i'm sorry

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i really don't know what i want to do with life

If you want sex and you can have it then go get it from legal, clean/healthy prostitutes (or sex workers, I don't know how to politely call them) or whatever you have arond you, that's probably going to sort your problems out nearly completely. What stops you to do that? Regarding relationships, nowadays so many people are so full of crap, individualist and materialist that having a healthy serious relation is increasingly difficult and a waste of time in many cases, time which you can spend to develop yourself but having a relationship is up to everyone's will. Yet you obviously have magic on your side to use, which definitely will help you but might take some time depending on how consistent you are with it. For example do this meditation:

MUNKA x 9 in chrown chakra
Repeat for all chakras
AUM x1
Afirmation x 10: My soul is completely and permanently freed from any karmic problems, curses and negative energies, in the most healthy ways for me.`
AUM x1

I tell you honestly I did it daily for a few weeks but I gave up because I couldn't stand the mental pressure. I also got karmic problems which I have to solve but the `solutions` are not very easy. When I stopped, the `problems` went back down. It seems your problems are already putting a lot of mental pressure on you, but I don't understand what stops you to fix them.

Also if you feel worthless, I think it's also because you don't have a goal in life. You need the ambition to do something great with your life. For example regarding financial independence and work/money, do a course that is nicely paid, like IT or plant/machinery operator, something that is relatively short (a few weeks or months) but which can bring you a good job. You don't need a big house or something, if you are on your own you only need a 1 bedroom apartment or something like that. If you got others to help you is even better. As I said if sex is pressing you so much then go get it and then start to sort your life out. On longterm if you like a certain domain you can start a university degree and do something even more meaningful.

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

Henu the Great wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

You can heal yourself from this and much more by consistent meditation routine, and also by dropping harmful things such as you are taking now. The nature of the substance you are on right now is such that it is advisable to gradually reduce the intake. I have been on the same type of "medicine" in the past, and I quit cold turkey. It was slightly unpleaseant, but doable. It can be dangerous when one has been on it for longer periods of time, so I don't recommend it.

thank you and i am coming off the medicine slowly now i went from 10mg to 5mg to now 2 mg so in two months it'll be lowed again :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
though meditation sounds cool and fun and is necessary i just don't really know how to do it especially the visualization as i said before now i'm at a point where everything but relationships and sex feels pointless including a good career i'm sorry i don't know why i feel that or better yet a lack of feeling towards these things and i'm thinking of dieing cause life seems pointless except the sex relationships which i never had and immersing myself in Nature is just about what keeps me going even being on the PC feels like shit now i feel too detached and Neutral about stuff even i don't want family love or brotherly love for some reason...... :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:

Just start from the very basics, and do not worry too much.

If you want to practice visualisation alone, look up Hells Army 666 page on ToZ. On the very first month, the most basic things one has to learn is to learn to visualise. Do them. Do them for as long as you need to, take your time since this is not a contest of who is the fastest. You are racing yourself alone, and once you start beating the you of yesterday, you are winning.

I'm sorry Miss Jackson, I am for real.

:lol:

Ol argedco luciftias wrote:

I'm sorry Miss Jackson, I am for real.

:lol:

Of all the songs olie, this one was classic.

Ramier108666 wrote:

Ol argedco luciftias wrote:

I'm sorry Miss Jackson, I am for real.

:lol:

Of all the songs olie, this one was classic.

The video was so funny with all the animals talking.

The Alchemist7 wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i really don't know what i want to do with life

If you want sex and you can have it then go get it from legal, clean/healthy prostitutes (or sex workers, I don't know how to politely call them) or whatever you have arond you, that's probably going to sort your problems out nearly completely. What stops you to do that? Regarding relationships, nowadays so many people are so full of crap, individualist and materialist that having a healthy serious relation is increasingly difficult and a waste of time in many cases, time which you can spend to develop yourself but having a relationship is up to everyone's will. Yet you obviously have magic on your side to use, which definitely will help you but might take some time depending on how consistent you are with it. For example do this meditation:

MUNKA x 9 in chrown chakra
Repeat for all chakras
AUM x1
Afirmation x 10: My soul is completely and permanently freed from any karmic problems, curses and negative energies, in the most healthy ways for me.`
AUM x1

I tell you honestly I did it daily for a few weeks but I gave up because I couldn't stand the mental pressure. I also got karmic problems which I have to solve but the `solutions` are not very easy. When I stopped, the `problems` went back down. It seems your problems are already putting a lot of mental pressure on you, but I don't understand what stops you to fix them.

Also if you feel worthless, I think it's also because you don't have a goal in life. You need the ambition to do something great with your life. For example regarding financial independence and work/money, do a course that is nicely paid, like IT or plant/machinery operator, something that is relatively short (a few weeks or months) but which can bring you a good job. You don't need a big house or something, if you are on your own you only need a 1 bedroom apartment or something like that. If you got others to help you is even better. As I said if sex is pressing you so much then go get it and then start to sort your life out. On longterm if you like a certain domain you can start a university degree and do something even more meaningful.

thankyou though i the state i live in in the United States legal prostitution is illegal so i can't unless i leave the country which is really expensive just to experience sex though....... also i'd rather have a serious relationship with either a Woman or Man bur i heard from my friends and coworkers that most people don't want romance and just wanna use each other for sex like that former Italian friend of mine who i'm starting to feel HATRED towards and don't trust him at all the one that wanted to offer me "brotherly love" which fucking disgusts me same with "family love" which i hate even more so anyways sorry for going off topic.

on the topic of MAGICK how would i go about this would i need excellent visualization skills? or....Mantras Runes?

also i don't want a big house just like one or two bedroom apartment with a kitchen and bathroom of course don't know where i would complete laundry though :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

also i feel like cutting contact with Friends and family especially family cause i'm feeling really down and starting to feel hatred and resentment toward life.... although i likely won't do that....

i've been told i have such a great imagination when i make up fictional stories of planets, extraterrestrials, magic, astral plane etc. combined together i've been told i should write a book make a video game and make a movie series and try to draw these things though i need to learn more about art to do so and my astrology chart mentioned i could make money off of art :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :ugeek: :ugeek: :ugeek: :ugeek: :geek: :geek: :geek: :geek: 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-)

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

The Alchemist7 wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i really don't know what i want to do with life

If you want sex and you can have it then go get it from legal, clean/healthy prostitutes (or sex workers, I don't know how to politely call them) or whatever you have arond you, that's probably going to sort your problems out nearly completely. What stops you to do that? Regarding relationships, nowadays so many people are so full of crap, individualist and materialist that having a healthy serious relation is increasingly difficult and a waste of time in many cases, time which you can spend to develop yourself but having a relationship is up to everyone's will. Yet you obviously have magic on your side to use, which definitely will help you but might take some time depending on how consistent you are with it. For example do this meditation:

MUNKA x 9 in chrown chakra
Repeat for all chakras
AUM x1
Afirmation x 10: My soul is completely and permanently freed from any karmic problems, curses and negative energies, in the most healthy ways for me.`
AUM x1

I tell you honestly I did it daily for a few weeks but I gave up because I couldn't stand the mental pressure. I also got karmic problems which I have to solve but the `solutions` are not very easy. When I stopped, the `problems` went back down. It seems your problems are already putting a lot of mental pressure on you, but I don't understand what stops you to fix them.

Also if you feel worthless, I think it's also because you don't have a goal in life. You need the ambition to do something great with your life. For example regarding financial independence and work/money, do a course that is nicely paid, like IT or plant/machinery operator, something that is relatively short (a few weeks or months) but which can bring you a good job. You don't need a big house or something, if you are on your own you only need a 1 bedroom apartment or something like that. If you got others to help you is even better. As I said if sex is pressing you so much then go get it and then start to sort your life out. On longterm if you like a certain domain you can start a university degree and do something even more meaningful.

thankyou though i the state i live in in the United States legal prostitution is illegal so i can't unless i leave the country which is really expensive just to experience sex though....... also i'd rather have a serious relationship with either a Woman or Man bur i heard from my friends and coworkers that most people don't want romance and just wanna use each other for sex like that former Italian friend of mine who i'm starting to feel HATRED towards and don't trust him at all the one that wanted to offer me "brotherly love" which fucking disgusts me same with "family love" which i hate even more so anyways sorry for going off topic.

on the topic of MAGICK how would i go about this would i need excellent visualization skills? or....Mantras Runes?

also i don't want a big house just like one or two bedroom apartment with a kitchen and bathroom of course don't know where i would complete laundry though :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

also i feel like cutting contact with Friends and family especially family cause i'm feeling really down and starting to feel hatred and resentment toward life.... although i likely won't do that....

i've been told i have such a great imagination when i make up fictional stories of planets, extraterrestrials, magic, astral plane etc. combined together i've been told i should write a book make a video game and make a movie series and try to draw these things though i need to learn more about art to do so and my astrology chart mentioned i could make money off of art :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :ugeek: :ugeek: :ugeek: :ugeek: :geek: :geek: :geek: :geek: 8-) 8-) 8-) 8-)

i hope evryone here has a clear understanding of my problems and big thanks to the advice and help i received here :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

also i wanted to say i have been using various coping mechanisms lately to feel better about my situation such as going on walks around the neighborhood listening to music especially from video games i used to play as a kid :D :D :D :D breathing exercises spending time on this website practicing visualization and drinking coffee are some of the things i use to cope oh and hanging out with one of my friends usually once a week :D :D :D :D

also i want to ask Blitzkrieg if the supplements i'm taking such as Boron 3mg Magnesium Citrate 200mg Selenium 200mcg and Zinc 50mg. are these helpful for increasing Testosterone cause i think you told me once they are especially the Boron part. oh and i also take a Vitamin D supplement and sometimes Vitamin C supplement i think they are helping but i don't entirely know what they do altogether i'm sure you know alot indepth though like you do with Chinese Traditional Medicine
also is there a specific way to cure me of depression and negativity like negative thoughts cause i want to feel happiness and a sense of appreciation for the good things happening in my life :D :D :D :D :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Blitzkreig wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i'm sorry for all the drama i put in the thread Mini rant with my mom. and i'm sorry for saying that i didn't want to do anything in this world other than lose my virginity although i did give a list on the thread of hobbies i like and wanna do just don't know about a career yet. i'm sorry i said that i wanted to sexually repress myself by not masturbating due to never having a partner in life and sorry for saying i wanted to starve myself due to sexual frustration and bothering everyone that i hate being circumcised and all and feel disgust and low body image due to that.

also i just wanna be independent within a YEAR or TWO not FIVE years that would be to late and i would be too old by then.

Just take a deep breath. I don't think anyone has any ill will towards you. You are the one suffering the most here.

You likely have some karmic issues pertaining to these problems. For now, all you can do is keep trying to advance and slowly remove these issues. Emotionally, it may feel hard to accept certain truths, but just do your best to logically accept them until they are resolved through energy work.

Circumcision is not that big of a deal and can be fixed through cosmetic magic, although usually cosmetics can take a lower priority than other things.

If having your virginity is stressing you that badly, then you should just seek out a prostitute and get it over with. Some people don't want to do this, and I don't know what you think, but I do know that it seems to be weighing on you pretty badly.

i have a favor to ask you its about what certain supplements do cause i'm taking them i made a post explaining how i take Boron Magnesium Citrate Selenium and Zinc i think they are for increasing testosterone and maybe more? could you explain to me indepth what they are for and how they interact with each other also i take Vitamin D and Vitamin C supplements too :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

Blitzkreig wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i'm sorry for all the drama i put in the thread Mini rant with my mom. and i'm sorry for saying that i didn't want to do anything in this world other than lose my virginity although i did give a list on the thread of hobbies i like and wanna do just don't know about a career yet. i'm sorry i said that i wanted to sexually repress myself by not masturbating due to never having a partner in life and sorry for saying i wanted to starve myself due to sexual frustration and bothering everyone that i hate being circumcised and all and feel disgust and low body image due to that.

also i just wanna be independent within a YEAR or TWO not FIVE years that would be to late and i would be too old by then.

Just take a deep breath. I don't think anyone has any ill will towards you. You are the one suffering the most here.

You likely have some karmic issues pertaining to these problems. For now, all you can do is keep trying to advance and slowly remove these issues. Emotionally, it may feel hard to accept certain truths, but just do your best to logically accept them until they are resolved through energy work.

Circumcision is not that big of a deal and can be fixed through cosmetic magic, although usually cosmetics can take a lower priority than other things.

If having your virginity is stressing you that badly, then you should just seek out a prostitute and get it over with. Some people don't want to do this, and I don't know what you think, but I do know that it seems to be weighing on you pretty badly.

i have a favor to ask you its about what certain supplements do cause i'm taking them i made a post explaining how i take Boron Magnesium Citrate Selenium and Zinc i think they are for increasing testosterone and maybe more? could you explain to me indepth what they are for and how they interact with each other also i take Vitamin D and Vitamin C supplements too :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

i take it this does increase testosterone

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

i take it this does increase testosterone

To increase testosterone and to keep it at high level more than taking a few supplements is needed. Actually with nutrition that satisfies all the personal micro and macro needs of you, you would not even need any supplementation. Supplementation however is during modern times needed to an extent depending on the quality of food available and the climate you are in. For example it is very unrealistic to eat so much fish in the northern hemisphere to satisfy all the vitamin d needs of darker period of the year. One thing to remember with supplementation is the bioavailability of different compunds. Taking these orally will mean that they do not have 100% bioavailability due to going through multiple organs before reaching their final destination. So if you are taking for example 3mg of Boron, not all of it will get used.

In a nutshell what to do to increase testo levels:

Exercise regularly, proper exertion, walks do not suffice here
Sleep enough every night, this is of utmost importance and many fall short here
Eat foods that satisfy all your nutritional needs

As a side note. Avoid sugar. Sugar lowers testo levels. This does not mean complete absistence, but it helps to reduce it.

And to go a level above...

Do hatha and kundalini yoga every day. Steadily increase your bioelectricity levels as this will help with health. You can also do workings to increase your male energy.

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

thankyou though i the state i live in in the United States legal prostitution is illegal so i can't unless i leave the country which is really expensive just to experience sex though

If that's what you are looking for, is impossible not to find any wherever you live. I assume on dating websites you can find plenty women who are probably looking for the same thing, yet it doesn't mean they are prostitutes. I also heard around me others who went on dating websites and just met women who would have sex with them only because of `human need` so to say and not neccesarily for money, similar to the women that you can `catch` in a club. There are plenty ways.

The Alchemist7 wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

on the topic of MAGICK how would i go about this would i need excellent visualization skills? or....Mantras Runes?

You need to read the entire Temple of Zeus website and start practicing the meditation programs you find there. Meditation is extremely similar to body-building, you keep doing exercises until you get more more stronger and stronger, is the same with the meditation. The more you meditate the stronger you get spiritually, which gives you more power to control your own life. For example in your case if you would be extremely advanced, you can probably merely program your aura with a simple afirmation to attract women that fit your needs and it will eventually materialize in a matter of days.

thank you i practice visualization a couple times a day but i really need goals in life rather then just being meh as usual although i'm trying to find something to do besides the two jobs i have and just once a week hanging out with my friend i'm not really that organized outside of work but work proves i can be organized though also i didn't know advanced magick could be that powerful i'm bisexual BTW :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
also i make my organized by writing lists it helps me :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

The Alchemist7 wrote:

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

thankyou though i the state i live in in the United States legal prostitution is illegal so i can't unless i leave the country which is really expensive just to experience sex though

If that's what you are looking for, is impossible not to find any wherever you live. I assume on dating websites you can find plenty women who are probably looking for the same thing, yet it doesn't mean they are prostitutes. I also heard around me others who went on dating websites and just met women who would have sex with them only because of `human need` so to say and not neccesarily for money, similar to the women that you can `catch` in a club. There are plenty ways.

well thats true i know someone whos ugly yet gets alot of women cause of his parents money his a big parasite and doesn't take life seriously basically a loser but me on the other hand i'm way more nice and respectful to people cause unlike him i don't view people as objects but i do fantasize about both Men and Women in sexual and relationship sense to see how i feel about it but yes those are good ideas to find people hooking up with someone is a last resort to me though cause lots of people like me with how my personality is and my sense of humor also its easy for me to make friends though it happens a little to fast....

Crystallized Mushroom wrote:

but i never knew what career to pick cause none of them interest me at all for some reason at this point i'll just pick something random if it allows me to be independent and make society and my parents shut up about it

Why not trying to buy a career chart reading from the ToZ astrologers?