chakras, which cannot ascend fully until you spin the higher chakras. That's why chakra spinning should be done on all seven chakras each time. If the feeling becomes painful, you can avoid it by starting at the crown chakra and spinning each chakra all the way down. When you spin the base chakra, that energy burst will have a clear path to the top!
 
Guess I'm doing a not-so-good update...

I fell off the wagon 15 days ago, hard, due to an extreme amount of stress and anguish, haven't really... done anything spiritually since.

Really wish it wasn't so difficult for me to stick with things long-term, but here we are yet again.
 
Going to also note that even before I fell off entirely, my meditations and such were becoming progressively... sloppy, rushed, etc. I feel like PMS had a hand in screwing with that as well, as my sleep schedule flipped itself on its ugly head again (stuff like this really makes me feel dysphoric again, sigh).
 
Tirnenn said:
Going to also note that even before I fell off entirely, my meditations and such were becoming progressively... sloppy, rushed, etc. I feel like PMS had a hand in screwing with that as well, as my sleep schedule flipped itself on its ugly head again (stuff like this really makes me feel dysphoric again, sigh).

Don't beat yourself up so much. Blood deficiency can make you feel fatigued, spaced-out, etc. Not easy to meditate on these circumstances. Furthermore, this blood deficiency will make the PMS worse, or will give you PMS to begin with. I am referring to TCM by the way, which is Traditional Chinese Medicine: a holistic healthy philosophy. Holistic healing is your ticket to health (as for everybody as well).

-------------------------------------

Focus on the yoga that you can do and do as much as you can. Yoga is essential for directly healing and empowering the physical body, which is your weak point right now. Each hatha yoga move will add energy into the organs pertaining to the nadis/tissues that it is stretching, for example.

-------------------------------------

Next, focus on daily massage of the acupressure points related to your PMS. Start with these points and narrow down a few that seem to help. Some symptoms will get better immediately, whereas others reflect more chronic conditions. However, stimulation of the acupoint will immediately start the healing process of the organ associated with that acupoint.

The "Three yin crossing" point nourishes the liver, spleen, and kidneys at the same time, for example, and is great for restoring blood and liver health, genital/urinary functioning, as well as digestive strength.

Some of the points may feel slightly sore, which is expected. You will sometimes find them inside little spaces of bone or other nooks and crannies, but not always. Using your finger, as long as you push in the general area, you will hit it. Push with moderate strength and rub in small circles or hold. The better the longer, but try at least 2-5 minutes. You can just watch TV while doing this, for example.

These points and yoga will help your blood deficiency (mostly associated with liver), qi deficiency (mostly associated with spleen), and PMS. Furthermore, it should help you fix your sleep schedule, which is critical for maintaining your health. You will eventually learn exactly which points correspond to the symptoms you feel and how to resolve them.

-------------------------------------

Diet wise, the keto diet is not ideal for long term health. If you did not suffer from seizures, I would've suggested you go off it immediately. People get success with keto by reducing lots of processed carbs, but healthy carbs are used for energy. Therefore, a carb restrictive diet can often lead to energy deficiency, which then leads to kidney deficiency as they are forced to compensate.

Meat and vegetables can sort of substitute, so just do your best to eat healthy here. Vegetables are good for detoxing and cleaning the body, and are what you need to eat to lose weight. However, your blood deficiency takes precedence over this, so you should eat more nourishing foods for your blood, even if this seems counter to losing weight. The weight will come off later.

Foods that build blood are any that are red in color or full of chlorophyll. Kale, spinach, red meat, beets, grapes, etc. If you can find it, eat lots of animal liver. This is the single best thing you can eat to replenish the liver (which houses the blood in the body).

Remove the icecream entirely. It does not matter if it is sugar free or not. The sweeteners, plus the coldness, plus whatever ingredients are in it will cause a lot of dampness in the body. This will hurt the spleen and chill the stomach, directly leading to weight gain and sluggishness.

Meats like pork nourish both the kidneys and the blood, and are great for your condition. Eggs help the yin of the body (which helps kidneys). They also build blood and tonify the spleen/stomach. Beef and chicken are also good. All animal meat is generally warming and nourishing.

Fish is also good, although usually less warming. Be wary of crab, clam, and octopus which are cold in nature. Your body type probably needs more warming and yang.

For vegetables, go for spinach or kale (builds blood). The caveat is that all your food should be warm and cooked, including the leafy greens. This means buying chopped, frozen kale, for example, and heating it in a pan. Asparagus is good for the kidney yin. Broccoli/cauliflower will detox and aid the liver.

Be careful of cucumber, celery, raw salads...these can be too cooling and are probably not the best for you.

Pungent veggies like onion, garlic, leeks, green onions are generally ok for kapha imbalance, but not if you are having hot flashes and feeling irritable (yin deficiency).

Consider small amounts of safe carbs like sweet potato or squash to aid your qi and thereby aid the kidneys. Just try like 1 meal with safe carbs every few days and judge how your seizures are. I think this will be the best of both worlds where the seizures don't occur, but the body will not be so stressed out by low carbs. This is known as carb cycling, if you wish to google more.

-------------------------------------

Eye bags/dark circles= kidney deficiency. This will result in genital/urinary issues, fatigue, anxiety, etc. The kidneys are batteries for both yin and yang of the body, so deficient kidneys contributes to a lot.

Eczema: This is considered "heat"
, which is similar to inflammation and can mean a yin deficiency or hyperactivity of certain organs. This will resolve with early sleep and healing the kidneys, mainly.

Anemia and hair falling out: Blood deficiency.
The kidneys, liver, and spleen are responsible for creating and maintaining blood in the body.

Seizures: Liver "wind", which means basically the liver is not doing its job as smoothing out energy transmission in the body. The kidneys are responsible for generating liver tissue, so you can see the interplay here.

Acne: If they are mainly red bumps, then this is from heat. If they are white heads, then this is "dampness". Dampness is a type of pathogen that comes from improper digestion, mainly. The spleen is responsible for properly processing food and removing excess moisture. When it is weak and doesn't do this, then dampness accumulates. Dampness is a yin pathogen and is associated with kapha imbalance, such as gaining weight.

The point here is that if you focus on spleen health, this is the route to lose weight and get rid of whiteheads. Certain foods in each category are good for removing dampness, so there is no need for keto or other restrictive diets for the purpose of weight loss. You would want to follow a "kapha diet" for this, but focus on the other issues first.

Low thyroid function: Basically yang deficiency of the body.

Allergies: If the allergies occur during digestion, this is due to digestive weakness. Could be either spleen or stomach. If they occur when they touch your skin, this suggest lung/large intestine weakness. The allergies will go away as the digestion improves. You can substitute for these foods anyway, so don't worry too much about it.

Left arm: I assume it will heal better once you have better blood quality. The spleen is responsible for maintaining the tissues, whereas the liver maintains the tendons/ligaments (with blood).

-------------------------------------

The above is not to scare you, but rather just so you can see clearly what you are dealing with. The acne and eczema are secondary symptoms and will be fixed once the organ imbalances are corrected. The weight can be fixed easily, but you should focus on healing the organs with heavier foods before you worry about weight loss.

The yoga will directly energize and benefit the organs. Hatha yoga is more yin in nature, and will repair the tissues of the organs. Kundalini yoga, Tibetan 5 Rites, cardio, weight lifting, are all yang style and will benefit the ability of the organs to do their jobs (filtering, digesting, processing, etc).

You should do as many hatha and T5R poses as possible. Don't worry about it feeling incomplete or anything. Every single pose will directly push your body in the right direction, especially combined with acupuncture. You can even do each routine 2x a day, for example.

Also consider some sort of cardio or other movement that you can do. Jumping jacks, walking, pacing around. I am sure you can google or find something. Idk if your apartment has a gym or not. You could get an inexpensive peace of equipment or google for this.

-------------------------------------

As far as the meditation goes, this requires a certain amount of willpower to do, which is lacking if you have no prior training, let alone blood and qi deficiency of the body. Do not beat yourself up so much. What you should focus on is just a very small, yet consistent amount of practice.

Each exercise, such as cleaning or spinning or inhaling, will add to the amount of energy your body obtains from the universe every day. Therefore, a clean and fast spinning chakra will yield more energy to the body to allow it to heal faster. You should continue these activities, but not so much that you feel drained.

Instead of spinning for 1 minute on each chakra, just do 15 or 30 seconds. Instead of cleaning for 10 minutes, just do it for 5 minutes, and so on. Start wherever you can comfortably manage. Consider using mantras instead of energy breathing to generate lots of energy. Vibrating takes less willpower than spending time willing energy into you.

Also consider a mantra like SaTaNaMa or a sun mantra like Aum Surya for healing purposes. You don't have to wait for a good astrological date. You can vibrate either of these a small, yet decent amount of times, such as 10x or 20x, then affirm the energy is healing and empowering the physical body.

Void meditation is good for your mental efficiency and willpower and should be practiced as well. This will allow you to push a little more when you are feeling bad and get the ball rolling. For example, you use this new willpower to do yoga, then you don't feel as bad since your physical body is empowered.

Your physical conditions will make it initially harder for you to advance, but it is NOT impossible. Don't think it is impossible, just keep trying. The way out of your situation is to slowly and surely increase your physical and spiritual energy every day. Don't set yourself up to fail by doing too much.

Whenever you feel bad, just convince yourself to do yoga. You can also do energy breathing while lying in bed, for example. You can also hold acupoints while sitting or lying in bed, while watching youtube or whatever. I am hopeful and confident that you can manage the PMS with acupoints, allowing you better sleep and so forth.

Anyway, good luck.
 
Tirnenn said:
Guess I'm doing a not-so-good update...

I fell off the wagon 15 days ago, hard, due to an extreme amount of stress and anguish, haven't really... done anything spiritually since.

Really wish it wasn't so difficult for me to stick with things long-term, but here we are yet again.
Tirnenn said:
Going to also note that even before I fell off entirely, my meditations and such were becoming progressively... sloppy, rushed, etc. I feel like PMS had a hand in screwing with that as well, as my sleep schedule flipped itself on its ugly head again (stuff like this really makes me feel dysphoric again, sigh).
Sorry to hear that. :(

I've struggled with rushing sloppily through my meditations, but one trick that helps me is to set an end time. My morning meditation routine takes 1 hour, so I set a time for myself 1 hour in the future, saying that I won't do anything else until then. When I have the urge to start rushing, I tell myself that I can't do anything until that end time, which is far away. This mental trick removes the incentive of rushing.

In your case, I encourage you to time yourself doing your meditation schedule properly. Once you know the length, in the future when you start meditating, you can add the length to the current time to get your target end time.

It also helps if you employ void meditation while doing other meditations. Keep a pad of paper handy, and if you get a distracting idea, write it down and forget about it. Focus on each meditation one at a time, and just tune out everything else. You'll be done before you know it! :)

If you miss a day, don't beat yourself up and quit. Just forget it and continue the next day!
 
Tirnenn said:

I didn't mean to go overboard with my last post, but I wanted to clearly spell out everything because I wanted you to have everything factor going in your favor.

Your way out of your health issues will be found in yoga and in doing self-acupressure. This will steadily improve your health, and with your newfound energy you can do even more to improve it. Like getting the ball rolling, so to speak.

The important part is that you don't give up, even if you have take a few days off. Just keep pushing and brainstorming as to how to make progress. Don't overload yourself with too many taxing meditations at the start, rather focus more on your health to build up your energy.
 
Blitzkreig [JG said:
" post_id=244387 time=1618622599 user_id=21286]
Tirnenn said:
Your way out of your health issues will be found in yoga and in doing self-acupressure. This will steadily improve your health, and with your newfound energy you can do even more to improve it. Like getting the ball rolling, so to speak.

The important part is that you don't give up, even if you have take a few days off. Just keep pushing and brainstorming as to how to make progress. Don't overload yourself with too many taxing meditations at the start, rather focus more on your health to build up your energy.
Funny how I find this when I am wondering just how to proceed... again.

(See how this is over a year later? Yeah. I'm not proud of myself either.)

Trying again, starting again.

Less distractions this time, more motivation this time.

Ave Satanas.
 
Tirnenn said:
Blitzkreig [JG said:
" post_id=244387 time=1618622599 user_id=21286]
Tirnenn said:
Your way out of your health issues will be found in yoga and in doing self-acupressure. This will steadily improve your health, and with your newfound energy you can do even more to improve it. Like getting the ball rolling, so to speak.

The important part is that you don't give up, even if you have take a few days off. Just keep pushing and brainstorming as to how to make progress. Don't overload yourself with too many taxing meditations at the start, rather focus more on your health to build up your energy.
Funny how I find this when I am wondering just how to proceed... again.

(See how this is over a year later? Yeah. I'm not proud of myself either.)

Trying again, starting again.

Less distractions this time, more motivation this time.

Ave Satanas.

Yeah, I was a little upset that you were absent for so long. Do not worry so much about the massive dietary post I made. In reality, it is your vitality and soul's solar energy which most strongly influence your health. Someone with a strong Sun will be naturally healthy and more able to eat what they want.

Although you should seek to permanently upgrade your solar energies through a larger working, doing daily yoga will add that same energy to you on an immediate basis.

The solar energies of your soul may generate, for example, +25 health/per day, but doing a good yoga routine may add +50 or +70 health points. This surplus of health points will start to change your health for the better, reducing and removing certain symptoms. Then, your bad days won't be so bad, until you can eventually "tank" them with enough surplus health.

In my opinion, yoga is much easier to do than meditations, plus it should feel directly energizing, not taxing on your mind or body. Since it also gives spiritual and physical empowerment, then it makes sense to focus heavily on that as your way out of your current struggle.

For yoga, there are many options:

Hatha/Kundalini Yoga

Tibetan 5 Rites

Solar Chakra Kriya

----------------------

Overall, it is earth energy like Nauthiz that gives discipline, but obviously, if your willpower is lacking, then you would require more discipline to get the same result. This is where Sun/Fire energy is used, to recharge your willpower, health, mental confidence, etc.

If your Sun and Mars are in bad signs or have bad aspects, then you will know that is your problem. Similarly, if your Saturn is bad, and you are lacking other earth placements, then you know any lost productivity is an earth problem.

Another way to think about it: If you feel good and happy, but just feel like doing work is boring, then that is a discipline problem. If you feel unwell, depressed, or unwilling to do anything, then that is more of a fire problem.

Working with both types of energy, through 40-day workings, will help you achieve permanent changes.

Good luck!
 
Blitzkreig [JG said:
I'm actually kind of amused - and touched - that somebody remembered me and had concern after all this time.
I'm not so sure it's a weak Sun; my Sun Sign is Aries after all (it's partially why I have Sailor Mars as my picture, Exalted in Aries). Ascendant is Scorpio (Mars?). I'm really not sure how to assess for bad aspects.

Looking at this reply lead me to realizing a Sun Square was/is definitely for the best. All of the detail in the post about Squares is really helpful. I did the first day of the working about an hour ago. I added the yoga pages to my routine, although I don't think I have the physical strength (yet) to do most of it.

Doing meditation definitely feels more like "boring work"... although my lack pf physical energy doesn't help much. No depression when thinking of doing meditation/yoga/etc.

I'll definitely work with the Sun Square to start off with, for now.

I appreciate all the help.
 
Blitzkreig [JG said:
Apologies for the double-post, but do you have any idea what type of Planetary Square would be best to free oneself of PTSD? Particularly sexual and... well, my signature also basically says the other type of trauma.

In short, I feel like it would be Mars (ie the Sacral Chakra) since that seems related to what the issue is, but I'm really not sure if it would be Mars and I'm also not sure what type (Physical or Spiritual) or affirmation I would use. Or if a Planetary Square would be the best thing to do, but I prefer doing those.

Obviously I'm not going to be changing my mind on the subject in my signature, but it would certainly be nice to go through life without having negative reactions (ranging from nausea all the way to suicidal spirals) just because I saw a chain of PTSD-related (yet completely normal) words.

Anyways, advice is definitely appreciated.


On a happier note... I've been far better since I started doing the Sun Square. Best I've ever felt in my life. I am continuing this trend.
 
Tirnenn said:
Blitzkreig [JG said:
Apologies for the double-post, but do you have any idea what type of Planetary Square would be best to free oneself of PTSD? Particularly sexual and... well, my signature also basically says the other type of trauma.

In short, I feel like it would be Mars (ie the Sacral Chakra) since that seems related to what the issue is, but I'm really not sure if it would be Mars and I'm also not sure what type (Physical or Spiritual) or affirmation I would use. Or if a Planetary Square would be the best thing to do, but I prefer doing those.

Obviously I'm not going to be changing my mind on the subject in my signature, but it would certainly be nice to go through life without having negative reactions (ranging from nausea all the way to suicidal spirals) just because I saw a chain of PTSD-related (yet completely normal) words.

Anyways, advice is definitely appreciated.


On a happier note... I've been far better since I started doing the Sun Square. Best I've ever felt in my life. I am continuing this trend.

Removal of trauma, or other heavy karma should be done with Munka or Ansuz, not a planetary square. See more here: https://www.ancient-forums.com/viewtopic.php?p=380439#p380439

Someone could make the case that Mars itself can remove things, and that is true, but that is not true for other planets like Venus, for example. If you had heavy Venusian karma, and you used a Venus Square, I think it would be an inefficient use of your energy, as it would run into the karmic obstacles.

It is better to first remove the obstacles before applying the positive energy. Yet, this does not have to be done in all cases. In regards to planetary squares specifically, these only are possible at certain times in the year, so you have to be efficient with their use.

--------------

For the spiritual/physical question, think of it more like internal vs external to your soul. Your physical body, mental body/emotions, and deeper soul are all interlinked, therefore you use spiritual solutions for this.

If you look at what HPS Maxine defines as material uses of a Square, this refers to influencing the world around you. In the case of Mars, you a material use would be perhaps finding a Martian-type job, winning a fight, etc, not permanently healing or upgrading your soul.

For affirmations, something simple like "This energy of [Munka/Ansuz/Uruz/Surya] has permanently removed any negative karma pertaining to [any trauma/a specific planet/part of your body or soul/a certain concept/etc], in the best manifestation for me." x9

Most likely, you will have to do this for 120 days, depending on your power and so on. You will know that the issue is resolved when you no longer feel any negativity pertaining to it, or as a result of the karma removal. Likewise, stay strong during the working and keep going. Some times you may be uncomfortable about the problem being resolved, but then you will feel better afterward.

Also, glad to hear about your Sun Square success.
 
Blitzkreig [JG said:
" post_id=386008 time=1662164562 user_id=21286]

...gods, now I remember. I had actually tried to do that 40-day working previously. I was cut off on Day 35 because I couldn't get any privacy. I think cutting it off backlashed, because I spiraled into one of the worst bouts of depression I had ever experienced... for years.

I'm not sure if I can really handle 108 times each for 120 days; my throat tends to hurt even after 35 repetitions of a phrase or chant, very weak throat and/or throat chakra. When I did the working years ago, I remember doing 54 repititions of Munka.

I'm still unsure of the working's affirmation, but I think I remember my roommate saying (a while ago) that my sacral chakra was damaged... so I could start there.
 
Tirnenn said:
...gods, now I remember. I had actually tried to do that 40-day working previously. I was cut off on Day 35 because I couldn't get any privacy. I think cutting it off backlashed, because I spiraled into one of the worst bouts of depression I had ever experienced... for years.

I'm not sure if I can really handle 108 times each for 120 days; my throat tends to hurt even after 35 repetitions of a phrase or chant, very weak throat and/or throat chakra. When I did the working years ago, I remember doing 54 repititions of Munka.

I'm still unsure of the working's affirmation, but I think I remember my roommate saying (a while ago) that my sacral chakra was damaged... so I could start there.

Yes, do however many reps you can support. In my own experience, my throat had quickly improved the more I pushed it. Beyond the throat chakra itself, this can be related to overall vitality and the ability to sustain this activity, or repair afterwards.

Your affirmations are just a written guide for you to focus on a certain concept and other conditions. In other words, you already know about the idea in your head, now you just need to turn it into a written expression. In reality, the wording doesn't even need to be grammatically correct, as long as you understand it. It could also be an image or something.

The important part is just that you capture what you are changing and you can repeat that energetic process over every day of the working.

Yes, your sacral chakra could be damaged, although any damage from an event can extend beyond that. At the same time, focusing on any sacral chakra damage, not just that from one event, could would help improve your energy and other sacral functions even more.

Therefore, you have to think about what is most important to you. What are your major limitations or stressors? These should be targeted first. Keep in mind that fully resolving major problems can take a long time, but it should still like it is getting better. You don't have to finish it entirely in one working, but you could stop and restart after doing 80 days, for example. Sometimes this is necessary when good conditions arise for other workings.
 
Tirnenn said:
For the record, I'm 30. Female.

I'm rather tired all the time and don't know why.
I keep forgetting to do things even if I have a reminder in front of my face.

As for the procrastination, I've been a (dedicated) Satanist for 11 years and... as far as spiritual prowess goes, I may have as well started yesterday.
Nothing seems to motivate me to do much of anything spiritual for more than a couple days.
It took me about a year just to make this thread because I kept procrastinating and forgetting about making said thread.


(This is unrelated to the main topic I began typing about, but libido is in the negatives... mainly due to trauma / PTSD that happened about 7 years ago. I wish that was gone, but I feel like I can't really do anything about it at the moment.)

You sound like me a couple years ago. Everyone saying consistency is key is right. If you feel highly unmotivated, start with 1 breath for certain things. Then as you set these minimum goals, you will gradually become motivated and it will come naturally. Gradually increase (ex: 1 breath aura cleaning, next week 2, by the time a year is up you could be doing the full aura cleaning each day and it will seem normal and easy) Also I know this is said a lot, but drinking enough water is important. Drink a glass first thing after you wake up even if you are running late. I used to want to sleep 10 or more hours a day and over time my energy levels have increased. I still have days where I struggle to focus, but feel better that I am at least trying my best. You will feel better when you can stick to your routine/goals, now matter how small they start. I stagnated for many months and things are finally improving. You can grow too! You can do this!

Hail Satan
Hail Eligos
 

Al Jilwah: Chapter IV

"It is my desire that all my followers unite in a bond of unity, lest those who are without prevail against them." - Satan

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