When you have some foresight about what you want in life you end up taking that path, there are people that try to stand in the way all over the place. Even saying some of the worst, degrading things, or it sounds like something scary or what you don’t want to hear, you can follow this inner voice and intuition you develop.
It seems like early in life you’re shaped and conditioned to not have the confidence, in a lot of cases, that you actually need to make good decisions and choices. Those good decisions and choices aren’t just for you but also for other people.
There are really big, massive and challenging things. Sometimes someone sitting there telling you “you can’t do this,” “if you pull it off that’d be one in a million,”
Isn’t actually true. One thing I even remember hearing, from my dads side of the family is that what that can be is “calling a bluff,” or it’s a tactic to try to make you nervous and slip. Adults actually can intentionally do that or might not know it’s impactful. They teach us what that is so we can understand what winning is, how to win and how to succeed. I’d have to actually say it was one of my cousins who taught me that, whose brother is a pro-athlete with a lot of fans (also a cousin)
So, with my own kids and in my own family I don’t really work that way. I remember shooting archery with my dad who said it’s as easy as doing the same thing over and over again once you get it right. Remember what you did the last time you did it, and keep doing it.
So, for me now and as someone who teaches a skill, some of the things I’ve said are repeating just what my mentors told me and some of my own. With my own kid, whose skill shows on a canvas whether or not he’ll end up doing that, what he did was his own work. I don’t think I could make art like that until I was well into high school.
That’s a substantial difference when you look at one age from another plus skill, which is also how IQ is measured. That skill, I sat down and did a whole lesson when I could.
I said “Imagine you could paint ANYTHING you wanted, no matter what it is, what do you want to paint?” It was a portrait of someone.
I said okay, let’s do it! It’s that easy. So, even though a portrait can seem difficult we broke down the steps to do it, made the outline and then I took out a reference. He painted the entire thing, using just a few skills. It’s an incredible portrait, made by “just,” a kid.
Our kids and the people around us are only as limited as you make them. Limitations, I try to see past. I came forward about another friend/student making it really far. This wasn’t even a job I’ve been paid for I just help when people ask for it. I loved teaching my friend and it was something that made me happy, he didn’t want to ask but came over anyway because he wanted it.
I think the way he asked was after mulling it over and being shy about it “hey do you think you could help me learn how to draw,”
And he was just willing to listen. He did it every day on his own after he left. He paid it forward by being a good friend to me, and he was also a great influence to even my kids. He stood out to me among a large group of people as being someone who was actually loyal, clean, respectful and honest.
That’s not why I helped him but when you’re clean, respectful and honest or forthcoming that’s when life can actually open doors to you. Whether or not someone seems intimidating, too beautiful, too skilled, or not going up to someone and approaching them as you are is the right way to move forward in life and in adulthood.
That’s also how you’re taught to approach the gods on here.
Another issue is when you don’t feel like what you’re doing is enough, so working on yourself isn’t rewarding enough and it’s not “worth it to be respectful” (you can reference bhad babie’s first appearance with Dr. Phil, she was “acting out,” because her mom overall sucked.
she figured it out in her own way, but there’s got to be a way to come to terms with yourself (internally) and with the world around you, and move forward so you’re not holding onto so much and so you can actually leave the toxic influence that’s holding you back.
there have to be stepping stones in the world for other people to gravitate to, so anyone wanting friends and to be a leader or rock should be strong and clear.